It’s just a matter of finding the right protein shake. Wal-Mart’s store brand is surprisingly good, and it mixes with water as well as with milk (the only one that this was true for, of the many I have tried).
It’s amazing how often the cheapest version is also the bestest…
Had my jaw wired shut for 3 months after break then corrective surgery when I was a kid… spaghetti was easy but we never could figure out what liquid to mix with a cheese burger in a blender and not come out gross and still taste like a cheese burger…. get the shivers just thinkin’ about that time.
A recent episode of ‘Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives’ had a rerun of a place that served cheeseburger soup. Basicly a cheese chowder with onions, mustard, browned ground beef, with raw chopped lettuce and tomatoes added at serving. People raved on-camera.
I somehow think that she never did her more challenging poiting tricks with Alan like she did with and to Monica. He probably has no idea that she can pull direct to stomach poits.(or the more disturbing ones either (“You poited my pee and poo???”)
from what i have seen – short hair on people is darker than their main hair.
i suspect alan is just blondy-brown.
It will get bleached by the sunlight 🙂
I have an uncle like that. He has black hair but every time he tried to grow a mustache or beard he got red hair. Sometimes your genes just cant figure out what is what.
Me too–my hair is dark brown, so the red doesn’t show up, but my beard is just lighter enough so that in some light it is tinged red. And an uncle went the other way: hair was sandy blonde, beard was darker red.
I have brown hair, but my whiskers are so light-colored I can have a weeks growth of poppa-Hemingway and it will be practically invisible from ten feet away.
I was born platinum blonde and my hair didn’t really darken till I was ten or so, now its dark brown most of the year and picks up natural highlights during the summer. My beard tends to grow in a mix of platinum and dark brown which is why I always shave.
Just read one of those hard-boiled detective novels. It was quite fun!
…
Alan managed to blend and pour spaghetti without getting any on his sweater-vest. The rumors of his “not being what he seems” must be true!
When I was a wee lad I’d had a hernia operation just before Thanksgiving. My soft foods diet didn’t allow for much the next week out of the hospital, but thanks to the great kindness of a head waiter, I got to enjoy the feast anyway. While my parents feasted on the seasonal fare, I was served freshly made cherry jello with minced turkey in it!
My wife had dental surgery some months back and was on a no-chew diet for a couple of weeks, but was firmly instructed to “eat well”.
It was actually quite a revelation, how many of her favorite foods could be run through the industrial-strength blender, turned into goo, and be quite delicious and appetizing. Fortunately the appearance never bothered her. She did miss the crunch and texture, but at least the flavors were there… it wasn’t like being restricted to oatmeal and tapioca.
As it happens, yes. After wearing out several standard-issue blenders over the years we decided to buy a heavy-duty model. Other than the need to stuff plugs into our ears before using it (Ghu, it’s loud!) we haven’t regretted the decision.
A staple during the early post-surgery days was “Start with a tasty vegetable soup, throw in some shaved smoked turkey, blend until smooth”.
Alcohol produces tertiary effects in combination with an amazing number of different things; it’s not at all unlikely that Jin’s been given something that doesn’t work properly if she drinks.
Both pain killers and alcohol depressants and the mixture of the 2 will cause the respiratory system to become too depressed so yours can stop working effectively. In other words your diaphragm can stop giving you enough lung power and you fall asleep and don’t wake up. It doesn’t always happen but it does happen enough. Ask any medical professional, especially those in the pharmacy or ER (that’s where I got this tidbit).
Maark30- I’ve lost count of the number of people I’ve had dealings with who got run over by this problem.
Some of them learned zero the first time it happened. Others saw the handwriting on the wall. those ones mostly lived.
Jeezuz folks, get a LIFE! Did I say Jin wanted a margarita? Did I even suggest that SHE drink booze with oxycontin? In fact, where did YOU get the idea she was on hillbilly opium? I simply was disgusted at a spaghetti smoothie, but you Kiersey Guardians reacted as if you were IN the strip. So good for you. Like I don’t know this already. Jeesh.
It’s called free association. It tends to break out here quite often. One person says something which leads to another and things go from there. Of course, those with a persecution complex may take it personally, seeing bad meaning where there is none.
But, but, but… it’s a *Bendy-Straw* Everything thru a Bendy-Straw is BETTER than sucking it thru a regular ol’ fashioned boring *straight* straw…
Jin’s just getting that shocked, “OMG, THIS IS AWESOME!” look on her face when Paul snapped the photo for later processing into the comic we see here!
Pfroetsj!!! Aaaand there my morning-coffee went, giving my iPad another babtizing in caffeine….. Jin’s look is great! Subtle, but not too subtle….
Again, i feel for Jin. I got a titanium implant for a tooth that sadly departed somewhere between the table-jump, a wheel-rut and another Honda…. Couldn’t eat solids for a week!!! I STILL detest ” breakfast in a bottle” from HERO (local brand slushy fruit-drink ” with added fibres”. Yuck!)
There’s been some buzz recently about a new set of Federally-mandated reporting codes for diseases and accidents. With the right series of codes, you can specify exactly what the illness or injury is, precisely which part of the body is affected, whether this is the first, second, or subsequent medical interaction concerning it, where it happened, and what the injured party was doing at the time.
For example, a code sequence of “M21762 V9107XD Y92152 Y93D1” on a hospital report would tell the insurance company that the patient suffered a left-tibia injury, due to water-skis being on fire, while crocheting in the bathroom of a reform school. (As Dave Barry says, “I am not making this up!”).
I will have to dig into the new code database (there are aobut 140,000 such codes) to see if I can find a sequence which means
Burn injury to left and right sinuses, caused by explosive exhalation of coffee, suffered while reading Wapsi Square in the workplace
It’s bound to be a common enough injury that I’m sure they’ve codified it by now.
Hey! I wanna try spaghetti in a blender too! In fact, I wish I had some spaghetti right now, blender notwithstanding … sigh. I think she could use a bigger straw, however. Though she may have talents of which we are blissfully unaware.
Sort of an episode and a pinup all in one, and no clifforama-drama. Works for me. Won’t be tempted to come back again until Monday now. Well, maybe once or twice.
Well after what has been a month long sled ride through hell I find this a very welcomed relief, at least my nerves do. Great arc so far Paul. You have showed your chops in both suspense and emotional storytelling, Bravo
That song might make us come up with a companion to the pun jar–you know, for driveldoggerel that bears the same relationship to songs that puns do to humor.
*hufs for a bit* pfftt… As If!…
On a serious note, I believe it was Nudge, because she was always the one to get the demon-collective on tne move.
I wonder how Tina does without that disturbing-the-peace of demon-motivator…. We have only seen glimpses of her “real-being” without Nudge ( despite the scuffle in the coffee-shop)
Dunno–as long as it’s warm, it would possibly taste, and feel like the sludge-y mix of dough&sauce that’s left when you fished-out the ravioli-bits, not too bad..
It ain’t pretty but it works. I did pretty much the same thing for a buddy of mine back in the military when he broke his jaw in three places over Thanksgiving.
BTW. Is Alan experiencing a case of stress acne or did someone attack his upper lip with an ice pick?
Yes–it’s more important that he be there for her just now. Looking good and grooming is lower on the priorities. Especially given how she’s looking: maybe she appreciates the solidarity.
No no no – that was the Infamous Lenox Square Turkey Drop.
(Apparently from the back of a moving truck; WQXI in Atlanta was the inspiration for WKRP – the creator had been an ad sales man fro WQXI; Johnny Fever is based on Atlanta (among other places DJ Skinny Bobby Harper – Harper did time at seven stations in Atlanta alone…
Thank you, Paul, for letting us off easy this Friday. I will still be waiting for Monday, but not as impatiently and the weekend will be that much better.
As to whether or not the spaghetti tastes good like that, it really wouldn’t matter. When you’re hungry, really hungry, taste is secondary any way.
My former wife had a double osteotomy (sheer hell, I don’t recommend it) and had her jaws wired shut for 6 weeks or so. We came up with all sorts of blended concoctions for her… after a while on Ensure, anything even remotely tasting like food was welcome.
Now for my blended food story! One of my uncles (Ma’s cousin) was in a car crash, and came out of it with only a broken jaw. He was wired shut for a while, and during that time, we went to visit, bringing some sandwich fixin’s for lunch. Ma literally made a big ham and cheese with lots of lettuce and tomato, then cut it in half, dropped it in a blender, poured in some V8, and blended it smooth enough to drink with a straw. Then she made a couple more and put them in the icebox so he could have them later without too much trouble.
Incidentally… Is anyone else happy that for once, for frickin’ once, we get something tender, loving, and happiness-inducing for a friday as opposed to another suspenseful cliffhanger?
Yo. Although a steady diet of them might become boring, I do agree that encountering an occasional Warm Fuzzy of Surprising Emotional Rightness is a very pleasant experience.
When I go hit by the truck on my bicycle I managed to loosen every tooth in my mouth as well as lacerate my tongue with the stumps of my broken teeth (teeth broken before the wreck). I was on a bland/soft diet for about a week after I left the hospital because of the pain from chewing and spicy foods. The only good thing about it was ice cream for breakfast. Always vanilla because chocolate hurt, but still ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST!!
reminds me of when homer had his mouth wired shut. he could get a piece of meat on a fork past his teeth, so, after getting frantic, he finally snorted the meat.
Okay then…
Don’t knock it until you try it. Got to be better tasting then a protine shake.
I’ve had to, if the sauce was made right it is like a really thick V8.
Adding goodies and simmering it down, V-8 makes a great pasketti sauce…
Good to know!
It’s just a matter of finding the right protein shake. Wal-Mart’s store brand is surprisingly good, and it mixes with water as well as with milk (the only one that this was true for, of the many I have tried).
It’s amazing how often the cheapest version is also the bestest…
I tried that with a taco salad once. It needed some salt. It was okay, but …
Had my jaw wired shut for 3 months after break then corrective surgery when I was a kid… spaghetti was easy but we never could figure out what liquid to mix with a cheese burger in a blender and not come out gross and still taste like a cheese burger…. get the shivers just thinkin’ about that time.
A recent episode of ‘Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives’ had a rerun of a place that served cheeseburger soup. Basicly a cheese chowder with onions, mustard, browned ground beef, with raw chopped lettuce and tomatoes added at serving. People raved on-camera.
MMMMMM Dinner grub. 😉
Like I said. Comfort food through the blender!
i’m glad you explained that 🙂
my brain translated it as alan going nuts and overcompensating for him not being there by making her tons of food 🙂
Pretty much my first thought was “Buh?!”
If you’ve ever had a broken jaw (as I’ve had through surgery, just as I was starting high school), you’d recognize this for what it is immediately. 😉
Ohhh, the memories!
I saw it in my head at the start of the week and let it pass, What an error on my part lol
No–he made pureed spaghetti, not pizza. . . .
Speaking of which, if it ever gets too difficult for her to eat, they could always poit the pizza (or whatever) into her stomach.
Lots easier on the (broken) jaw.
Well, for heaven’s sake. That never occurred to me. Brilliant!
I somehow think that she never did her more challenging poiting tricks with Alan like she did with and to Monica. He probably has no idea that she can pull direct to stomach poits.(or the more disturbing ones either (“You poited my pee and poo???”)
And how does the blond guy with the blond beard have dark stubble?
Happens all the time. Like When blonde people have darker eyebrows. It’s a thing.
from what i have seen – short hair on people is darker than their main hair.
i suspect alan is just blondy-brown.
It will get bleached by the sunlight 🙂
stubble hair not short..
I read that as “man hair” the first couple times. XD I need coffee.
I have an uncle like that. He has black hair but every time he tried to grow a mustache or beard he got red hair. Sometimes your genes just cant figure out what is what.
Me too–my hair is dark brown, so the red doesn’t show up, but my beard is just lighter enough so that in some light it is tinged red. And an uncle went the other way: hair was sandy blonde, beard was darker red.
I have brown hair, but my whiskers are so light-colored I can have a weeks growth of poppa-Hemingway and it will be practically invisible from ten feet away.
Stelth stubble! 😀
Subtle stubble
Say that ten times fast, and I’ll give you a glass of blended spaghetti.
Subtle stubble, subtle stubble, subtle subl, suble buble … Rats!
hm, well, another argument of having a color page, instead of black and white….
Maybe we can convince Jabberwonky will do a color page of it. 🙂
Ha-Haa! I was looking up some color reference and, eventually, put ‘no chew spaghetti’ in gobble images and today’s Wapsi was on the second row…
Great Color job Jabber, I have to admit I always tried to visualize Alan’s face in color and never could until now. Thank you for doing this.
If you put no chew spaghetti in quotes, this comic is the only google hit you get. Without quotes, it’s still the first listing.
Done and done!
http://img35.imageshack.us/img35/1669/skettishake.png
Hmmm….something I noticed whilst, and at the same time, I was coloring the arts.
http://img853.imageshack.us/img853/258/paulalan.png
Nice!
Jin has blue eyes?
With her semi-oriental looks, i’d expect brown or hazel.
They’re actually green…
http://wapsisquare.com/images/jin_firewalk_800x600.jpg
I assumed that they would have gone back to her natural color when she got the expiration date.
Awesome! =D
I was born platinum blonde and my hair didn’t really darken till I was ten or so, now its dark brown most of the year and picks up natural highlights during the summer. My beard tends to grow in a mix of platinum and dark brown which is why I always shave.
Just like Grandma used to blend it! 😛
Or close enough. Jin may not still have her grandma’s glyph-sequenced semolina particle accelerator.
It was probably lost in alphabet soup wars.
That’s a double contribution to the pun jar, buddy!
(by order of Officer Sonja Fett, PESTS)
{Pun Enforcement Special Tactical Squad}
======================
In the later novels about J.A.Jance’s homicide cop J.P.Beaumont, he’s part of the State DA’s Special Homicide Investigation Team…
Just read one of those hard-boiled detective novels. It was quite fun!
…
Alan managed to blend and pour spaghetti without getting any on his sweater-vest. The rumors of his “not being what he seems” must be true!
Having given a fair amount of thought to what Alan might be, coloring this plate made me realize that:
1) Alan is human. (No supernatural teeth.)
2) As Dadman pointed out no stains from the blenderizing means only one thing. He is a human agent for the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
Yay Alan!
Been there – done that…..
When I was a wee lad I’d had a hernia operation just before Thanksgiving. My soft foods diet didn’t allow for much the next week out of the hospital, but thanks to the great kindness of a head waiter, I got to enjoy the feast anyway. While my parents feasted on the seasonal fare, I was served freshly made cherry jello with minced turkey in it!
Thank you, Mr. Ralph!
You would think that would be a given at restaurants.
Old people have a TON of money. Blended mush should be on the list of ALL places 🙂
True enough!
My wife had dental surgery some months back and was on a no-chew diet for a couple of weeks, but was firmly instructed to “eat well”.
It was actually quite a revelation, how many of her favorite foods could be run through the industrial-strength blender, turned into goo, and be quite delicious and appetizing. Fortunately the appearance never bothered her. She did miss the crunch and texture, but at least the flavors were there… it wasn’t like being restricted to oatmeal and tapioca.
Vitamix by any chance?
As it happens, yes. After wearing out several standard-issue blenders over the years we decided to buy a heavy-duty model. Other than the need to stuff plugs into our ears before using it (Ghu, it’s loud!) we haven’t regretted the decision.
A staple during the early post-surgery days was “Start with a tasty vegetable soup, throw in some shaved smoked turkey, blend until smooth”.
Eeeeeee!
🙂
if alan wasn’t taken I would wanna date him 😀
You mean “taken” or “fictional artwork” taken?
Wasn’t that a punchline some years back?
“Where are all the sensitive, caring and good looking men?”
“They already have boyfriends.”
Well, it’s not quite that true. But such guys tend not to stay on the open market that long.
That is only because so many people can’t handle 2 out of 3 when it comes to dating. ;-p
Frankly, I’d prefer a margarita.
on her tablets alcohol might not be allowed in a ‘you will die’ way
there ARE tablets like that 🙂
All pain pills are like that. The general formula goes like this: Oxycontin + Rum = No Respiration
🙂
the amount of times i have heard people say to others
“yes you are on pain medication but I am sure one glass won’t harm you!”
Nerver actually heard anyone on pain medication suggest they do it themselves however 😛
the point about alchohol is that it reduces the effectiveness of the pain killer…
* B U T * MAKE SURE YOU ASK YOUR DOCTOR FIRST!!!!
I can also make you faint, feel like you are on drugs… not very wise..:( 🙁
Re: Bill Engvall’s ‘Vicodin Vacation’ routine….
Pain + Rum = I dont need oxcowaht? More rum please!
Alcohol produces tertiary effects in combination with an amazing number of different things; it’s not at all unlikely that Jin’s been given something that doesn’t work properly if she drinks.
Both pain killers and alcohol depressants and the mixture of the 2 will cause the respiratory system to become too depressed so yours can stop working effectively. In other words your diaphragm can stop giving you enough lung power and you fall asleep and don’t wake up. It doesn’t always happen but it does happen enough. Ask any medical professional, especially those in the pharmacy or ER (that’s where I got this tidbit).
Maark30- I’ve lost count of the number of people I’ve had dealings with who got run over by this problem.
Some of them learned zero the first time it happened. Others saw the handwriting on the wall. those ones mostly lived.
Jeezuz folks, get a LIFE! Did I say Jin wanted a margarita? Did I even suggest that SHE drink booze with oxycontin? In fact, where did YOU get the idea she was on hillbilly opium? I simply was disgusted at a spaghetti smoothie, but you Kiersey Guardians reacted as if you were IN the strip. So good for you. Like I don’t know this already. Jeesh.
It’s called free association. It tends to break out here quite often. One person says something which leads to another and things go from there. Of course, those with a persecution complex may take it personally, seeing bad meaning where there is none.
ooh thats true
she will need food now 🙂
hope blended spaghetti will not put her off it 🙂 i like spaghetti 😀
Actually
Looking at that
Do you think Alan told her what it was before she tried it?
She looks kinda shocked 🙂
It’s the raccoon eyes.
Ever try to suck spaghetti through a straw? You would look like that too!
But, but, but… it’s a *Bendy-Straw* Everything thru a Bendy-Straw is BETTER than sucking it thru a regular ol’ fashioned boring *straight* straw…
Jin’s just getting that shocked, “OMG, THIS IS AWESOME!” look on her face when Paul snapped the photo for later processing into the comic we see here!
I dunno. Those bubble tea straws are pretty bloody cool. And they’d work brilliantly with purééd savory foods
And they even come in stainless steel
http://en.dawanda.com/product/18135685-Stainless-Steel-Bubble-Tea-Straw
SoWhyMe – the only reason I can see to carry one of those would be amateur vampirism…
Great,nNow I have to figure out how to make stainless steel bendy bubble tea straws.
Paul, thank you! That’s the best laugh I’ve had in days.
What a wonderful way to wrap up (or at least bookmark) a very emotional few weeks of Wapsi Square!
Pfroetsj!!! Aaaand there my morning-coffee went, giving my iPad another babtizing in caffeine….. Jin’s look is great! Subtle, but not too subtle….
Again, i feel for Jin. I got a titanium implant for a tooth that sadly departed somewhere between the table-jump, a wheel-rut and another Honda…. Couldn’t eat solids for a week!!! I STILL detest ” breakfast in a bottle” from HERO (local brand slushy fruit-drink ” with added fibres”. Yuck!)
“It got wet” is one of Apple’s most common warranty claims I bet for Wapsi Readers.
There’s been some buzz recently about a new set of Federally-mandated reporting codes for diseases and accidents. With the right series of codes, you can specify exactly what the illness or injury is, precisely which part of the body is affected, whether this is the first, second, or subsequent medical interaction concerning it, where it happened, and what the injured party was doing at the time.
For example, a code sequence of “M21762 V9107XD Y92152 Y93D1” on a hospital report would tell the insurance company that the patient suffered a left-tibia injury, due to water-skis being on fire, while crocheting in the bathroom of a reform school. (As Dave Barry says, “I am not making this up!”).
I will have to dig into the new code database (there are aobut 140,000 such codes) to see if I can find a sequence which means
Burn injury to left and right sinuses, caused by explosive exhalation of coffee, suffered while reading Wapsi Square in the workplace
It’s bound to be a common enough injury that I’m sure they’ve codified it by now.
Berry stole that from Anna Russell.
(So have i, but i always give credit.)
That man has talent. Dangerous talent, but dog gone it he does have talent.
Who, Paul or Alan?
yes
Hey! I wanna try spaghetti in a blender too! In fact, I wish I had some spaghetti right now, blender notwithstanding … sigh. I think she could use a bigger straw, however. Though she may have talents of which we are blissfully unaware.
Sort of an episode and a pinup all in one, and no clifforama-drama. Works for me. Won’t be tempted to come back again until Monday now. Well, maybe once or twice.
Well after what has been a month long sled ride through hell I find this a very welcomed relief, at least my nerves do. Great arc so far Paul. You have showed your chops in both suspense and emotional storytelling, Bravo
>>Though she may have talents of which we are blissfully unaware.
LOLOLOLOLOL ICwutudidther
I was wondering about the straw too. Especially since she also has some broken ribs–and so sucking on the straw would hurt. A lot.
mmmmm. Meat and pasta shake!
I wonder – is that fuzzy kitchen in the background the famous remodel disaster? 🙂
ITYM “infamous”
Yah.
YUM !
Hahahahahaha!!
HE IS THE BEST BOYFRIEND EVER!! XD
Yay!
And *yipes!* – major resonance with Jin, ’cause I’ll be eating my s’ghetti and other foods like that starting next tuesday – major dental overhaul 😛
Duuude.. I can completely empathize&sympatize..
You know what’s the worst? The Bill! Mine almost made me break another tooth from sheer shock!!
I thought shear shock was what the sheeps suffered from…
Ahem. (Taps Pun jar meaningfully) (c8
*sighs*
Let’s see, 37 bhat, 56 Indian rupee, a 1 pound coin and a funny shaped rock….
Will that do?
Oh, great. You got the song going through my head now.
He’s shorn, the sheep…
He’s shorn, the sheep.
He’s gonna lose his hair,
and say “Oh, what the *bleep*!”
A malted with a raw egg or two blended in can be rather nice and somewhat nourishing.
Nice! The comedy closer to a major story arc instead of a cliff hanger. Now we can all look forward to Monday and the start of a new adventure.
Pleeeeeeeeeeease
pin-ups…
Brandi and Stinky!!!
They’re Stinky and the babe.
Yes, Stinky and the babe
One is a golem,
The other’s a squid…
(I’d better stop now.)
Or possibly before you started 🙂
Narrrff!!!
That song might make us come up with a companion to the pun jar–you know, for
driveldoggerel that bears the same relationship to songs that puns do to humor.What should we call it? The Elevator Music jar?
bmonk- No, the not good enough for elevator music jar.
Shoot. Now I’m going to picture Alan with a fake Italian accent every time he speaks.
Hmm. I immediately reminded of Nudge’s threat to sing “On top of Spagehetti” when Tina was lazy.. aand , indeed, starting to sing that bit of horror.
Now, now – be fair – we don’t know it was Nudge.
*hufs for a bit* pfftt… As If!…
On a serious note, I believe it was Nudge, because she was always the one to get the demon-collective on tne move.
I wonder how Tina does without that disturbing-the-peace of demon-motivator…. We have only seen glimpses of her “real-being” without Nudge ( despite the scuffle in the coffee-shop)
Oh noooooooo!
Where’s the brain bleach?
I just had a mental image of “On top of Spaghetti” in Musak mode.
Heh. People in a restaurant once looked at my first wife and me when i burst out laughing, and then, after a second, so did she.
The Muzak was playing an instrumental of “Look What They Done to my Song, Ma”.
The cynicism (or desperate, abject poverty) necessary to be one of the musicians who recorded that is mind-boggling.
Happily, they weren’t caught in a recursive musical abomination causality loop or they’d still be humming that tune…
It’s the new “Lady and the Tramp” Italian scene. Course they aren’t kissing yet.
THAT song was what was running through my mind. Until it hit the razor wire at the Exit.
Deeds, not words, Master Alan.
I believe they may muddle through yet.
Guh… Spaghettishake sounds AWFUL.
Dunno–as long as it’s warm, it would possibly taste, and feel like the sludge-y mix of dough&sauce that’s left when you fished-out the ravioli-bits, not too bad..
Hmmm..ravioli…
“You can juice almost anything! I once juiced a HAM.”
-John Pinette 8)
You Here Four Hour!
You Go Now!
This makes me inexplicably happy.
And the question was asked: “Will it blend?”
And Alan answered it convincingly: “Yes it will!”
On a side note, I had ravioli just yesterday. It was gooooood!
I caught a clip of that on Youtube, it was hysterical.
“Will it blend?”
Reminds me of the comment: “Anything can be airdropped at least once!”
It ain’t pretty but it works. I did pretty much the same thing for a buddy of mine back in the military when he broke his jaw in three places over Thanksgiving.
BTW. Is Alan experiencing a case of stress acne or did someone attack his upper lip with an ice pick?
Stubble
The boy needs to shave then. LOL
He’s probably been too worried/stressed for that.
Yes–it’s more important that he be there for her just now. Looking good and grooming is lower on the priorities. Especially given how she’s looking: maybe she appreciates the solidarity.
Your friend was in the bombing run over Thanksgiving? Was he also over Macho Grande?
He’ll never be over Macho Grande.
“Pull up! Pull up! Pull up!”
No no no – that was the Infamous Lenox Square Turkey Drop.
(Apparently from the back of a moving truck; WQXI in Atlanta was the inspiration for WKRP – the creator had been an ad sales man fro WQXI; Johnny Fever is based on Atlanta (among other places DJ Skinny Bobby Harper – Harper did time at seven stations in Atlanta alone…
Y’know, he really oughta stay out of those three places.
…Yuck.
Thank you, Paul, for letting us off easy this Friday. I will still be waiting for Monday, but not as impatiently and the weekend will be that much better.
As to whether or not the spaghetti tastes good like that, it really wouldn’t matter. When you’re hungry, really hungry, taste is secondary any way.
It probably still tastes great…but the texture…
I’m thinking the texture would be similar to the coffee Eva Gabor would serve…
Jabberwonky- On Green Acres, I would have expected Unwashed, un-ground beans floating in boiling water. That woman had no kitchen skills
Well out of all the things you can blend, spagehtti isn’t the most gross sounding.
Well, it’s better than feeding her from a baby bottle.
But not as cute.
What would you feed her to!?
(I’m assuming you’d get her in the bottle via the blender…)
How about something strong that does not taste like gasoline to go with that?
Oxycontin…
My former wife had a double osteotomy (sheer hell, I don’t recommend it) and had her jaws wired shut for 6 weeks or so. We came up with all sorts of blended concoctions for her… after a while on Ensure, anything even remotely tasting like food was welcome.
First reaction…. eeewie. a second later, Aaaaaawww, Alaaaan! Very sweet of him. Thanks for the smile, Paul.
Now for my blended food story! One of my uncles (Ma’s cousin) was in a car crash, and came out of it with only a broken jaw. He was wired shut for a while, and during that time, we went to visit, bringing some sandwich fixin’s for lunch. Ma literally made a big ham and cheese with lots of lettuce and tomato, then cut it in half, dropped it in a blender, poured in some V8, and blended it smooth enough to drink with a straw. Then she made a couple more and put them in the icebox so he could have them later without too much trouble.
Spaghetti smoothie sounds good, actually.
Incidentally… Is anyone else happy that for once, for frickin’ once, we get something tender, loving, and happiness-inducing for a friday as opposed to another suspenseful cliffhanger?
Yo. Although a steady diet of them might become boring, I do agree that encountering an occasional Warm Fuzzy of Surprising Emotional Rightness is a very pleasant experience.
Got to be cruel to be kind.
Yes. Imagine how frustrating it would have been had Wednesday’s page been where the week ended.
This needs to be a poster….. then put up in a recovery ward cafeteria.
I tried to puree spaghetti in a blender once.
The can made a hell of a racket.
Jabberwonky- Watch out for the metal in your diet, it’s bad for your teeth. Ducks, and drops two pennies in the pun jar.
When I go hit by the truck on my bicycle I managed to loosen every tooth in my mouth as well as lacerate my tongue with the stumps of my broken teeth (teeth broken before the wreck). I was on a bland/soft diet for about a week after I left the hospital because of the pain from chewing and spicy foods. The only good thing about it was ice cream for breakfast. Always vanilla because chocolate hurt, but still ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST!!
That’s the spirit, make good from bad.
Well when life gives you lemons…hey! Free lemons!
And if you’re an Engineer, you’ll figure out how to burn a house down — with Lemons!
You know you have some serious mouth injuries when chocolate ice cream is too spicy…
you can get spicy chocolate now 🙂
and spicy ice-cream
myan mistica was my favourite (which is a chocolate ice cream Magnum blended with cinnamon, nutmeg and honey flavours)
<3
♥ !!
Eww. (Love spaghetti, it’s the thought of the blender-ghetti texture that makes me wanna yack…)
Oh good for Alan! I ‘member my momma making purééd chicken & grits for me when I had my braces and eating *hurt*
MMMmmm, now that sounds like a plate of comfort right there, chicken ‘n’ grits.
reminds me of when homer had his mouth wired shut. he could get a piece of meat on a fork past his teeth, so, after getting frantic, he finally snorted the meat.
sorry, “couldn’t”. he couldn’t get…