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"Neither Are You"
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Neither Are You

by Paul Taylor on February 2, 2012 at 12:00 am
Story: Wapsi-Archive
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Discussion (262) ¬

  1. Opus the Poet
    February 2, 2012, 1:49 am | # | Reply

    Guardian Shelly wants to guard Justin.

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 2:59 am | # | Reply

      This would be an excellent time for any number of ‘in the know’ people to speak up.

      My choice would be Phix, Monica, or that little blue talking doll.

      Oh, and let’s not forget Monica’s dog (who can dail a telephone AND order pizza, grab water out of the frig AND open it for use, and is absolutely incapable of things a dog should be able to do… case squirrels and catch frisbees)

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 3:14 am | # | Reply

      OOOOOOHHH, boy.

      He’s a law enforcement officer. that means there is a good chance he’ll get into a epically serious situation like an attempted bank robbery or hostage situation (especially if his ‘higher-ups’ know of his ability).

      Then the self-important mass media get involved.

      Shelly sees the report on the telly and sees Justin in the thick of it…

      EPIC OUCH!!!

    • Vorlonagent
      February 2, 2012, 1:01 pm | # | Reply

      Now that we’ve established what you are Shelly, let’s talk “job performance”… 🙂

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 2:07 pm | #

        Hey, she’s a novice on the job, she’s only had her current hybrid form (Shelly-in-our-world conjoined with Shelly-the-sphinx) for a few weeks Wapsi-time, and has just recently hooked up with her practicum advisor (Phix). She’s barely in the “apprentice” class… hasn’t yet “walked the tables” to journeywoman status yet.

        Let’s cut the lass a break, shall we? 🙂

      • Vorlonagent
        February 2, 2012, 3:32 pm | #

        I will if Justin will.

        You must admit the irony content in talking about “protecting” the guy she just sliced to the bone.

        Sure, I know Shelly’s just started adjusting and all that, but if the line cuts no ice with Justin, it doesn’t matter much what I think.

        It’s obvious to us she’s trying to convey that she doesn’t see him as some kind of paranormal S&M playtoy, but she’s not communicating that well. She’s been communicating poorly this whole scene. I have sympathy as to why she is, you understand, but it only matters if Justin does too.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 2, 2012, 3:58 pm | #

        Oh, absolutely. Cut them both a massive break. As has been the theme throughout Wapsi, there aint no bad guys, there aint no good guys, there’s just you and me. Well, except maybe for the priests. I would not, however, be too surprised if, down the line, we learn they had compelling reasons to do what they did too. Okay, maybe not.

      • Maark30
        February 2, 2012, 10:00 pm | #

        Of course they had compelling reasons for doing what they did. Of course so did Stalin and Hitler. Phix only said that they were no bad guys in the current events, that had nothing to do with what happened in the time of Lanthis.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 3, 2012, 12:17 am | #

        Well, I meant no bad guys in the sense that what the characters did was for good and nobel reasons. It’s possible, given the views of the times in which they lived, it’s even possible the priests did what they did for good and nobel reasons as well. W see it as very bad, but it may not have been for the times. Abuse of slaves was normal at multiple times in history afte all. Heck, slavery itself was as well. Times change, and so do social norms.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 3, 2012, 12:20 am | #

        Oh, and Monica also said the same thing about no bad guys:
        http://wapsisquare.com/comic/justus/

      • Maark30
        February 3, 2012, 12:35 am | #

        sort of, But in that case she was taking about the immortal politicos. They were not the Lanthian priests. When the Calendar was made the Lanthian world was a matriarchy, The Priests that harmed the girls were some time later after thy stomped out the matriarchy and replaced it with their own.

      • Yamara
        February 3, 2012, 12:54 am | #

        That’s a good one. Especially with Jin’s promise to never knowingly lie to Monica thrown in.

        Of course, “Just you and me” can be interpreted darkly…

  2. Tristan
    February 2, 2012, 1:49 am | # | Reply

    That’s some conversation they’re having… No wonder he’s messed up.

    • zacharaiaha
      February 2, 2012, 2:03 am | # | Reply

      Indeed. He’s been a victem for a lot of people who get their kicks hurting others. His healing makes him perfect. I wonder how long it took him to break the sub mindset to try and get away. But running is not the answer that lasts. It’s also obvious the Justin has no idea of who or what Shelly really is either. So this is going to shake both their world views. Maybe healing can be found for both of them.

      • Kerachuan
        February 2, 2012, 7:45 pm | #

        Justin, an advanced golem prototype, figured he was done with being an experiment and floor model. He would not want to become the hostage used to control a feral sphinx. There are three options: run for the hills, seek counsel and refuge in the library or maybe Shelly can save his head when it all goes wrong.

    • Dave
      February 2, 2012, 2:03 am | # | Reply

      At least they’re communicating. Finally!

      And, yeah, you’re right. Being a self-regenerating chew toy for paranormal harpies (literally or metaphorically) could really mess up a guy. The body would heal… the heart and spirit, maybe not.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 6:00 am | #

        Called it!

        Let’s see which regenerative personage or bloodline he is…

        And dang, Panel Five Shelly. I know they don’t have cable in the Time Forest, but human nature? Lack of socialization for 80k only allows for so much gormlessness.

      • bmonk
        February 2, 2012, 10:49 am | #

        As long as he’s not a troll. Shelly deserves more than a troll.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 2, 2012, 4:07 pm | #

        Hey, in the Wapsiverse, even a troll can be made out to be a misunderstood being and not really a bad sort. At least the ones who settle in that area. I mean, what did you think of sphinxes or gorgons before reading Wapsi? Horrible, flesh destroying/eating creatures with a penchant for dealing out horrific deaths, right?

      • Maark30
        February 2, 2012, 10:02 pm | #

        It all comes down to forgetting the smear campaign that is mythology I guess.

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 11:12 am | #

        Shelly remains Shelly, despite eons in the Forest. She’s a sweetheart, but she’s not the quickest-witted of the gang… it sometimes takes her a while to catch up with what is being said. In yesterday’s strip, she misinterpreted Justin’s “Enough time has passed, I’m fully healed” statement… betcha Monica would have caught the meaning and understood the implications immediately.

        Give her a bit… she’s not all that naive. I’m sure she’ll be quite properly aghast and incensed on Justin’s behalf once she thinks it through.

      • W.
        February 2, 2012, 9:55 am | #

        Sorry, Dave, I used your ‘chew toy’ adjective below unintentionally. It was so good it stuck.

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 10:56 am | #

        No problem! Fell free to consider it in the public domain 🙂

        It does seem to fit… uggh. That poor guy…

      • eee
        February 2, 2012, 10:58 am | #

        I agree. This is a sad conversation… but it is GOOD they are having it.

    • Atomic
      February 2, 2012, 2:04 am | # | Reply

      “I forgot to say out loud how beautiful you really are to me
      I cannot be without,
      you’re my perfect little punching bag
      And I need you,
      I’m sorry”

      • Fairportfan
        February 2, 2012, 5:31 am | #

        “he hit me … and it felt like a kiss”

      • Maark30
        February 3, 2012, 12:43 am | #

        Ahh, time to play Tom Lehrer’s Massochism Tango http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TytGOeiW0aE&feature=related

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 9:25 am | # | Reply

      I definitely see an understanding ahead.

      I’m looking forward to the end of this little ‘talk’. I can already see it.

      Shelly and Justin are finally satisfied he’s safe (from her using him as a ‘slice-n-dice’ target of opportunity) and she gets somebody she can also trust.

      As Justin turns to walk away, Shelly ‘not-so-playfully’ gives him a swat on the fanny.

      Then she smiles and tells him “payback”.

      Of course, she could say a variety of things.

  3. alexdarkangel
    February 2, 2012, 1:51 am | # | Reply

    Whipping boy to woobie? not bad.

  4. volstaag
    February 2, 2012, 1:53 am | # | Reply

    methinks the plot just thickened.

    • zacharaiaha
      February 2, 2012, 2:09 am | # | Reply

      It’s beyond thick it’s almost to solid and begining to resembel a 4 dimensional roller coaster through quamtum space. All we can do is enjoy the ride and say Wheeeee.

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 2:23 am | #

        If I were a drinking man, I’d want a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster right about now… poured from that big quart-sized Klein bottle over there, if you don’t mind.

      • Stigmartyr762
        February 2, 2012, 2:29 am | #

        I think I’ll join you on that. Make mine a double.

      • kingklash
        February 2, 2012, 2:26 am | #

        “Keep your arms and legs outside the vehicle at every time, and you’ll meet youself on the way out as you come on in, so please no kirilian photography until the track has come to a complete start.”

      • SoWhyMe
        February 2, 2012, 4:09 pm | #

        That’s very good. I especially like the “come to a complete start” portion.

      • Dave11
        February 2, 2012, 7:00 am | #

        If this plot gets much thicker, we’ll be in danger of a black hole forming on the interwebs…

  5. Leeskra
    February 2, 2012, 1:53 am | # | Reply

    I really love that last frame…. <3

    I think they'll be ok now. His scar is healable with Guardian Shelly around – even if it takes the exceedingly long path if needed (where he runs off, breaks it off still, gets hurt, shelly swoops to rescue… or maybe its just late and my imagination is all wonky). 🙂

  6. Ob1Kn00b
    February 2, 2012, 2:00 am | # | Reply

    So he was some people’s living, breathing snuff film…

    Yeah, his panic’s all the more understandable.

    • SoWhyMe
      February 2, 2012, 2:58 am | # | Reply

      It could be other girls also accidently cut him and discovered his healing power. Like Shelly, they may have been all concerned and sorry the first time too, but kept doing it as time went on because they started enjoying it. Sort of “What are you complaining about? You’ll heal right up. So what if I slice you up sometimes.” So it may be he was afraid of the same pattern here, despite Shelly’s tears and heartfelt apology. He’s been through it all before and didn’t want to play that game again. And those may not have even been paranormal chicks.

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 3:19 am | #

        I seriously doubt any of the others were ‘guardians’.

        After all, in virtually EVERY mythology, a guardian ‘whatever’ is incapable of harming an innocent.

        That does tend to put the lie to the past few pages, though, doesn’t it?

      • Simon
        February 2, 2012, 4:40 am | #

        Intent is usually a factor – a guardian may not be able to deliberately harm their ward, but accidentally is a different matter. And Shelly certainly wasn’t intending to slice him open…

      • Craig
        February 2, 2012, 5:59 am | #

        Also, in this particular instance, Justin was not innocent. He hit her first. Now, granted, her sphinx side over reacted, but he started it. On the other pseudopod, he was unaware of the full situation, but he’s not entirely blameless.

        Let’s turn the situation on its head. What if he were dating a girl who had, not recently, escaped a bad relationship with someone whose favorite form of punishment/abuse was spanking. Then here comes Justin, slapping her on the ass out of the blue. Her reaction could range from a punch in the face to an abrupt “Goodbye. I never want to see you again” to a calm “Please NEVER hit me again” (with explanation). Any of them would be justifiable, if you knew her history.

        Justin and Shelly need to keep talking.

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 9:35 am | #

        Maybe I should have said “Innocent mortals”. That would have left open the sense that Justin was still ‘harmable’, but would recover.

        If he hadn’t been, her claws would have torn his shirt to shreds and deflected off his skin.

        As for those three idjits in a recent bar encounter, Shelly did not consider them ‘purely innocent’; but the impulse to do severe damage was still negated by the guardian aspect.

      • My2Cents
        February 2, 2012, 2:50 pm | #

        You might want to rethink that. http://wapsisquare.com/comic/protectorstobefeared/

        In the Wapsi universe mythical figures are more human, and the heroes who ‘defeat’ them just have better publicists who ‘pad’ the story.

  7. Sabreur
    February 2, 2012, 2:00 am | # | Reply

    Okay, feeling a bit more sympathetic towards him now…

  8. Leak
    February 2, 2012, 2:01 am | # | Reply

    Keep Justin safe:

    Today’s experiment…… EPIC FAIL

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 3:01 am | # | Reply

      multidimensional epic fail.

  9. Joe Minotaur
    February 2, 2012, 2:02 am | # | Reply

    A match made in mythology?

    Not quite two hours late, but there it is!

    • Joe Minotaur
      February 2, 2012, 2:11 am | # | Reply

      He did say something about being “Roped”. BDSM?

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 2:12 pm | #

        A distinct possibility… but it sounds as if whatever happened, may have gone well beyond the point of being consensual, with one or more of the people or beings he’d been interacting with.

  10. Ari
    February 2, 2012, 2:06 am | # | Reply

    So you go from being abused in a relationship to being abusive when you find out something you don’t like about her? Nice.

    And of course, I don’t get my wish and he’s STILL around.

    • Casey
      February 2, 2012, 2:09 am | # | Reply

      Depressingly, that’s all too common. Those who have been victims of abuse are much more likely to go on to be abusers themselves (sorry, I tend to go on and on whenever psychology is involved).

      • Ari
        February 2, 2012, 3:42 am | #

        Yeah, I know. All too familiar with that. But I know too many people who have been able to overcome abuse and not go on to be abusers to feel sorry for him. (Yep, I refuse to feel bad for a cartoon character.)

    • Ob1Kn00b
      February 2, 2012, 2:13 am | # | Reply

      Insulting someone and trying to get away from them after they have slashed into you so deep that the person can see ribs is not “abuse after you find something you don’t like about someone.” Good gods, if you want to dislike the guy fine, but at least be remotely sane about it.

      • Ari
        February 2, 2012, 3:39 am | #

        He startled her and as she was apologizing and trying to explain he let loose with calling her crazy and telling her to fuck off. AND While she was seeing if he was okay, he screamed and got in her face. Yeah, that’s abusive and then he continued to shout at her after she explained what she was. Continued abuse because he didn’t like either that she was mythical or crazy. Yeah. Abuse.

        And please…don’t impugn my sanity. Thank you.

      • Rowan Hawthorn
        February 2, 2012, 8:48 am | #

        If Shelly had just turned and yelled at him, or even slapped his face, Justin’s reaction might reasonably be considered extreme. Screaming at someone who just opened your ribs to the outside world is not “abuse”. It’s a normal human reaction. What part of “sane” involves expecting ANYONE to keep their cool under those circumstances?

      • Ozymandous
        February 2, 2012, 10:13 am | #

        Tell you what, let’s put this into context..

        You do the same thing he did under circumstances that you would have zero idea of your partners backstory like we as readers have. You know they are fun to be around, you enjoy spending time with them, etc.

        Let’s say they are in the kitchen cooking, and you walk in and give them a smack on the butt and they turn around and slice you to the BONE. Diagonally from shoulder to abdomen, with the knife, cutting the entire pec muscle group. Skin, muscle, tendons, blood vessels, etc.

        Would you feel their action was maybe a tad bit extreme? Would you meekly sit there and calmly listen while they apologized? If not, they you’d be a hypocrite based on your complaints of Justin’s reactions here.

        Shelly’s reaction was extreme to say the least and to imply that his reaction when he was so seriously injured, that mingled shock, anger (“WTF did you just do to me?!?!”) and a little fear (“wtf did you just DO to me?!”), was unusual is a bit naive.

      • Matthew
        February 2, 2012, 10:57 pm | #

        I have to agree with this here.

        I initially had a lower opinion of Justin, when the comic didn’t make the extent of his injuries clear – if she’d just destroyed her heavy bag, torn his shirt, and scratched his skin (even drawing blood) with her claws/nails, then his reaction could be seen as extreme and unreasonable. However, his reaction is a lot more reasonable and sympathetic after having been dealt a wound that would have been life-threatening to a guy as mortal as he pretended to be. I think some people in the “anti-Justin” argument here are having a hard time letting go of that initial reaction.

        Also, we should try to bear in mind that there are things going on here other than Justin’s traumatic past. He’s also protecting his cover – he in fact did NOT decide that she was crazy out of nowhere and in defiance of the evidence of his senses; he pulled together a hasty cover story to get himself away from the obviously violent supernatural woman before she could notice that his chest was magically healing – it was probably that (as much as any bitterness, though even if I were immortal I’d be pretty bitter if my lover/friend unexpectedly cut me open) that kept him from letting her tend to his wounds, and that prompted him to storm away as quickly as possible.

        Sure, that reveals his inability to trust, but she wasn’t exactly in a trustworthy position, and since he intended to run screaming from any renewed involvement with the supernatural, all he really needed was something to cover his retreat. It might come off as abusive (though I think it’s an understandable level of venom, from someone that severely wounded) but it’s probably just as much bluster, meant to cover up the holes in his reasons to leave, and keep from betraying any (possibly dangerous) awareness of the supernatural to the super-strong woman with claws who’s just blown her own cover.

        And yes, he probably could have been nicer about it, but in his place I imagine my first, second, and third priorities would be “get out of there” and “keep away from the sphinx,” and “don’t reveal myself,” while “be a nice guy” would come in somewhere around fifteenth place. Given those criteria, I think Justin did fairly well, for the spur of the moment.

    • Swedish Chef
      February 2, 2012, 3:13 am | # | Reply

      Strike Justin down with all of your hatred, and your journey towards the dark side will be complete!

      • Jay-Em
        February 2, 2012, 5:40 am | #

        Yeah.. amazing how some scanned-in scribbles on paper can get peeps all riled-up in hate for a fictional character.

        On the other hand, it would be of bigger concern if the creations of a writer wouldn’t entice any reaction…

    • W.
      February 2, 2012, 9:51 am | # | Reply

      He didn’t just find out anything about her. He found out she was another “crazy” supernatural chick, just like all the others that liked to hurt him in many undisclosed ways. He wanted to break it off before said crazy found out about his power and wanted to use him as a chew toy. I don’t know what mythological creatures he was ‘dating’, but there are a lot of real nasties in mythology and I bet they seemed ‘normal’ until they got close.

    • Ozymandous
      February 2, 2012, 10:07 am | # | Reply

      Please explain how *anything* he did was ‘abusive’? What, being afraid and trying to leave what he thought was a bad situation before it escalated?

      Standing up for himself when he’d been sliced WIDE OPEN by those claws? Maybe being a tab bit upset when she did said slicing?

      Or are you referencing the playful smack on the butt? Anyone that would consider *that* abusive then I feel both pity and sadness for. I can only imagine what a relationship would be like with someone who thought that might be “abusive”.

    • Yamara
      February 2, 2012, 1:28 pm | # | Reply

      (Reposted from below; really belongs best on this thread)

      Folks, I’m going to have to defend Ari on one salient point, and that’s that she is coming from a very honest place in detesting the character. It’s not that there cannot be found good reasons to be on Team Justin. The point is that those images from Monday-before evoke situations from reality that are far removed from a cartoon fable about a wronged Osiris and a confused sphinx.

      In the real world, right now, somewhere every few seconds, that scene is occurring between a man with thin skin and a woman who’s done little to deserve her tears. The genders are not reversed or identical anywhere near as often. The events do not end with rapid healing, and the conversations do not swiftly resolve towards a sympathetic mutual understanding.

      They end with actual people bruised, in hospital, with genuine PTSD, or other very permanent destinations. For survivors, the memories are crystalline, and evoking their natures trigger them in all their horror.

      Ari is allowed her revulsion.

      .

      …Back in cartoonland? Shelly, please find out who these merry fangirls are… and bring them before your judgement.

      • Rowan Hawthorn
        February 2, 2012, 4:22 pm | #

        All that’s fine, but it doesn’t go this far >< in changing just who was the injured party, here. Yes, Shelly didn't mean to do it, but a whole bunch of people of all genders and ages get dead in the Real World because somebody did something they Didn't Mean To Do. Asking someone who just came within a cat's hair of being one of those people to be all calm and understanding just because he's a Him instead of a Her is not what I call reasonable – and I've never really been on Team Justin, myself.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 2, 2012, 5:23 pm | #

        Yes, well, that’s the “gotcha” of living in the real world isn’t it? Being a part of a society of people or other animals, means being subject to accidents not of your making. Stuff happens. Of course, as you indicate, that doesn’t mean you have to calmly accept it, but it is nearly unavoidable.

      • Dafydd
        February 2, 2012, 10:40 pm | #

        That’s all true, Yamara, but remember that here Justin is that survivor.

      • Lizzibabe
        February 2, 2012, 11:28 pm | #

        Yamara is allowed to feel what he/she feels. Ari is allowed to feel what he/she feels. You are allowed to feel what you feel. Don’t argue who is right or who is wrong. Please be aware that everybody has their own button points. I think that Paul has done a wonderful piece of writing that so nails the horror of bad things happening by accident that *everybody* out here in peanut-gallery land is able feel *each* side so keenly. Yes, Shelly was frightened. Yes, Justin started it thinking it was a joke. Yes Shelly overreacted by hurting Justin physically. Yes Justin overreacted back by hurting Shelly emotionally. I see that both sides are at fault here. PLEASE be respective that other members of the audience are going to feel hit in their heart with this storyline.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 3, 2012, 12:08 am | #

        Fine, Lizibabe. Tell you what, let’s just ALL pour out our pet issues at every opportunity. That should make the comments section ever so much more interesting. Heck, let’s throw in politics and religion as well. Make this place just like all the rest.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 11:31 pm | #

        Justin is a comic strip character with a plot involving impossible elements that have led to a form of a abuse only possible in a fable.

        Some of his readership are survivors.

        Art is supposed to evoke a response, not replace our sympathies for our fellow human beings. “Justin has been wronged so Ari is insane” is a concept with flaws that should be obvious.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 11:46 pm | #

        And yeah, what Lizzibabe said.

      • Maark30
        February 3, 2012, 12:54 am | #

        Let us , for a moment, forget the whole slashing the poor guy thing after he pulled a sneaky butt slap thing. Part of the problem we seem to behaving is the need to have a right and a wrong. There is none. They are both wrong plain and simple. This is when communication skills (something neither of them has seemed to show any of in the relationship) are useful in fixing the wrongs of this mess of a relationship they have.

      • Rowan Hawthorn
        February 3, 2012, 8:32 am | #

        “Justin is a comic strip character”, so if we’re going to apply real-world experiences, let’s apply ALL of them, shall we?

        Also, yeah, what SoWhyMe said.

    • Ari
      February 4, 2012, 9:24 pm | # | Reply

      Wow…this kept going? See I got called insane and decided it wasn’t worth it. Thank you for the defense Yamara and LizzieBabe. I just put out a reaction about a cartoon character and supported my reasoning for FEELING that way. Yeah, I found what he did abusive and I stand by that. But I don’t think you guys were fair to tease and ridicule me for my opinion. I don’t agree with you but I don’t come after you. I know none of you will read this but…it makes me feel better to get it out there.

      I said previously that I had a reaction like Shelly’s where a boyfriend startled me and I swung a knife. I’ve also said MANY times that I don’t like Justin (or haven’t you noticed? lol). So I’m obviously prone to this opinion. It doesn’t help that I have very firm and passionate feelings about abusive behavior. I get that my comment wasn’t popular but I don’t think I deserved to be attacked.

      Thanks…to whoever reads this later. :-\

  11. Casey
    February 2, 2012, 2:07 am | # | Reply

    So let’s see if I’ve got everything straight. In the past, powerful mythological females have taken advantage of his healing factor to use him for stuff far more violent and painful than what he’s into, and this has left him with an aversion to the supernatural, some trust issues, and a bit of jumpiness regarding anything that might possibly be similar to those experiences (possibly mild PTSD). Someone get this man a therapist!

    • Dave
      February 2, 2012, 2:21 am | # | Reply

      I think you’ve summed it up pretty well, although I have a feeling that his condition is more than “mild” PTSD. Based on how violently he raged at Shelly, and how eager he was to get the hell out of Dodge without having to deal with her, I’d put his reaction more in the “serious” category.

      Therapist – yes, and there’s the rub. How could he find a normal therapist who he could talk to, who wouldn’t immediately categorize him as delusional… or would believe him and want to dissect him to figure out the source of his self-healing knack? How could he even hope to find a paranormal therapist (if there even are any)? Who can he possibly trust, to talk his situation over with? (There’s that “trust” word again… it’s squarely in the middle of his situation!)

      He definitely needs a healing. Hasn’t found one. Shelly may actually be his best hope and best friend in this, if he can get past the obvious fear and reluctance… and maybe, in helping him, she might find some healing for her own unresolved issues (both pre- and post-sphinx).

      • CluelessInNC
        February 2, 2012, 2:40 am | #

        Actually, my experience with therapists leads me to believe that a paranormal one would not be at all uncommon — or do I mean abnormal? (Visualizes normal abs, visualizes throwing nickel into pun jar.)

      • CPUGuy1
        February 2, 2012, 2:46 am | #

        Therapist = Phix … if he is willing.
        I am sure she can give him some mental peace.

      • Fairportfan
        February 2, 2012, 5:34 am | #

        Too bad the co-operative doesn’t seem to know what Tina knew.

      • bmonk
        February 2, 2012, 10:56 am | #

        Maybe Phix is willing to branch out into therapist–or else maybe she knows a good therapist.

        I’d suggest not Nudge–nose flicks don’t help much in therapy, I suspect.

      • Francisco
        February 2, 2012, 11:44 am | #

        But Nudge is not a “Doubt” entity so the rule amendment doesn’t apply to her.

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 3:06 am | # | Reply

      it may not have been just direct trauma, either.

      Think about how it would feel if one of those ‘myths’ came up and ‘stoned’ you (turned you to stone) knowing or suspecting your healing factor would pull you through; but the process took hours or even days.

      You’d be a living, paralyzed statue for how long?

      Not exactly something you’d want to repeat.

  12. Maark30
    February 2, 2012, 2:09 am | # | Reply

    All that is left is for someone to enter the Gym and Justin say “Hello Mom”

    • Paula
      February 2, 2012, 2:20 am | # | Reply

      *chants* phixoreury phixoreury phixoreury
      *coughs*
      wouldn’t it be amusing if it was May

      • Maark30
        February 2, 2012, 2:25 am | #

        Interesting but not very likely. She spent all of the intervening years in Daemon Limbo and many years before that as a Golem,

      • Maark30
        February 2, 2012, 3:38 am | #

        Now Euryale on the on the other hand…

    • Deuce
      February 2, 2012, 7:54 am | # | Reply

      How about a guy in a funny hat . . .

      “Hi Dad, have you met Shelly?”

  13. Qalypso
    February 2, 2012, 2:11 am | # | Reply

    I can sorta see both sides, she seems to be channeling a certain loonytoons character in last panel… I wanna hold you and hug you and squeeze you and never let you go, and still I feel empathy for her twisted immortal soul.

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 10:31 am | # | Reply

      exactly which looney-toon are you talking about?

      I don’t remember any even remotely like the last panel.

      • Boxilar
        February 2, 2012, 11:25 am | #

        I belive this was the refrence.
        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2JlVqfC8-UI

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 2:03 pm | #

        ahhh… that’s a looney I haven’t seen.

        not that I’m surprised, mind you.

        I am rather surprised Daffy got away with ‘winning’ over Bugs. It is the first time I’ve seen Bugs lose.

        Come to think of it, it’s the first time I’ve seen Daffy win.

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 2:05 pm | #

        Of course, I’m the guy who cheers for Wile E, too

      • Maark30
        February 2, 2012, 10:40 pm | #

        It was a very short lived victory.

  14. Dave
    February 2, 2012, 2:14 am | # | Reply

    One of the ways I think “evil” can be defined, is “treating other people as if they were things.”

    It sounds as if Justin has been subjected to some really serious evil. Somebody (apparently lots of somebodies) have used him in ways which perverted an amazing gift into a terrible burden.

    His reticence (hell… his loathing) about the paranormal makes a great deal of sense now. Monica, Shelly, and the other Wapsi folks have, in general, been able to see the paranormal as having both an up-side and a down-side. It looks as if Justin has seen mostly the down side, for who knows how long.

    It wouldn’t be surprising if he’s come to hate himself, or at least whatever it is that he is. Calling him “walking wounded” may have been understating matters.

    • Stigmartyr762
      February 2, 2012, 2:36 am | # | Reply

      If Justin’s not an immortal. Then I have to wonder if he isn’t a Frankenstein creation?

      • W.
        February 2, 2012, 10:07 am | #

        I wonder if he is related to Prometheus? That would explain the healing. Also, it might explain why the supernaturals like to abuse him. Fire was a big gift to mankind that might have pissed off many a supernatural.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 12:12 pm | #

        Cat and Girl reveals today that Prometheus also stole the compact disc and gave it to mankind.

      • W.
        February 2, 2012, 5:12 pm | #

        I can only read so many webcomics a day. Giving me another to read is just one more I have to read. Dang you.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 2, 2012, 5:26 pm | #

        I know what you mean, W. I have a whole directory of comics bookmarks/favorites labled “Pending.”

  15. SoWhyMe
    February 2, 2012, 2:16 am | # | Reply

    Uh huh. So it looks like his only “gift” is rapid healing. No super strength or fast speed. Nothing to protect himself from those who just like to use him as a renewing chew toy. Good reason to keep a low profile. Now, however, he has a protector. He no longer need be the victim of every paranormal schoolyard bully psycho out there. Like she did for the weak kids in school, Shelly can be his guardian now. She has been preparing for this her whole life. Few are going to tangle with Shellinx. Fewer still her paranormal friends. She’s got his back, and they have her back.

    • Maark30
      February 2, 2012, 2:28 am | # | Reply

      Very true. if Shellinx can’t handle it their is always Mama Bear Brandi or Buddy Bud.

      (Drops his paycheck into the pun jar)

      • Fairportfan
        February 2, 2012, 5:36 am | #

        Or Auntie Phix.

      • W.
        February 2, 2012, 10:18 am | #

        Phix for long term strategic planning (she has probably read “The Art of War” by several authors and probably penned a few as well). Bud in need of coffee for pure kickassidness and badassery for immediate destruction of said threat. Just my opinion. 🙂

      • Boxilar
        February 2, 2012, 11:06 am | #

        Talk about bringing thermonuclear weapons to a knife fight. The impression I get is that Monica’s inner circle represents the upper elite of power on Earth. I believe Monica and friends have been kept lisolated from the supernatural community at large because they were dealing with the overarching threat that the calendar machine represented and couldn’t afford any distractions from that. Now that the CM and Jin’s problem have been dealt with, it looks a Phix is slowly easing the Glyph reader and her charges into the everyday supernatural world. I think Eyrale is just the begining. I also think Shelly gives Phix another player to help clean up some of the messes that piled up while the big dogs (or cats) were otherwise occupied with more cosmic matters.

      • Casey
        February 2, 2012, 12:14 pm | #

        So basically Phix knows every trick in the book, and she wrote the sequel?

  16. kingklash
    February 2, 2012, 2:30 am | # | Reply

    So, how old is he, really?

    Poor guy, the first time he finds someone who would treat him like a normal guy, and he’s too into his past treatment to know it.

    • Dave
      February 2, 2012, 2:36 am | # | Reply

      “People see what they want to see”. Or, sometimes, they see what they really do not ever want to see again.

      Learning to see what is actually there, is sometimes the hardest thing.

      • Erik
        February 2, 2012, 4:11 am | #

        Truth is, people don’t see what they WANT to see,
        they see what they EXPECT to see.

      • bmonk
        February 2, 2012, 11:00 am | #

        As we saw Tuesday–I think.

        Or did I see it just because I expected to see it?

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 11:53 am | #

        Si!

  17. Stigmartyr762
    February 2, 2012, 2:30 am | # | Reply

    Well at least they’re talking. That’s a start.

  18. SoWhyMe
    February 2, 2012, 2:42 am | # | Reply

    After all this is hashed out, somebody’s still going to have to find a new bag and clean up the mess before tomorrow.

    • Yamara
      February 2, 2012, 11:43 am | # | Reply

      Took the words out of my keyboard.

  19. Valkeiper
    February 2, 2012, 2:53 am | # | Reply

    I think cleaning the mess in the gym is VERY low on the priority list…

    like about #120 on a list of fifty.

    • SoWhyMe
      February 2, 2012, 3:04 am | # | Reply

      Probably, but no one wants to incur the wrath of Luci!

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 3:22 am | #

        >>>CRING<<<

        good point.

        ok, now it's #3

  20. Valkeiper
    February 2, 2012, 2:54 am | # | Reply

    This makes me want to find some of those other ‘crazy chicks’ and forget they appear to be female.

    • NOTDilbert
      February 2, 2012, 11:07 pm | # | Reply

      In a few issues, there may be a bunch of Wapsi regulars forming up a battle line beside you….We may be headed toward a supernatural battle – the wasters and haters on one side, and Wapsi on the other.

  21. War
    February 2, 2012, 2:55 am | # | Reply

    Second and third panel: Everything that needed to be said by both of them. Well done Shelly.

    I hope next page is her going in some kind of detail on how the very idea of her hurting him by accident has been causing her distress and great pain- and still does.

    I’m thinking that may be something he’s never heard before. He probably won’t listen, but at least he’ll hear it.

    • bmonk
      February 2, 2012, 11:01 am | # | Reply

      As long as, if they stay together, the do share more of the details, and work out acceptable forms of behavior in light of their baggage.

  22. Swedish Chef
    February 2, 2012, 3:00 am | # | Reply

    Wild speculation time: What if some “concerned” parties were trying to redo a chimera using male subjects this time…

    I expect Justin’ reply to Shelly’s last question to be sadly a long one.

    • AvengerReloaded
      February 2, 2012, 12:55 pm | # | Reply

      Unlikely he’s a Golem since those cannot be hurt until they get a patch update and are rebooted.

      • Kessog
        February 2, 2012, 6:54 pm | #

        If he self-repairs then he can’t be made into a golem. Because even if he was mostly dead, he would still be slightly alive!

  23. david4250
    February 2, 2012, 3:19 am | # | Reply

    Here comes guardian Shellinx to the rescue, and Justin Thyme! What other amazing facts will be revealed to spice up the Wapsistew?
    Who knows? I certainly don’t. But why do we assume that Justin is immortal? He heals rapidly, yes, and it has caused him great physical, emotional, and psychological pain in the past, but none of that says he is immortal. Anything that can be physically injured can be killed, given enough effort.

    • Francisco
      February 2, 2012, 3:28 am | # | Reply

      I suspect that he’s mortal but he just can’t be killed (i.e. the only thing he can die of is old age).

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 3:33 am | # | Reply

      Telemeres!!!

      These are the measure of how many times your cells can divide before your DNA starts to degrade (causing old age).

      This is one reason why victims of chronic suffering from SERIOUS trauma (you know, trauma the body never quite heals, but continues to try) age so much quicker than other people.

      Justin is definitely describing repeated, massive trauma. Healing such would NOT continue if the telemeres were reduced (they are reduced by ANY mitosis like healing, not just aging)

      Part and parcel to ‘perfect healing’ like Justin’s is the lack of losing or maybe replacement of telemeres (something NOT done normally), so even aging is ‘damage to be healed’.

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 3:40 am | #

        oops, I just saw a flaw in my own theory…

        can anybody else tell me what happen in a body in which the cells continue to divide?

        hint: something Justin is definitely NOT.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 6:21 am | #

        That would be cancer.

        Rapid healing is paranormal, so I’d say we don’t know if he’s immortal or not. The ancient Western tradition ascribed that to gods (immortal); Christian tradition ascribes it to miracle (mortal): Prometheus cannot die, but Lazarus ultimately will.

        The part of St. Longinus’ hagiography of the 4th Century AD is effectively on the cusp of the two: He was torn apart by lions once a day and healed back by the next. But ultimately, was martyred.

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 9:44 am | #

        Well, the unfocused growth of cells (cancer) was an aspect I had overlooked.

        The flaw I saw was size. Unrestricted division of his cells would have made Justin a hell of a lot larger than he is depicted.

        It would explain his apparent muscle tone and strength, tho.

      • Ozymandous
        February 2, 2012, 10:23 am | #

        Interesting theory! However, just because cell’s divide doesn’t mean that both live to infinity. Justin’s healing could be that his body has the ability to replenish all of the tissue, including those that run the “healing process”.

        Essentially, the human body reaches maturity around age 25-27 and after that it’s all downhill until the end. If his body simply never stopped that growing phase, and in fact has mad some aspects maximally efficient (healing is simply regrowing cells at a fundamental level) that could be it.

        This would require no ‘extra’ powers or ability as most would ascribe to a paranormal. A good way to bring in something without it being OP and yet another super powerful being into an already crowded story-set.

      • illiad
        February 2, 2012, 6:28 am | #

        problem is, that is reality – Justin most likely has been augmented in a paranormal way – think wolverine, etc..
        – In RL, if it was just the healing process that was speeded up, he would soon become just one big lot of scar tissue!!
        -the whole skin would have to be replaced..

        oh, and cell duplication without control, in RL thats usually cancer.. 🙂

      • Fairportfan
        February 2, 2012, 9:08 am | #

        Wolverine’s healing is a natural part of his makeup. It’s his adamantium bones that are augmentatio.

    • Dave11
      February 2, 2012, 7:08 am | # | Reply

      *dumps 99% of coin jar into CoinStar Machine*
      *places coinstar slip in jar*
      *shakes pun jar at 4250*

      OK, now that that’s done: A lot of depictions of rapid healing show the person to:
      a) Feel the pain
      b) Heal *almost* instantly
      c) Be functionally immortal (won’t die of old age).

      However, anything that would instantly kill the person will drop them in their tracks. Think nerve gases.

      • W.
        February 2, 2012, 10:29 am | #

        Then there is the “eternal mercenary” who is a whole lotta more immortal.

      • Fairportfan
        February 2, 2012, 12:41 pm | #

        Moorcock’s “Eternal Champion”.

      • Leak
        February 2, 2012, 3:26 pm | #

        Kring’s “Cheerleader”

    • Analyst
      February 2, 2012, 10:03 am | # | Reply

      Although, if he were immortal, it would make a better match for Shelly’s 80,000 years.

  24. Francisco
    February 2, 2012, 3:27 am | # | Reply

    I wonder how he would feel when he learns that she stabbed Monica in the head?

    • Maark30
      February 3, 2012, 1:07 am | # | Reply

      That may not bother him if he meets Monica wen she is on one of her epic tears.

  25. Francisco
    February 2, 2012, 3:29 am | # | Reply

    I wonder if he was specifically created (or given the healing power) so that he could be used that way?

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 3:36 am | # | Reply

      ouch.

      THAT thought is beyond evil.

      wow.

      • Francisco
        February 2, 2012, 4:00 am | #

        Justin’s description of himself (in panel 4) reminded me of the Pleasure GELF in Red Dwarf.

        WARNING: Link contains spoilers.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 8:16 am | #

        That thought is the Problem of Evil. After all, we’re all like Justin, just to a lesser degree.

        If suffering is man’s lot, how can we dare think that the reason for our existence is benign? In monotheism, the Problem has to address omnibenevolence: how can an infinite god allow suffering, and not be considered evil?

        I.e. God must be getting off on our pain, since he doesn’t use his power to stop it. In old Western polytheism, this could be explained by indifference or interpersonal conflict scaled up to a cosmic level, instead of sheer malevolence. The Christian story became popular because it promised both understanding through the incarnation and an ultimate solution in eternal life after death.

        Of course, this has its shortcomings. Can you really trust the being with power over you as your guardian? Who is to check them if they do abuse this trust?

      • Swedish Chef
        February 2, 2012, 8:47 am | #

        As supernatural as Wapsi is, I don’t recall any monotheist tenet being spoken of. If anything, the setting is polytheist, this kind of means omnipotence is not possible. And omnibenevolence doesn’t imply omniscience either. The Problem, or Origin, of Evil requires all three before being layed out.

        Your premise precludes metempsychosis too; so no Buddhist/Hindu/Shinto. Wapsi!Minneapolis looks more international to me :).

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 9:48 am | #

        well, Jehovah also promised to allow ‘free choice’.

        This means he would NOT force us to do his will, he’d just ‘direct’ us with the tried and true ‘carrot and stick’.

        As mankind got better at applying ‘the stick’, the carrot tends to be overlooked.

      • bmonk
        February 2, 2012, 11:08 am | #

        Furthermore, it assumes that the Christian God is not doing something about the problem of evil. Rather, Christians believe that God did do something about evil–but that he also doesn’t want to just wipe out the flawed creatures, but sees something in them worth trying to save and heal.

        The argument against an all-knowing, all-powerful and all-loving God fails to consider just how loving God may be. It is possible that he could create a perfect “me”–but that wouldn’t really be me, now would it?

      • AvengerReloaded
        February 2, 2012, 1:25 pm | #

        Then there’s the church of an indifferent god. He may be omnipotent he’s just not all that interested in overseeing everyones day to day activities. Truth to tell he could care less what you choose to have for lunch, etc.

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 2:15 pm | #

        “CROM!!!”

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 2:17 pm | #

        “We apologize for the inconvenience.”

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 4:10 pm | #

        Google Crom™

    • Dusty668
      February 2, 2012, 5:24 am | # | Reply

      I kind of half remember an old SF novel or series that had such a race of created folks. Along with the healing their minds were wired to enjoy pain and sensing the rage that their pain inflictiors felt while they did it.
      The only way to hurt them or kill them was to feel positive or loving emotions to them.
      I couldn’t finish the story.

      • Boxilar
        February 2, 2012, 11:09 am | #

        It speaks well of your humanity that you couldn’t.

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 2:18 pm | #

        Unngh. Yeah. If I learned of something like that in the real world, I think I’d want to start hunting up an asteroid to drop on the homeworld of the species that did the inventing.

  26. Robert Waldhans
    February 2, 2012, 3:31 am | # | Reply

    So. The plot thickens. And from his description about himself i would like to make a Bet that he is Prometheus. That immortal guy chained to a rock and an eagle eating his liver on a daily schedule… and everything heals back at night…

  27. jae
    February 2, 2012, 4:11 am | # | Reply

    Hmm, looking through the comments so far (I may have missed it), no-one asked the question:

    What or who *is* Justin?

    • Misterkami
      February 2, 2012, 4:38 am | # | Reply

      Yeah, I missed that too. Seems to me it’s quite an important question..
      Plus; doesn’t anyone find it a little farfetched that quite a number of characters just happen to have a higly paranormal background or convenient powers out of the blue?
      I’m kinda expecting it from all the other human characters too now

      • NOTDilbert
        February 2, 2012, 11:16 pm | #

        True, a grouping like that would be a million-to-one occurence.
        But, then, million-to-one shots crop up nine times out of ten….

    • The Old Wolf
      February 2, 2012, 5:09 am | # | Reply

      Stay tuned, we’ll be right back after this brief cliffhanger!

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 7:05 am | #

        Dave and I were musing about it yesterday.

        I had said that Longinus would be a good twist– and the crazy chicks were the ones who enjoyed abusing him. But he called Shelly “crazy AND delusional” because she thought being a sphinx would make things better between them.

        Today, I’m thinking the “but I’m a guardian sphinx” is a set up to reveal that it’s the apos taking the most delight in torturing him. “Apotropaic” = “guardian”, Shellster. You’re not like them– stop putting your paw in your mouth!

        Hopefully Justin has fully absorbed the lesson that Shelly didn’t understand.

        And now I’m afraid Shelly’s lack of control may stem from an instinct to treat him like a chew toy. And taking him to the Library would be like dropping a catnip ball marked APO PREY. This is gonna be hard.

      • Fairportfan
        February 2, 2012, 9:15 am | #

        Phis is not an apo.

      • Fairportfan
        February 2, 2012, 12:40 pm | #

        argh. “Phix”

        There. Fixed it.

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 10:37 am | #

        I interpret the in-context meaning of the adjectives Justin used, and his reason for using them, a bit differently.

        “Crazy”: You think in irrational ways. You act in abnormal, unpredictable ways. Your behavior is far outside of social norms. You don’t care who you hurt. I can’t trust you and am not safe around you. You are an absolute loose cannon.

        This was the first adjective Justin used against Shelly, and I believe he meant it with all of his heart. “Crazy” is his personal code-word for “all that paranormal stuff which has hurt me so badly.”

        Now, “delusional”: you believe in the reality of something which is unreal.

        Actually, I don’t think Justin actually believed this about Shelly when he said it. I think he probably knew she was telling the truth. Calling her “delusional” was just another part of his verbal defense, to justify why he was walking out on her.

        Given his situation and his desire to avoid any further contact with the paranormal, he had to reject her explanation, even if he knew it was probably true. Asking “What do you mean, a sphinx?” would just result in his getting sucked back into further explanations and discussion of the paranormal.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 2:14 pm | #

        Fully willing to see where Paul goes with it. Considering Shelly’s last line here, we may soon find out Justin’s specific feelings about sphinxes.

        Hey, maybe he honestly doesn’t know the difference between a gryphon and a sphinx. “Why bother? They all dive on me out of the sky, and rend me to bits while laughing.” It’s not like he can call animal control, or that the Monster Manual is going to give him any comfort…

      • Maark30
        February 2, 2012, 11:00 pm | #

        The Apos were not guardians, they were enforcers. They enforced the laws governing the actions of demons. An important difference.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 3, 2012, 12:36 am | #

        Given that different types of sphinxes seem to “feel” they are meant to be certain things, Guardians, Enforcers, and the like, I see mounting evidence that all of them were, at some point, created specifically for their tasks. Either directly in genetic engineering, or by selective breeding. Untold ages ago, some beings made the originals to suit certain purposes in the grand scheme of things. Occasionally, some, like Phix, deviate somewhat from their purpose, but not entirely.

    • illiad
      February 2, 2012, 6:35 am | # | Reply

      heh, only Pablo knows… 🙂 🙂

      But feel free to speculate like the rest of us!! 😀

    • jwhouk
      February 2, 2012, 9:20 am | # | Reply

      My money’s on him being an “altered human” – kinda like how M got her poiting ability. He ran into some Lanthian-type “mythological creatures” who had the ability to heal with a touch – and, like Monica, he picked up on the “technology”.

      • NOTDilbert
        February 2, 2012, 11:18 pm | #

        Lanthian nanites.

    • Uberpetty
      February 2, 2012, 12:34 pm | # | Reply

      I think Justin might be a product of a previous love interest Phix had with a human.

      Would explain why he was not freaked out by being flown around by a sphinx.

      Just my hunch, I’m sure it’s a dead end.

  28. Fairportfan
    February 2, 2012, 5:29 am | # | Reply

    Sounds as if Justin’s known some not-nice people.

  29. Bucc-i
    February 2, 2012, 5:30 am | # | Reply

    So you mean to tell me that Justin is actually… Wolverine!

    Does anyone else want to join me on the Confusion Couch?

    • illiad
      February 2, 2012, 6:37 am | # | Reply

      definitely not… unless he is his more inhibited younger brother…

    • eee
      February 2, 2012, 10:10 pm | # | Reply

      People keep saying Wolverine. What about Dorian Gray? 🙂

  30. Sheik
    February 2, 2012, 6:11 am | # | Reply

    These two have a lot in common.
    If their politics match up we could hear wedding bells.

  31. Dave11
    February 2, 2012, 7:12 am | # | Reply

    I certainly didn’t see that coming.

    Shelly, Shelly, Shelly…”Guardian Sphinx” doesn’t necessarily mean you guard people.

    *abandons five-point restraint in favor of incompressible water tank for high-g accelerations*

    • Yamara
      February 2, 2012, 2:44 pm | # | Reply

      Look, it’s a complicated job.

  32. Alex
    February 2, 2012, 7:48 am | # | Reply

    Probably less Wolverine, more Super-Subdued-Probably-Non-Pansexual Captain Jack Harkness.

  33. GrumbleBear
    February 2, 2012, 7:54 am | # | Reply

    Just a wild thought; might Justin have been one of those guards Jin sliced up(in a flashback strip some time ago? I can’t remember the correct strip.)

    Both Jin & Brandi have done quite a bit of manipulation as the cycle repeated itself over & over. Justin may just be fated to be involved with Shelly.(Or maybe, someone was trying to keep them apart and they got together anyway!)

    There is no way Justin could’ve been “normal” and this relationship would’ve had a chance. Monica’s & Jin’s significant others have taken things in stride. Maybe they have have hidden secrets even *they* didn’t know about.

    • Francisco
      February 2, 2012, 11:53 am | # | Reply

      It was May who sliced the guards.

      • Maark30
        February 2, 2012, 11:04 pm | #

        Sorry it was Jin, and their boss was the boyfriend that turned on her and threw her into the pit.

  34. as363
    February 2, 2012, 8:23 am | # | Reply

    Hmmm..Wonder what Ms Harrington would do about this .

  35. ohnhai
    February 2, 2012, 8:42 am | # | Reply

    do OTB and Phix have history?

    • Yamara
      February 2, 2012, 8:55 am | # | Reply

      Phix plainly has more refined tastes than, well, torture porn.

      The apos… why, Paul has shown us any of them yet.

      I am guessing “don’t get between an apo and their prey” has already applied to Justin.

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 10:16 am | #

        AFAIK, Paul has not shown us any Apos.

        The thing is, according to indian myth, Apo-sphinxes were more than just the disciplinarians of the entire ‘sphinx line…

        They were also predator.

  36. Aleister Crow
    February 2, 2012, 9:04 am | # | Reply

    Okay, good. Keep talking, kids.

    Shelley, tell him about how you found out about being a sphinx recently, and you still struggling to get a handle on it…

    Justin, tell her all about you harrowing escape from that secret Canadian military lab where they tried to give you a metal skeleton and claws…

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 10:08 am | # | Reply

      well, the alpha program did NOT put claws into Logan (he was born with them and didn’t know it).

      The program DID lace his entire skeleton (including the claws) with a supposedly indestructible metal (it was noted during the ‘saturation’ an inordinate amount of metal was going to his forearms).

  37. Atomic
    February 2, 2012, 9:11 am | # | Reply

    Options so far:

    a – Immortal being without any other enhancements.
    b – Cursed being, such as Longius, doomed to wander the earth
    c – Special being, such as Achilles, having received a blessing
    d – Manufactured being (think Suicide Cow at Restaurant at the End of the Universe) now out on his own
    e – Demigod of some stripe (a’la Heracles) surppressing his other powers to try and fit in
    f – Other Imp, Incubus, or similar with small (or surpressed) skill set and trying to be human
    g – Space alien [obvious Wapisverse theme violation, but needed to be mentioned]
    h – Other supernatural being of some stripe (Nordic perhaps?)

    • jwhouk
      February 2, 2012, 9:22 am | # | Reply

      I’ll go with C for the block, Pat.

    • bmonk
      February 2, 2012, 11:10 am | # | Reply

      Various regenerative creatures, of whom trolls come to mind.

    • Francisco
      February 2, 2012, 12:06 pm | # | Reply

      I think it’s C or D.

      • jae
        February 2, 2012, 8:38 pm | #

        C or D is okay, C&Ds suck…

    • AvengerReloaded
      February 2, 2012, 1:36 pm | # | Reply

      H – (Adrian Paul?) aka Highlander

      • Sheik
        February 2, 2012, 6:54 pm | #

        That would be g.

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 11:11 pm | #

        A Highlander-style Immortal is only a space alien if you accept the second movie (non-Renegade version) as canon. A lot of Highlander fans consider that particular bit of celluloid to be about as welcome as Jar Jar Binks.

        In the rest of that sheaf of continuities, the origins of the Immortals is left as a mystery, either implicitly or explicitly.

    • Yamara
      February 2, 2012, 10:02 pm | # | Reply

      B or C — with a wild card that he’s a total mystery unto himself

    • SoWhyMe
      February 2, 2012, 11:55 pm | # | Reply

      There is always the “has no clue of what he is or how he got that way.” he just “is.”

    • scantrontb
      February 3, 2012, 1:26 am | # | Reply

      G is not necessarily exempt… the V-Cell Barrier is for keeping out extra-DIMENSIONAL Poiters… if the Aliens arrived via star-ship, then I’ll bet the Barrier won’t do squat to keep them out.

  38. Fairportfan
    February 2, 2012, 9:13 am | # | Reply

    Ya know – Justin’s line about being like a fetish object to “psycho chicks and mythical creatures” is interesting; it can be read to imply that the “psycho chicks” and the “mythical creatures” are not necessarily the same persons…

    • Ball-Bearing Mousetrap
      February 2, 2012, 11:32 pm | # | Reply

      Hm. Valid point. Wonder if it’s just that, being able to physically heal, he’s been more forgiving, and less willing to run and risk hurting the other person’s feelings, than most .. ahem.. sane humans would be, and thus has gotten stuck with more of the weird and the weird.

      Self-preservation is a learned skill…

  39. TlalocW
    February 2, 2012, 9:27 am | # | Reply

    This is like, “My Blue Heaven,” with Steve Martin, where the FBI keeps putting mafiosos into the same town under the Witness Protection Program, and they find each other. But for some reason, all these different supernatural types head to Minnesota for different reasons. Most of them are there one way or another because of a link to Monica, but it’s gotta suck for Justin especially if he thought to himself, “Minnesota… I’ll be able to start over in Minnesota,” before moving there.

    • jwhouk
      February 2, 2012, 11:55 pm | # | Reply

      Better Minnesota than Wisconsin, I’d reckon. 😉

      • Maark30
        February 3, 2012, 1:18 am | #

        Could always go to Key West with the patrons and staff of the Crosstime Saloon.

  40. TlalocW
    February 2, 2012, 9:28 am | # | Reply

    I’d also like to say, we’ve got our human shield for our upper-Midwest superteam.

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 9:55 am | # | Reply

      Not like any of them need a shield from physical harm; but they do need a PR or HR manager.

      • Valkeiper
        February 2, 2012, 10:10 am | #

        and Tina would be the team psychosis… whoops, psychiatrist.

      • AvengerReloaded
        February 2, 2012, 1:39 pm | #

        I keep thinking of Poor Ezri Dax upon being assigned as Psychologist of DS9.
        “You’re responsible for the mental well being of this crew.”
        “Is that an assignment or an accusation sir?”

      • Dave
        February 2, 2012, 2:22 pm | #

        Ezri has more than a bit in common with Shelly, doesn’t she? Suddenly taking on a burden of multiple lifetimes of experience and history, and a whole “second nature”, while still quite young and trying to figure herself out as a person. In over her head, and having to deal with manifestations of her “other self” without proper training and preparation.

  41. Boxilar
    February 2, 2012, 9:52 am | # | Reply

    Wow. Came in from work this morning and read the strip. Then re-read it. Then I read the comments. I did not see this coming. I think Justin is probably the most damaged person in the story with the exception of the golem girls, and they have the comfort of knowing thier tormentors can never hurt them again, or that no else one can hurt them, ever.

    Justin’s reaction right after the slash of “Don’t touch me,” is painful now. The rage he showed was the rage of betrayal. He has been used and abused in dreadful ways and his reaction was that of someone who has suffered deep physical and emotional trama. Maybe I’m overstating it, but his reaction to her then seems similar to the reaction a rape victim would have when they found out someone they had grown to care for had suddenly revealed themself to be a rapist.

    Please note that I am not attempting to paint Shelly in this light. But if you look at Justin’s posture of resignation, it’s clear he expects the cycle of abuse to start all over again. It is to Shelly’s credit that she can’t quite fathom the evil of what was done to him or the evil of those who did it.

    I do want to see the moment when she meets one of these indivduals. Sphinxes are the apex predators of the Wapsiverse and while Shelly is a young Sphinx, she is still a Sphinx. Short of the Golem Girls and Tina, I doubt there is any non-Sphinx that could stand against her.

    • Valkeiper
      February 2, 2012, 10:00 am | # | Reply

      Maybe the Golem girls and Monica; but i doubt Tina stands much of a chance.

      Tina is a collection of demons and they were scared s***less of Phix.

      Of course, Shelly is not Phix; but if she were protecting Justin (or somebody else she thought needed protecting), I doubt the difference would be notable to her target.

      MEGA-OUCH

      • Boxilar
        February 2, 2012, 10:11 am | #

        I included Tina because of this,
        http://wapsisquare.com/comic/we-know/
        That’s presuming she was telling the truth.

        But, yeah. Shelly may be the littlest Sphinx, but a small lioness is still a lioness. You can be the baddest mouse that ever lived and to that lioness you’re still just a light snack.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 12:21 pm | #

        One wonders how Reepicheep would handle this.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 1:20 pm | #

        Sorry; my Reepicheep joke was a bit flip for this thread.

        Boxilar is right that Justin has been horribly abused– and that really came out in Paul’s art the Monday before. His portrayals of darkness have either been very clean, or very spooky. This was his first use of genuine unbridled, unbowlderized rage, and it was drawn with such forcefulness as to warp his very style. I knew this would have a deeper meaning, but it was uglier than I had guessed.

        (Dave, I’m not trying to single you out, but–) Folks, I’m going to have to defend Ari on one salient point, and that’s that she is coming from a very honest place in detesting the character. It’s not that there cannot be found good reasons to be on Team Justin. The point is that those images from Monday-before evoke situations from reality that are far removed from a cartoon fable about a wronged Osiris and a confused sphinx.

        In the real world, right now, somewhere every few seconds, that scene is occurring between a man with thin skin and a woman who’s done little to deserve her tears. The genders are not reversed or identical anywhere near as often. The events do not end with rapid healing, and the conversations do not swiftly resolve towards a sympathetic mutual understanding.

        They end with actual people bruised, in hospital, with genuine PTSD, or other very permanent destinations. For survivors, the memories are crystalline, and evoking their natures trigger them in all their horror.

        Ari is allowed her revulsion.

        .

        …Back in cartoonland? Shelly, please find out who these merry fangirls are… and bring them before your judgement.

      • AvengerReloaded
        February 2, 2012, 1:52 pm | #

        No, Miss Yamara, you read my mind. (Get out of there it’s awfuly dark in there.) In any case thanks to my kid I am also going to throw in Martin the warrior of Redwall for good measure.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 2, 2012, 3:16 pm | #

        Geeze, Yamara, you never miss an opportunity to bring that crap up, thereby bringing the group down, do you? Change the cd, that song has gotten tiresome.

        If you’re not going to, then don’t complain if I bring up the evil of females. I’ve had to sit on my hands many times to avoid raising those issues, I suggest you consider doing the same.

      • Yamara
        February 2, 2012, 9:40 pm | #

        It’s a centuries-old musical category, not a cd. Though I beg your pardon for leaving the toner arm up.

        And if women are giving you a problem while you’re alone at your computer, I recommend scotch.

      • SoWhyMe
        February 3, 2012, 12:11 am | #

        No, women never give me problems now. I’m protected from them. At least physically.

        Tell you what, let’s just ALL pour out our pet issues at every opportunity. That should make the comments section ever so much more interesting. Heck, let’s throw in politics and religion as well. Make this place just like all the rest.

      • Seanette
        February 2, 2012, 4:13 pm | #

        Can we say ?

      • Seanette
        February 2, 2012, 4:14 pm | #

        Apparently, my attempt to link the trope page for Violently Protective Girlfriend (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ViolentlyProtectiveGirlFriend) utterly failed. Sorry.

      • david4250
        February 2, 2012, 4:13 pm | #

        Tina wasn’t too happy to see Shelly when she returned from the Forest, either.

    • Ozymandous
      February 2, 2012, 10:30 am | # | Reply

      Great reply! Perhaps the best summation of how I’ve seen this whole situation based on the last few days worth of comics as well. I think this is the best explaination of how normal his reaction is overall:

      “Justin’s reaction right after the slash of “Don’t touch me,” is painful now. The rage he showed was the rage of betrayal. He has been used and abused in dreadful ways and his reaction was that of someone who has suffered deep physical and emotional trama. Maybe I’m overstating it, but his reaction to her then seems similar to the reaction a rape victim would have when they found out someone they had grown to care for had suddenly revealed themself to be a rapist. ”

      Exactly! As you say, not to imply that Shelly is a rapist, but Justin would feel instantly betrayed, saddened and likely angry that he let himself get into this situation again. That he had trusted Shelly to not be a “psycho/crazy chick” who would hurt him, and she said she wouldn’t. Then she did.. Accident or no.

      • fallconskat
        February 3, 2012, 2:05 am | #

        you know…i have a wonderful TheEngineer, who adores me with all his heart. the most angry he’s ever gotten with me was over a misunderstanding, and even THEN, once we got our communication uncrossed that was *it*. argument over, peace proclaimed.

        and i still cringe if he raises his voice on the phone with someone else. eighteen years in an abusive home, ten years of an abusive marriage that ended twenty years ago, and i still cringe.

        those reactions get bone-deep…and justin (like or loathe him) has had a long time to “know” that certain things are going to happen, whether or not its what actually WILL happen. maybe he’ll heal. maybe he wont. maybe he’ll find that shelly is a better friend to him than his own mind is.

        but until he unwraps himself (cause i see how his arms are trying to protect himself, still) he isnt going to find out.

    • Dave
      February 2, 2012, 10:51 am | # | Reply

      I think you’re right about his level of damage. Owwie for sure!

      One good thing: so far, we’ve seen no evidence that Justin has moved from being the abused, to being a deliberate abuser, as some victims of abuse do. No, Ari, I don’t see his yelling at Shelly in that way. Justin is wounded and damaged, but I don’t think he’s irreparably broken.

      For some reason, Justin and his damage/wounding remind me a lot of Brandi and what happened to her in the Lanthian nursery. It my be just that both have recently have had big reveals and disclosed some deeply-rooted pain… but it feels like a closer parallel than that. Brandi’s quiet, keep-it-hidden reaction to what happened, seems closer to Justin’s path than how Bud and Jin have dealt with their history over the years.

      • Boxilar
        February 2, 2012, 11:14 am | #

        I think a conversation between Justin and Brandi would do them both a world of good. I think they have the same level of self loathing.

  42. Valkeiper
    February 2, 2012, 10:19 am | # | Reply

    good thing you said “mouse” and not “rodent”.

    There’s a couple rodent species (in RL and in mythology) that would give a young lioness (even a winged one) plenty to think about.

    • Boxilar
      February 2, 2012, 10:46 am | # | Reply

      Real life capybaras go nearly 100lbs. They’re the biggest RW rodents I know of. They are essentialy giant guinea pigs. I think jaguars love to eat them when they can. There are, as you say, smaller species of rodent that are far more vicious.

      On the myth side, there’s all sorts of things to chose from, but my mind keeps going back to giant rodents with a wierd fixation with baking thier victims into a nice quice.

      Stupid, stupid rat creatures.

      • Casey
        February 2, 2012, 12:15 pm | #

        Beware of ROUS’s (Rodents of unusual size)

      • bmonk
        February 2, 2012, 12:38 pm | #

        Nah, no problem. Just wait for the clicking and throw them onto the hole just before it erupts.

      • Hansontoons
        February 2, 2012, 9:08 pm | #

        Or Giant Rats of Sumatra…

  43. jenn
    February 2, 2012, 10:49 am | # | Reply

    Aw, hells. No wonder he’s a cop. And I’ll bet a damn good one.

  44. Sonicthunder
    February 2, 2012, 11:01 am | # | Reply

    Actually, this makes Justin the perfect training toy for young Sphinxes.

    “Here guard this.”
    “Oops. I killed it.”
    “It’s ok, it’ll fix itself. Now, try again.”
    “Yay! 537th time’s the charm!”

    • Francisco
      February 2, 2012, 12:01 pm | # | Reply

      That would be abusing him just as the others did.

      Anyway, I get the strong impression that their desire and ability to protect is instinctive. The only thing they need training on is when not to react.

  45. yuffiek
    February 2, 2012, 11:54 am | # | Reply

    Actually, look back at the Chekov’s armory…

    Justin met Shelly after she firebombed her grill…
    She handcuffed him to the bed, more than once I believe…

    And now he has his chest torn open and miraculously heals from it…

    The man is the modern Prometheus…

    • Atomic
      February 2, 2012, 1:55 pm | # | Reply

      Prometheus! Hadn’t though of that one. We’ll know if some eagles start following him around.

      • david4250
        February 2, 2012, 4:05 pm | #

        Well, Shellinx is part eagle…

    • Maark30
      February 3, 2012, 1:23 am | # | Reply

      modern Prometheus? Hmmm well that was written by Mary SHELLY after all. Coincidence or not?

  46. WilliamCA
    February 2, 2012, 1:29 pm | # | Reply

    So he’s like wolverine…jeez. Oh K i call BS..sort of. But seriously though this is interesting. He has supernatural abilities as well. I have to admit i think this is better solution then the usual guy just accepting his woman has supernatural powers. Paul has already done that twice.

    • SoWhyMe
      February 2, 2012, 3:28 pm | # | Reply

      Not quite. Wolverine can defend himself and give as good as he gets. I saw a clip of him killing another being like himself even. I wonder if Shelly has the same weakness all the big cats have? A soft belly. They do everything they can to protect that area in a fight. So if you’re ever in a fight with one and have a big knife, go right for it, if you can.

  47. Danzier
    February 2, 2012, 1:49 pm | # | Reply

    So… Justin didn’t realize that Shelly is trying to be normal, because he’s too wrapped up in his own attempt? That can get really, really dangerous.

    • Dave
      February 2, 2012, 2:30 pm | # | Reply

      Yeah, they haven’t been communicating well, or even really seeing one another with open eyes… as Shelly’s comment a couple of days ago acknowledges.

      As a friend of mine would put it, Justin is a “basket of snakes”. It feels as if he’s been so traumatized by whatever happened before, that he’s been acting almost reflexively with respect to the paranormal.

      His reaction is almost an exact emotional counterpart to Shelly’s physical strike-out reaction when swatted. He’s been an emotional bomb, waiting to be triggered… just as Shelly has been a violence bomb waiting to be triggered.

      What we’ve seen in the past couple of weeks, was one hell of a double-shot Earth Shattering Kaboom.

      With luck (and it will take both luck and hard work) the wound-up spring tension has been released, actual communication has started, and maybe they’ll be able to work things out… or at least part amicably.

      • Boxilar
        February 2, 2012, 6:55 pm | #

        I’ll point out that Shelly’s communication skills have suffered due to her 80k years of isolation. Under normal curcumstances, she’s operating off her pre forrest knowledge and skillset. When she get stressed, she reverts, both physicaly and mentaly to Shellinix. And Shellinix’s communication was mostly with other Sphinxes who at best talked in riddles (I learned as much from her silence as from her words) and at worst wanted to hurt her. And she had GLG to keep her company, but GLG knows her mind and Shelly dosen’t have to explain her thought process to her.

        I think this is the reason for Shellys disjointed stream of conciousness under stress in this story arc.

  48. Valkeiper
    February 2, 2012, 2:28 pm | # | Reply

    dangerous is a woman throwing a golf ball at the ground in Minneapolis, USA so hard it almost sinks a gondola in Venice, Italy.

    Justin and Shelly are on a completely different path of threat management.

  49. NOTDilbert
    February 2, 2012, 7:18 pm | # | Reply

    Yay! They’re talking!

  50. Ball-Bearing Mousetrap
    February 2, 2012, 11:56 pm | # | Reply

    Shelly is still not fully under control. She’s previously expressed real fears that if she slips she could hurt Justin.

    Now it turns out he’s one of the folks who might actually be safe around her even if she does overreact.

    The question is, does he care enough about her to risk it… which may come down to whether he believes she’s willing to put herself on the line to protect him and to avoid calling in that promise.

    Might not be a bad idea for Justin to talk to some of the folks who know Shelly on this level and can tell him both what she’s going through and that _they’re_ sure she won’t take advantage of him (or at least, not more than briefly and in a normal-balanced-relationship manner). Introduce him to some mythical creatures who aren’t psycho… well, at least who aren’t malign… so he has a bit more perspective on that front.

    A deep friendship always requires learning to relax your defenses and learn to trust — and to apologize sincerely, and to forgive, when accidents or necessities put a strain on that. It’s just rather amped up for these two.

    Given the storytelling style, I expect this will work out. They both need someone they can trust, and who can trust them. That may or may not be a lifetime love interest, but it could be a lifetime friendship at least, and those are good too.

    As Fred Small put it, in the intro to his song about the moose and cow, “All relationships are mixed relationships.” The fear and the joy is in finding someone you can mix well with, and learning how to do so.

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