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"You Are What You Eat"
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You Are What You Eat
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Latest Medusa Comic

You Are What You Eat

by Paul Taylor on March 15, 2012 at 12:00 am
Story: Wapsi-Archive
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Discussion (102) ¬

  1. DJ
    March 15, 2012, 1:39 am | # | Reply

    Damn. Now I want some medicine.

    • Atomic
      March 15, 2012, 9:03 am | # | Reply

      Somehow, I suspect this will not turn out well. Either.

      • Ditzite
        March 15, 2012, 3:59 pm | #

        Sun burn on top of rug and thermal burns?

  2. Jim
    March 15, 2012, 1:39 am | # | Reply

    Que?

    • Sitnalta
      March 15, 2012, 5:09 am | # | Reply

      Somos lo que comemos.

      We are what we eat.

      • Lee M
        March 15, 2012, 8:20 am | #

        “Young man says, you are what you eat, eat well
        Old man says you are what you wear, wear well…
        Selling England by the pound.”

      • bmonk
        March 15, 2012, 10:32 am | #

        “You are what you eat” for sure–only it doesn’t look like they are eating much at all just now.

      • Maark30
        March 15, 2012, 11:18 am | #

        Maybe that is the point.

  3. Casey
    March 15, 2012, 1:42 am | # | Reply

    Hopefully this one doesn’t have the same explosive temper as the last one.

    • waldosan
      March 15, 2012, 3:01 am | # | Reply

      i predict a tsunami in the near future…

      • Dave
        March 15, 2012, 8:45 am | #

        Or a visit from a flock of irritated local residents, as in Mel Brooks’ “High Anxiety” takeoff on Hitchcock’s “The Birds”

  4. The Old Wolf
    March 15, 2012, 1:46 am | # | Reply

    “Shit-faced” doesn’t even begin to do this pair justice. (Excuse my French!) 😛

    • DJ
      March 15, 2012, 1:55 am | # | Reply

      They’ve been that drunk together before.

      • Sonicthunder
        March 15, 2012, 6:35 am | #

        Thankfully, they’ve yet to install bathroom mirrors on that island.

        … I hope.

    • TheDoctor
      March 15, 2012, 7:45 am | # | Reply

      You are excused,sir. You said what I was thinking when I first read this today.

    • Rowan Hawthorn
      March 15, 2012, 7:54 am | # | Reply

      Okay, but I thought that was Anglo-Saxon…

      • kermit
        March 15, 2012, 9:15 am | #

        English speakers have a long tradition of saying “Pardon my French” when they say something rude in old English. I think it’s one last, feeble arrow aimed at the Norman invaders.

      • The Old Wolf
        March 15, 2012, 10:29 am | #

        Oh yes. Another holdover is “taking French leave”, meaning to go AWOL. Interestingly enough, the French call it “filer à l’anglaise”, or to flee like an Englishman. Language is fun…

      • Valkeiper
        March 15, 2012, 1:53 pm | #

        Language is indeed fun. I have talked with many translators and interpreters through the years and they enjoy the ‘slight’ misunderstandings cliches can cause.

        They have ALL said two things about english, though…

        1> it is THE most difficult non-native spoken language to learn
        2> it is the most fun language to speak… though some other languages sound more ‘musical’ to the untrained ear.

      • bmonk
        March 15, 2012, 2:18 pm | #

        And let us not get into all the names for diseases, especially names for former epidemics, like the “Spanish flu” . . .

    • Shonkin
      March 15, 2012, 4:21 pm | # | Reply

      At least the “Spanish flu” was an innocent term and not a slur on the Spanish.
      During WWI, the belligerents (UK, Germany, France, USA, Austria-Hungary, etc.) all had the grippe, and soldiers were dying like flies in the trenches. They all kept it a deerp dark military secret. Spain, however, was a neutral country, and the Spanish papers were full of reports on the killer disease they called “the influence.”
      Americans called it the Spanish influenza because Spain was the first country to report it.
      It’s not a bit like “the French disease” or “the English disease” (AKA V.D.). Or Dutch courage, for that matter.

      • BarerMender
        February 23, 2016, 6:38 am | #

        It’s now known it started on a chicken farm in Kansas. You can even find out which one, if you’re interested enough.

  5. Opus the Poet
    March 15, 2012, 1:50 am | # | Reply

    Is that M losing her English when she gets drunk? I don’t recall that from before, she always continued to speak perfect if slurred English even when sloshed to near unconsciousness (or up to the point of unconsciousness).

    • Kramegame
      March 15, 2012, 7:38 am | # | Reply

      must be the Island air, brings out all sorts of weird behaviors. My last trip down to Dominican Republic turned me into a full blown drunk for a week. Best vacation of my life, even if I don’t remember it…

      • bmonk
        March 15, 2012, 10:38 am | #

        Or else maybe her tongue also got caught in Island Primo’s final blast?

  6. W00KY
    March 15, 2012, 1:50 am | # | Reply

    Drunken Poiting……I fear that this will end as well as their first trip. And the hangover will be epic!

    Also: why did no one stop them? It seems a bit irresponsible to let them continue poiting around.

    • Ari
      March 15, 2012, 1:55 am | # | Reply

      Good point although, how does one stop them? Take their keys away?

      • scantrontb
        March 15, 2012, 9:37 pm | #

        I’m sure Brandi could tell you how to do it… or you an look it up in The Library. 😀

    • tygertyger
      March 16, 2012, 9:43 am | # | Reply

      It’s better than drunken math. No one should drink and derive.

      [places stock portfolio in pun vault]

  7. WilliamCA
    March 15, 2012, 1:50 am | # | Reply

    LOL!! Back at it again eh? These girls do not know when to quit! I love it!

  8. Dave
    March 15, 2012, 1:56 am | # | Reply

    “Medicatamipated”??

    Can somebody who speaks fluent BombedOutOfOurSkulls please break that word down into its roots for me? The “medicated” part makes sense, but I get lost after that. I don’t think it’s from Greek, Latin, or French… possibly Flasque?

    I foresee another episode of “The light burns, the birds are shrieking, and the skin on my skull has shrunk three sizes overnight”. A red wine hangover on top of bruises and abrasions and strains and sprains is not going to be fun, no it is not.

    Oh well… you only live once… well, a few thousand times at most.

    • DJ
      March 15, 2012, 1:58 am | # | Reply

      Medically incapacitated?

      • Rowan Hawthorn
        March 15, 2012, 7:57 am | #

        1 TBSP Medicated
        2 TSP Contaminated
        1/2 cup Incapacitated.
        Blend well, and serve in a cold glass.
        WEEEEEEEEEE!!!

      • Lee M
        March 15, 2012, 8:24 am | #

        See Lewis Carroll’s introduction to “The Hunting of the Snark” for an explanation of how somebody with a *perfectly balanced mind* will run words together rather than having to choose between one or t’other.

      • Atomic
        March 15, 2012, 9:09 am | #

        Long ago I had a college course in Psycholinguistics – the science of how speech is formed. It seems we create the idea of what we want to say first, then build a emotion and emphasis pattern for the concept, and adding the actual words is toward the end of the chain. That’s where transpositions, juxtapositions and blended words come from!

        I’m not as think as you drunk I am!
        Bliney lilttle turds.
        Etc.

      • bmonk
        March 15, 2012, 12:06 pm | #

        The Monty Python Film Producer sketch had a similar result:

        “Are you being indecisive?”

        “Yo. Nes. Perhaps.”

      • Julie
        March 15, 2012, 8:53 am | #

        Brilliant! 🙂

      • Dave
        March 15, 2012, 9:26 am | #

        Very nice indeed – thank you for the explanation!

        Though I might suggest a variation… rather than “blend well”, how about “stir well with a large Spoonerism”?

      • Prester Fred
        March 15, 2012, 9:42 am | #

        Ouch! That was…jarring.

        (okay, okay, grumble, grumble, clink clink)

      • Dafydd
        March 15, 2012, 11:46 am | #

        Nah, there’s no spoonerism there, and those two are definitely well blended.

      • bmonk
        March 15, 2012, 2:35 pm | #

        You left me shaken, not stirred.

        [tosses in the keys to a Jaguar, highly modified, no longer extant.]

      • Dave
        March 15, 2012, 2:54 pm | #

        Oh, I guess we’re bonding now, on the subject of alcohol?

        (*clink*)

    • WitUnderPressure
      July 6, 2012, 6:42 pm | # | Reply

      @ Dave: looked up the word on yahoo, only link was to this page and specifically this comment

  9. Jay-Em
    March 15, 2012, 2:14 am | # | Reply

    “You are what You eat” and on that note:
    I think that I know how a clay jar can eat and drink, without a digestive tract to speak of.

    They are “living” fusion reactors! It explains Bud’s plasma burps. It also explains their awesome power. They can convert EVERY bit of mass into power. Which is a good thing, since it took all energy of a rotating galaxy to jump-start Jin to “just” human-like existence. Imagine what it would take to keep them running at their enhanced power-levels.

    The drunk bit, I have no explanation for yet.. but I’ll find something. “Magic”is a bit too unspecific for me.

    • My2Cents
      March 15, 2012, 2:31 am | # | Reply

      Why a fusion reactor?

      How about a small black hole. Feed the matter in tangentially and you get about 3% back out in the polar jets as pure energy. Much higher conversion ratio, and it is not picky about what you feed it, unlike a fusion reactor.

      • GreyWolf
        March 16, 2012, 1:16 am | #

        But fusion reactors aren’t that picky! A Mr. Fusion micro unit takes banana peels, half-filled cans of beer … ::snicker::

    • Dave
      March 15, 2012, 2:34 am | # | Reply

      My own hunch is that the golemization process somehow involved building a functional replica of the GGs’ own nervous systems into their clay-golem forms. If what was wanted, was a golem form which could accurately reproduce or emulate the behavior of a living human, it’d probably be easier to somehow replicate an existing person’s neural structure rather than to design a whole new “mental processing” system from scratch. Doubly so, if you wanted to carry over memories and a personality. Some AI research has worked along those lines… develop an electronic analog for a brain and sensory system, and see if complex behaviors and perhaps even consciousness can be persuaded to appear as emergent phenomena.

      The more accurately you build/programmed this replica nervous system, the more similar the golem’s reaction to stimuli would be, compared to the original human. So, developing a mimic nervous system which would require or implement sleep, sensitivity to alcohol and caffeine, etc. might be the best way to ensure a “good fit” between original donor personality and golem form. It might (less charitably) have been for the benefit of the golem’s “owners” (e.g. the Lanthian priests), making the golems easier to control?

      • The O.K. TV Set
        March 15, 2012, 3:02 am | #

        I saw a wizard leaving a little while ago, I think Paul hired him to do it.

      • illiad
        March 15, 2012, 3:07 am | #

        waitamo….. golemisation ( by other sources) will only produce a basic “robot” ..
        the GGG when created, where infused with the human character of the girls, and so are much more…

        in RL, you have a ‘sense of self’ – have you heard of ‘phantom limb syndrome’? where you have an itch in your non-existent limb… :O

      • Valkeiper
        March 15, 2012, 4:26 am | #

        Used to be the definition of “Artificial Intelligence” was a program which could carry on a conversation without the human realizing he/she was talking to a program.

        That has changed because it has been realized no program can replicate every nuance of human conversation. This is now considered an ‘advanced step’ of realizing AI.

        The first step is much simpler (in some aspects) and much more difficult (in others).

        The new parameter: a program which can tell ANY feline (cat) from ANY canine (dog).

        That’s right, ANY feline (from housecat to tiger to lion to ocelot) from ANY canine (from any dog to coyote to wolf to dingo)… no matter what the markings, size, or age.

      • Kramegame
        March 15, 2012, 7:43 am | #

        It’s first joke “KILL ALL HUMANS.” Then someone will have to explain the difference between funny “ha-ha” and scared shitless “ha-ha”.

      • Dave
        March 15, 2012, 8:42 am | #

        “We’re all talking around the real issue here. Does Data have a soul? I don’t know if he does. I don’t know if I do! But, I have to give him the opportunity to explore that question for himself. Is Data a machine? Yes. Is he the property of Star Fleet? No.”

        STTNG, “The Measure of a Man”

      • Valkeiper
        March 15, 2012, 2:03 pm | #

        In the Xanth series. Bink had to contend with a manticore to visit the good magician.

        The manticore had asked the Humphrey if manticores had souls (since they are only partly human).

        Humphrey studied the matter intensely and finally told the manticore “ONLY if you had a soul would you worry about it.”

      • Dave
        March 15, 2012, 9:17 am | #

        In a sense, we’re back to the classic question of identity here. Am I the same person I was forty years ago? At the cellular level (and even at the molecular and atomic levels) there’s very little of that young man left in me… 90% or more of that body has been torn down and excreted, and replaced with new matter I’ve eaten. I know and believe much he did not, and have forgotten much that he knew and thought true. Both the physical patterns of synapses in my brain, and the information encoded therein, differ significantly from 40 years ago.

        I have a sense of continuity with him, but it has been interrupted many times by sleep or other unconsciousness.

        So, tell me… am I him? or is he dead, and I a poor copy who is “profoundly different”? Same question re you, of course.

        Classic Buddhism would reject the very concept that there is truly a unique “I” who could ask that question. Other religions would assert the concept of an immutable “soul” and say “yes, definitely”, but so far nobody had been able to produce a soul for examination and study.

        I truly think we don’t know the answer, even for ourselves… and the GGs are equally a mystery, unless/until Paul reveals more about the Wapsiworld’s workings.

      • Jay-Em
        March 15, 2012, 10:36 am | #

        Technically, we become ever more imperfect copies during our lifetime, until the genetic info gets messed-up to the degree that we get age-related pains and afflictions, something with telemerase strings that shorten every time a cell replicates.

        The fact that the GG have a “character” well, i decided to take it “as is”

        I was only pondering how the GG would digest food&drink, and thèn i read an article about Fission vs. Fusion, and it struck me.

        Maybe there is more to a Golem then “magical clay” clay is basically silica, so i can imagine that the lanthians devised a method to use the silica/clay of the bodies of the GG (and other Golems) as the circuitry and information storage of a Golem. A super advanced android, so to speak.

        They burnt the girls alive. Who knows what, combined with “magicks” , that will do to the original “soul” . Fuse it to the silicum, or sumptin’ thusly binding the soul to the ashes to be used in construction of the Golem.

        ( just letting my imagination run free here.)

      • bmonk
        March 15, 2012, 12:26 pm | #

        Dave, your question reminds me of Heraclitus, who said, “Everything changes and nothing remains still… and… you cannot step twice into the same stream.”

        Or Plutarch’s Ship of Theseus–or the modern knife that’s been through two handles and three blades, because “it’s the best knife I ever owned!”

        And Cratylus, who rejoined that you cannot step into the same river even once!

      • Dave
        March 15, 2012, 1:35 pm | #

        @bmonk: those are exactly the sorts of classic references I was alluding to… my question is far from a new one, and better minds than mine have been hashing it over for many centuries without reaching reliable conclusions.

        @SoWhyMe: I hear what you’re saying, but the situation probably not as clear-cut as that. It was standard-belief for many years that neurons do not (re)grow during adult life, at least not in most vertebrates, but research over the past decade or so has shown that it does happen – it’s turning out to be a part of the formation of new memories in the hippocampus, for example. Other classes of brain cells also grow and divide during adulthood. Even within individual long-lived neurons, there is a lot of turnover at the molecular level… proteins are being regularly turn down and replaced. There are very few parts of our cells which do not “turn over” fairly regularly during our lifetimes.

        Even within a body… if the corpus callosum is cut, and communication between the two sides of the brain is interrupted, research strongly indicates that you end up with two semi-independent “selves” in the same body, with split senses and knowledge. If this happened to me, which of these would be “me” after that?

        Or, flip it around… consider a chimera of the true human sort… a single body, a single “self” and personality, but consisting of cells which started out as two independently-fertilized ova (fraternal twins) and then merged. Is this one person or two?

        “Self-hood” is a really slippery topic. Fun, though!

      • illiad
        March 15, 2012, 2:31 pm | #

        dont you read scifi?? startrek, etc… there are plenty of stories about ‘copying’… even one with TWO Rikers… 🙂

        the best one is ‘10101011110’ or somethink like that… 🙂

    • Kramegame
      March 15, 2012, 7:48 am | # | Reply

      I think the happenings from their “shut down” period are a little more complex than turning off a computer monitor. At least that’s how you make it sound. If the priests or the immortals could do that, do you think they would really risk turning them back on? No, it would be that one selfish ass who wants to rule the world by blowing it up.

  10. Stigmartyr762
    March 15, 2012, 2:42 am | # | Reply

    Monica and Jin all liquored up……… @.@ *Now operating on a blown mind*

  11. NOTDilbert
    March 15, 2012, 2:49 am | # | Reply

    “Wha wazzat rumbumbling noise?”
    “Shadap you, thas’ what (BUUUUUURPPP)
    “Yah, yuh, yeah, tha’s the noizez’m herrin’..”

    Etc. This stuff writes itself. Usually illegibly….

  12. MerchManDan
    March 15, 2012, 2:55 am | # | Reply

    ….oh dear. The images going through my head – the awful, wonderful, naughty images.

    I’ll be in my bunk.

    • Dave11
      March 15, 2012, 5:55 am | # | Reply

      No grenades!

  13. Bucc-i
    March 15, 2012, 3:29 am | # | Reply

    Somos lo que comemos?
    Well, I guess that makes me a pussy.

    • Lee M
      March 15, 2012, 8:25 am | # | Reply

      I guess we all know how much worse that could be…

  14. Joe Minotaur
    March 15, 2012, 4:48 am | # | Reply

    Any lessons learned? Any at all?

    Not today!

  15. NWM
    March 15, 2012, 7:17 am | # | Reply

    wait, when did M’s hair grow back?

  16. Kramegame
    March 15, 2012, 7:51 am | # | Reply

    I hope that they told someone else the whereabouts of this island… I have a feeling they’re going to need a wake up call to get to work on monday…

    • eggishorn
      March 15, 2012, 9:30 am | # | Reply

      With those conical sea stacks in the background, I’m guessing somewhere off Southeast Asia, especially around Thailand or Northern Vietnam or Southern China. Although, Monica did specifically say they were choosing an island in the “twelve vortices” and the nearest one to that area is the supposed “Devil’s Sea” northeast of the Philippines. So, either they gave up on the idea of sticking to the vortices for locations or they found a very anomalous island.

  17. Aleister Crow
    March 15, 2012, 7:59 am | # | Reply

    Hmm. Those abrasions, plus sunburn, plus salt water… Lucky thing they’re medicatamipated.

    Any bets that some bizarre coincidence is going to happen to this island, too? Seems like too good of a running gag to pass up.

  18. TheDoctor
    March 15, 2012, 8:01 am | # | Reply

    Um OooKayy, Monica and Jin are 3 no 4 sheets-to-the-wind.
    Its Official, they are drunk ALONE on a desert Island. Now when they’re drunk….can HORNY be far behind? Remember …. Deserted Island. Hows the song go? “What happens in Mexico…” 😉

    • Lee M
      March 15, 2012, 8:27 am | # | Reply

      Heh. You’re not suggesting any kind of lesbian activity are you? Now why would anyone want… on second thoughts, never mind.

  19. Julie
    March 15, 2012, 8:55 am | # | Reply

    LOVE this page! 🙂 I think this may be one that will move onto my top 5 Wapsi strips list. 😀

    Because there aren’t enough webcomic polls out there…
    This bracket-based webcomic tournament could use some Wapsi love. 🙂

    • Julie
      March 15, 2012, 8:57 am | # | Reply

      (Wapsi’s in the “Simon Division” btw…it’s the last listed on the page. 🙂 )

      • Fairportfan
        March 15, 2012, 10:19 am | #

        Putting it against “Guilded Age” was just mean.

  20. kingklash
    March 15, 2012, 9:05 am | # | Reply

    La Isla Numero Dos. Come for the babes in bikinis, stay for the drunk babes in bikinis.

  21. TlalocW
    March 15, 2012, 9:32 am | # | Reply

    If what Monica says is true in panel two, then I’m cheap and easy.

    • fallconskat
      March 15, 2012, 11:11 am | # | Reply

      cheap and easy can be a hella lot of fun, though!! 😉

  22. as363
    March 15, 2012, 11:17 am | # | Reply

    So – tomorrow’s “Cliff-Hanger Friday – any bets ??

    • as363
      March 15, 2012, 11:38 am | # | Reply

      Altho – considering today is the “Ides of March” – quickly checks his Insurance Agent (he- of the melodious voice) to see if I am still covered.!!

    • CPUGuy1
      March 15, 2012, 12:06 pm | # | Reply

      Let’s see …

      A BOOM …
      Both do the same WIDE EYED look as from last Friday …
      Then they get wet … someone forgot to check the weather for the Island’s area.

    • Sheik
      March 15, 2012, 12:20 pm | # | Reply

      Let’s see…Karst topography, that means the beach will fall out from under them?

    • bmonk
      March 15, 2012, 12:27 pm | # | Reply

      Do you mean the ex-cliff from Island Numero Primo sailing over their heads?

      • scantrontb
        March 15, 2012, 7:35 pm | #

        that would have been some AWESOME Hang-Time on that cliff face then… Remember: they’ve had enough time to get a long(ish) lecture by Bud, change clothes for said class, have enough time to get VISIBLY blasted on wine BEFORE arriving at said island numero dos… and you think the parts of number 1 island will just NOW be landing?!

    • DJ
      March 15, 2012, 5:19 pm | # | Reply

      Drunkenly falling off a cliff and hanging on?

      • Cherish Bloom
        March 15, 2012, 11:37 pm | #

        you’d need a certain photographer (and her kitty) for that

    • Cherish Bloom
      March 15, 2012, 11:35 pm | # | Reply

      Time-travelling German seaman wants to know what happened to his sub, his sandy island and his secret volcano lair.

      And he’s Monica’s great-great grand uncle.

  23. Avenger_Reloaded
    March 15, 2012, 11:56 am | # | Reply

    I would’ve thought after Monica poited naked Bud into Kevin’s bed she’d have learned not to drink and poit.

    • Valkeiper
      March 15, 2012, 2:18 pm | # | Reply

      more like Monica learned how fun things can get when poiting drunk…

      so it seems she prefers being drunk when poiting

  24. Vex Godglove
    March 15, 2012, 1:10 pm | # | Reply

    More like “winers”

    • Cherish Bloom
      March 15, 2012, 11:37 pm | # | Reply

      “duh! whining!”

  25. N.C. Weber
    March 15, 2012, 2:35 pm | # | Reply

    Don’t drink and poit! Haven’t you girls ever seen those public service announcements on TV?

  26. N.C. Weber
    March 15, 2012, 2:39 pm | # | Reply

    Somebody call a coroner. I think that bottle is dead.

  27. Centaur12
    March 15, 2012, 2:57 pm | # | Reply

    If that were real medicine, those two would be Board-carded physicians by now…

    • Dave
      March 15, 2012, 3:11 pm | # | Reply

      I’m sure they have better taste, than to ever drink wine which comes in a Board-card box.

      • NOTDilbert
        March 15, 2012, 4:07 pm | #

        Keeping that Pun Jar fed must be one expensive hobby, huh, Dave? (Slides it down the counter to Dave’s stool)

      • Dave
        March 15, 2012, 4:35 pm | #

        Oh, it’s terrible… but much better than the alternative, of having to sit on all of these puns until I explode.

        (drops a gift card good for two Echidna martinis into the Pun Jar)

      • NOTDilbert
        March 15, 2012, 9:01 pm | #

        Ach, we can’t have that. Carry on –

  28. KaiserFrazer67
    March 15, 2012, 4:15 pm | # | Reply

    Given that they’re both still covered in bruises and scrapes, I’d say they were pretty well anaesthetized… Which would NOT make for a good situation should a similar emergency arise on THIS island… I smell a cliffhanger tomorrow.

  29. geekoncall
    March 15, 2012, 4:44 pm | # | Reply

    w h i n e r s ???

    • Dave
      March 15, 2012, 4:54 pm | # | Reply

      Come to think of it… on how many prior occasions have we been frustrated, by the fact that we can’t actually get any of the Wapsi characters to make the recommended Pun Jar donation? This isn’t the first in-strip pun, is it? (although it might be the first in-strip multilingual pun)

  30. Cherish Bloom
    March 15, 2012, 11:33 pm | # | Reply

    bf just commented that that second panel can be seen in a wholly inappropriate light.

    “At least there is light,” I commented as I punched his out.

    Be grape-ful that I am here to pour out my wrath.

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