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by Paul Taylor on October 25, 2011 at 12:00 am
Story: Wapsi-Archive
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Discussion (132) ¬

  1. HarukoHoshiko
    October 25, 2011, 2:26 am | # | Reply

    ah search parameters refined. Good job M!

    • Atomic
      October 25, 2011, 8:17 am | # | Reply

      Oh look! On top of the stack is :

      “How I Did It” by Mayhuel

      Handy, that!

      • Julie
        October 25, 2011, 8:47 am | #

        BAHAHAHAHA!!!

      • ChrisHerself
        October 25, 2011, 9:02 am | #

        Ten internets for you sir XD

    • Stigmartyr762
      October 25, 2011, 10:02 am | # | Reply

      I wish my libraries search function was that user friendly.

      • Heph
        October 25, 2011, 5:51 pm | #

        Well if it is not yet try make it better 😉

  2. My2Cents
    October 25, 2011, 2:33 am | # | Reply

    She should have limited to languages she can read initially.

    • FatUncle
      October 25, 2011, 2:42 am | # | Reply

      Or, as FairportFan pointed out yesterday, it could be that as long as she’s in the Library, she can read anything, regardless of the language it’s written in. Hey, this is magic, not technology as we know it, remember?

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 9:48 am | #

        Actually, what i meant was that, as long as she has the key to the TARDIS … i mean, a “connection” to the Library, the Library will translate its books (or other media) for her, even if she’s not physically in the Library.

      • FatUncle
        October 25, 2011, 6:53 pm | #

        Oh.

      • Ogre
        October 26, 2011, 12:27 am | #

        You, sir/madam, win an internet for a TARDIS reference. Good times, good times…

        (I really shouldn’t post comments when half asleep and running on two hours of sleep after being awake for twenty, should I…?)

      • My2Cents
        October 26, 2011, 1:36 am | #

        An interesting question: The library is not located in this continuum, so technically it is not connected to our time stream. So the question is WHEN is the library? Does it contain books that we would perceive as written in the future, or are they locked from our access somehow to prevent paradoxes?

  3. msyendor
    October 25, 2011, 3:00 am | # | Reply

    boo-yah (lean) + love the sound effects. Now to break out the crumbly apple pie and start reading.

    • Julie
      October 25, 2011, 8:48 am | # | Reply

      No crumbs in the books please! 😛

    • chaitea
      October 25, 2011, 12:20 pm | # | Reply

      “Chugchugchugchug … slump.” Drinking in the knowledge you mean?

  4. Michael Michael Motorcycle
    October 25, 2011, 3:13 am | # | Reply

    That’s a smaller stack than I figured it would be.

    OH WELL

    • zacharaiaha
      October 25, 2011, 6:07 am | # | Reply

      She specified non-fiction. These are the technical manuals and enginerring specs for the cells and probably devices that used them. Probably not many of those were written in books. Stone walls more likely. lol. I don’t think the library collects those.

      • Julie
        October 25, 2011, 8:49 am | #

        Or perhaps it does, but in a useable “on paper” form. It is a magic library after all. 🙂

    • Wyvern
      October 25, 2011, 7:11 am | # | Reply

      Yes. You know what it’s like with google; you send it something like “Search for vimana cells, websites older than one year, in English, not involving motorcycles.” Then you get 48,443 hits, an advertisement for rechargable batteries, and a recipe for muffins.

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 9:49 am | #

        Ooo. Muffin?

        Me loove muffin!

        Om nom nom…

      • Wyvern
        October 25, 2011, 7:53 pm | #

        And now that you’ve mentioned it on the internet, google knows you like muffins.

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 8:20 pm | #

        Me like cookie, too!

      • Ratcatcher
        October 27, 2011, 5:10 am | #

        To Fairportfan- Over here in the corner we have Tea, cookies, and assorted pasteries. please don’t fight over the books or the food.

    • bmonk
      October 25, 2011, 10:50 am | # | Reply

      I dunno–her stack looks pretty big to me. . . .

      Oh, you meant the BOOKS!

      • Michael Michael Motorcycle
        October 26, 2011, 2:30 am | #

        …Cute…

  5. TheGeek
    October 25, 2011, 3:35 am | # | Reply

    Well that narrowed things right down.

  6. NOTDilbert
    October 25, 2011, 4:04 am | # | Reply

    “Pertaining to Earth”? There are books by/about alien Vimana Cells!?

    And a lot of ’em, by the look of it….

    • NOTDilbert
      October 25, 2011, 4:07 am | # | Reply

      And, apparently it’s a steam powered library.

      “Behold, the power – of STEAM!!”

    • illiad
      October 25, 2011, 4:59 am | # | Reply

      heh, 😀 got vimana, will travel…

    • Wyvern
      October 25, 2011, 7:08 am | # | Reply

      Better safe than sorry.

    • Boxilar
      October 25, 2011, 8:15 am | # | Reply

      Aliens, or viama cells that were used by humans in other places. If the wormholes span the galaxy, there may be other human settlements out there.

      It’s been 10,000 years since the Chimera’s rampage, (not counting the Calendar machine resets, they affected the whole galaxy). Wonder what any Lanthian offshoot civilizations have been up too?

    • Julie
      October 25, 2011, 8:52 am | # | Reply

      Maybe it’s not alien vimana cells so much as vimana cells that pertain to another dimension. I mean, if vimana cells relate to Indians (I’m assuming the country, not the Native Americans), then by narrowing the search to Earth, she could be weeding out religious texts that still would have been classified as “non-fiction”. *shrugs* Maybe.

    • Maark30
      October 25, 2011, 1:10 pm | # | Reply

      The library existed before man did. I believe Paul made a mention of something like that before.

  7. WillyTK
    October 25, 2011, 4:35 am | # | Reply

    Welcome back! Monica is just adorable standing next to that stack of references.

  8. The Old Wolf
    October 25, 2011, 4:40 am | # | Reply

    Golly, M looks so cute in that last panel…

    • Jabberwonky
      October 25, 2011, 1:48 pm | # | Reply

      Seconded!

      =.)

  9. FatUncle
    October 25, 2011, 6:39 am | # | Reply

    Now if we could just rig the thing to keep track of car keys …

    • jwhouk
      October 25, 2011, 8:01 am | # | Reply

      CHUGGGAchugchugchugCLUNK

      (pamphlet floats down in front of your feet)

      “Get a spare set, doofus.”

      😉

      • illiad
        October 25, 2011, 3:17 pm | #

        no , you miised the ads for ‘key finder fob’ – snap your fingers, and it appears right in your pocket.. make sure the keys are attached!! 🙂

      • FatUncle
        October 25, 2011, 10:46 pm | #

        I HAVE a spare set! I lose BOTH sets, dammit!

      • scantrontb
        October 25, 2011, 11:32 pm | #

        so… what you’re saying is that you really need a lost key fob finder finder! just make sure you don’t lose that one, as it’ll be a bit longer before we can invent the lost key fob finder finder finder!…

  10. stjen
    October 25, 2011, 7:11 am | # | Reply

    Well — at least the pile is only as tall as she is…

    • Fairportfan
      October 25, 2011, 9:50 am | # | Reply

      Not very tall at all, then…

    • Dave
      October 25, 2011, 9:52 am | # | Reply

      Not much worse than the stack that the average high-school senior has to haul around in her backpack these days.

      I wonder how many books the Library will let you check out simultaneously… whether you hit a limit, and the extras “go all dust-bunny”? Is there a two-week limit on inter- or intra-Library book loans?

      Seems to me that the “late fees” from this particular institution might be rather fearsome.

      • illiad
        October 25, 2011, 3:19 pm | #

        no late fees, they just disappear back to the library! 🙂

      • Dave
        October 25, 2011, 6:32 pm | #

        Handy… saves having to carry them back down the street.

        It’d be a bummer, though, if you had left your carefully-written notes in the book, and forgot to take them out before the Library said Plugh and the books faded away again.

      • Kramegame
        October 25, 2011, 10:25 pm | #

        my guess is the notes would stay, and the book wouldn’t. unless you wrote them IN the book. which in that case, you deserve it. 😛

      • scantrontb
        October 25, 2011, 11:34 pm | #

        that’s OK too.. remember that “The Library” keeps a copy of ALL things written! all you’d need to do is to check out your OWN NOTES!

      • Paula
        October 26, 2011, 1:38 am | #

        Ohh thinking like that
        would Monica have access to her own writings?
        I mean Brandi got hers from Phixx.
        Heck I have done searches on my own name (mainly because my name was mentioned in a CD thanks i had – must be a different paula but was sooo cool to read it!!) so I suspect saying ‘give me all books written by Paula’ would be one of my first searches ^^

  11. AnthonyA
    October 25, 2011, 7:22 am | # | Reply

    Love the pose in the final panel. Great strip, always.

  12. TheDoctor
    October 25, 2011, 7:38 am | # | Reply

    Actually I think the stack makes her look Taller.

    • TheDoctor
      October 25, 2011, 7:41 am | # | Reply

      …..And Sexier! Or is that just what a week away from M and the Girls does to you?

      • Julie
        October 25, 2011, 8:53 am | #

        Potentially…but I think it’s the hat…combined with the short skirt. 🙂

        Oh, and am I the only one that imagined a golf club in her hands in the final panel? 🙂

      • bmonk
        October 25, 2011, 10:52 am | #

        I actually had a similar thought–but I saw a croquet mallet, for some reason.

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 11:48 am | #

        With that hat? Golf, definitely.

      • SoWhyMe
        October 25, 2011, 5:32 pm | #

        It looks to me as if she had to do a quick leg cross-over to prevent the books landing on her right foot. That or she performed a 90 degree body twist without lifting her legs.

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 7:00 pm | #

        http://electronictiger.net/avail/putt.png

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 7:01 pm | #

        Hmmm: http://electronictiger.net/avail/putt.png

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 7:02 pm | #

        Thought so. The parser on this forum is case-sensitive.

      • Dave
        October 25, 2011, 7:59 pm | #

        Safer to use an explicit tag, I think.

        Very nice work on the golf-artwork!

      • Jabberwonky
        October 25, 2011, 10:29 pm | #

        That’s not a golfing outfit.
        (there’s a distinct lack of awful plaids)

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 11:07 pm | #

        If i’d known you wanted awful plaids, i’d have put some in.

        BTW – you can’t see it (you couldn’t actually see it in the original graphic i lifted it from), but that is a Hello Kitty putter.

      • Jabberwonky
        October 25, 2011, 11:10 pm | #

        That’s not the weirdest ‘Hello Kitty’ officially licensed merch I’ve seen…

      • Julie
        October 26, 2011, 8:59 am | #

        LIKE!

  13. Kestralyn
    October 25, 2011, 8:49 am | # | Reply

    Ok, I’m in a total librarian swoon, here! I wanna play in that library 🙂

    • Julie
      October 25, 2011, 8:54 am | # | Reply

      That makes two of us! 🙂 You would never get me out of there…ever. 😀

    • The Old Wolf
      October 25, 2011, 9:15 am | # | Reply

      That’s a place I could happily starve to death in.

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 9:51 am | #

        Just don’t break your glasses…

      • Opus the Poet
        October 25, 2011, 8:46 pm | #

        Twilight Zone! “All the time in the world” with Burgess Merideth. “It’s not fair!”

      • bmonk
        October 25, 2011, 10:55 am | #

        I’ve often thought of heaven as a complete library, with all pristine books, and a complete restaurant/coffee bar so you don’t have to leave.

        (Am I a total nerd, or what??)

      • Casey
        October 25, 2011, 12:40 pm | #

        Would that mean that hell is a library where every book has the spine cracked, pages ripped out, images defaced, and the words are in a language that you don’t understand?

      • Paula
        October 25, 2011, 1:07 pm | #

        fire and brimstone visions have never bothered me

        YOUR vision made me nervous…

      • bmonk
        October 25, 2011, 2:44 pm | #

        That would be a good start. Add some really cranky librarians, and obnoxious patrons–with sniffles.

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 3:12 pm | #

        Nah – pristine bindings.

        All mysteries.

        Fiendishly clever mysteries.

        With the last chapter missing.

        (Ever see the original Bedazzled?)

      • Jabberwonky
        October 25, 2011, 3:41 pm | #

        Yes, the original is a gem.
        I think I’ve seen the remake, but don’t actually remember much about it…
        That and “The Magic Christian” are two of my fave British comedies…

      • bmonk
        October 25, 2011, 5:49 pm | #

        I once heard that, to really hurt someone, you don’t just take away what they love. You give it back to them–broken.

      • Dave
        October 25, 2011, 7:50 pm | #

        So, Hell is a place whose entertainment system is stocked entirely with bad Hollywood remakes?

        Oh.

        Hey, God – I promise I’ll be Very Very Good!

      • SoWhyMe
        October 26, 2011, 12:09 am | #

        Worse. They’re all on film and it breaks every few seconds. Plus the sproket holes are worn and it jumps all the time.

      • Paula
        October 26, 2011, 1:41 am | #

        I’ve always assumed Hell would be personal.
        What scares one person doesn’t bother the another.

        Maybe in the ancient times being burned alive was a real and tangible danger so would be a good thing to say to relate to people.

    • Paula
      October 25, 2011, 1:09 pm | # | Reply

      Me too 🙂
      I squee when i visit a ‘waterstones’ or a decently stocked library.
      I would quite possibly die from happiness were i to visit this one 🙂

  14. donho
    October 25, 2011, 8:54 am | # | Reply

    Desk upon request?

  15. Centaur71
    October 25, 2011, 9:22 am | # | Reply

    Vimana? Wasn’t she a character in Scooby Doo? 😛

    • Fairportfan
      October 25, 2011, 9:52 am | # | Reply

      No – you’re thinking of the red-headed duck … you know, Daphene.

      • Paula
        October 26, 2011, 1:26 am | #

        velma

        daphne was the blonde

    • Dave
      October 25, 2011, 9:55 am | # | Reply

      No, I think you’re thinking of that popular song from the late 1950s or early 1960s…

      “Oh, please,
      stay with me,
      Vimana!”

    • Dave
      October 25, 2011, 10:03 am | # | Reply

      No, I think you’re thinking of that popular song from the late 1950s or early 1960s…

      “Oh, please,
      stay with me,
      Vimana!”

      Apologies if this shows up twice… I think I hit a race condition in WordPress when I posted it the first time, due to a collision with FairportFan’s comment postedcat the same moment.

      • Jabberwonky
        October 25, 2011, 1:54 pm | #

        This song?

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8a_T3U1rg2I

      • Dave
        October 25, 2011, 3:48 pm | #

        No, I was thinking of

        Diana by Paul Anka.

        “I’m so young, and you’re so old…”

      • Jabberwonky
        October 25, 2011, 4:14 pm | #

        Hey! Whatta tryin’ to say there Dave?

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 7:22 pm | #

        Ah ha! I just identified where Big Daddy got one of their arrangements from!

      • Fairportfan
        October 25, 2011, 7:23 pm | #

        …and a Big Daddy discography, with the sources of their arrangements appended to each song – in a sort of cryptic crossword clue style.

  16. ohnhai
    October 25, 2011, 10:32 am | # | Reply

    Its not that you search. It’s HOW you search…

    • CPUGuy1
      October 25, 2011, 6:52 pm | # | Reply

      Using what she said from the last post …
      And with what she’s saying here – looks like she has a lot of practice with/from Google.

  17. AvengerReloaded
    October 25, 2011, 11:19 am | # | Reply

    “…and a cup of coffee while you’re at it…”

  18. Orsi
    October 25, 2011, 11:52 am | # | Reply

    I would cheerfully give everything I own for a library card like Monica’s.

    • jae
      October 25, 2011, 1:06 pm | # | Reply

      With that librarian, I’d be *very* careful to return all books on time 😉

  19. jae
    October 25, 2011, 1:05 pm | # | Reply

    If you specified “non-fiction”, I wonder how many of those books were considered fiction (or, “rantings of a crackpot loon”) by “normal people”.

    • donoho
      October 25, 2011, 5:26 pm | # | Reply

      Super Smart Library knows whose version of (non)fiction you mean.

  20. Paula
    October 25, 2011, 1:06 pm | # | Reply

    yknow
    if the original library did this – no wonder humans got banned from it 🙂

    if, when I die, heaven is like ‘when dreams come true’ this library is sooo gonna be in my part of it ^^

    • illiad
      October 25, 2011, 3:37 pm | # | Reply

      no, they just think its another empty warehouse…. 😛

      – nothing to see, until it recognizes you! 😀

      • Jabberwonky
        October 25, 2011, 3:44 pm | #

        Een Lawntees, de lybrery reads YOU!

      • Maark30
        October 25, 2011, 10:45 pm | #

        Nicely put Jaber. 😉

  21. Alexx
    October 25, 2011, 3:50 pm | # | Reply

    Hey, that’s just how my library works!

    Oh wait no, that’s just computers. Because that’s all the library is good for anymore. I mean seriously; even the people waiting to get on one of the computers don’t bother to pick up a book and read something while they wait. They’d just rather sit there and stare ahead.

    *sigh*

    • Paula
      October 26, 2011, 1:30 am | # | Reply

      my library doesn’t even stock the classics any more.
      HG Wells is not on the shelves..
      Did not check Agitha Christie but I suspect not.

      If (like mine) they only stock the newbie books such as “how i annoyed peter andre and my other husbands and made a packet of cash” by Jordan (i could be wrong on the title) I would avoid the books also 😛

  22. ShadOBabe
    October 25, 2011, 3:56 pm | # | Reply

    Haha!! Love the disembodied voice of the library.
    If I was in this library, I think I’d be tempted to try and actually hold a conversation with it. XD

    • Fairportfan
      October 25, 2011, 7:04 pm | # | Reply

      Are we sure that the Library isn’t part of Castle Heterodyne?

      • Wyvern
        October 25, 2011, 8:08 pm | #

        Castle Heterodyne would have delivered the books with an armored monster, surprising trap door, or steam catapult.

      • NOTDilbert
        October 26, 2011, 1:06 am | #

        Or all three at once!

      • Ratcatcher
        October 27, 2011, 5:20 am | #

        Wyvern- I’d be more worried about how the rejected tomes were removed. Stay out of the lines of fire.

  23. MerchManDan
    October 25, 2011, 4:30 pm | # | Reply

    I hope I wasn’t the only one who was a bit startled when the library actually responded verbally to Mon.

    • Dave
      October 25, 2011, 5:29 pm | # | Reply

      We’ve seen the Library speak verbally in the past… in particular, it spoke to Phix and Nudge when it appointed them as co-guardians of the Library and said that they were free to come and go as they wished.

      It’s definitely interesting that it’s speaking to Monica directly… I don’t think we know whether all Library visitors are so privileged.

      • SoWhyMe
        October 26, 2011, 4:30 pm | #

        The odd thing is Phix indicated that was the first time in all those thousands of years the Library spoke. Was she unaware of the search feature? Not likely.

  24. SoWhyMe
    October 25, 2011, 5:46 pm | # | Reply

    We could duplicate such a thing today had we a holodeck type device. The closest we could come now would be be to use virtual reality glasses and motion sensing. The thing lacking would be the tactile feel of the book. Someone is working on gloves that are supposed to give that sensation, however.

    To me, it’s just a gimick. It’s much better simply to be able to do a search on a screen. You can get right down to the word by that method. Don’t have to lug faux books around either. This method, while cool, would get old after a while. You would just get used to it and it would lose it’s dramatic effect pretty quick. Sort of like HD TV. The only good thing about it would be that it can cross cultural boundries. The book form would likely be familiar to many of different tech levels.

    • FatUncle
      October 25, 2011, 6:57 pm | # | Reply

      “And besides, the grapes were probably sour.”

      OK, since no one else has said it – that last panel is a data dump.

      • Dave
        October 25, 2011, 7:58 pm | #

        Nnngh.

        Pay the Pun Chamberpot, dude (I won’t say “Make a deposit in”, even though I’m thinking it. Uh…)

      • SoWhyMe
        October 26, 2011, 4:38 pm | #

        Don’t you know of the danger in making puns about the pun jar?! You might set up an infinite causal loop that could engulf us all!

      • Dave
        October 27, 2011, 4:03 pm | #

        Gotta. A few months ago I was condemned to suffocate in the Pun Jar, for having committed a really terrible/good one.

        Generating a meta-reference pun loop, and converting the Pun Jar into a Klein bottle, was the only way out.

        I promise, I’ll put the Universe back where it belongs, when I’m done playing with it 🙂

    • Wyvern
      October 25, 2011, 8:16 pm | # | Reply

      It’s in the works. For years people have been thinking about displays, and entire pad computers, that you could fold up like an handkerchief and stuff into your pocket. It’s not quite here yet. But when it’s possible, one of the obvious formats is the book with pages that show whatever they need to (for example, A Young Lady’s Illustrated Primer). If you own an iPhone you can use google and Siri together for pretty much exactly the interface experience Monica just had.

  25. Opus the Poet
    October 25, 2011, 8:25 pm | # | Reply

    This time I had the cultural flashback of Don Martin, for the onomatopoeia of the library. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don_Martin_%28cartoonist%29

    • DSL
      October 25, 2011, 10:11 pm | # | Reply

      DonMartin would have given us something like: Flappita Flappita Flappita Flappita THPLAPTH. Or maybe something like FAGROONklubbleklubbleklubble, which he established as the definitive sound of a collapsing supermarket.

    • Paula
      October 26, 2011, 1:34 am | # | Reply

      I read that as
      Doc Martin.

      got a slightly different thought process 😛

  26. Kramegame
    October 25, 2011, 10:19 pm | # | Reply

    I AM OFFICIALLY JEALOUS! Oh how I wish Google came in book form… i would much rather turn a page than click a mouse…and that is a very backwards premise for my age group… 😛 😛 😛
    (hey if I’m gunna dream, i’m gunna dream big…)

    • Kramegame
      October 25, 2011, 10:20 pm | # | Reply

      whoops that last line didn’t get deleted from my edit… ignore whats in the parentheses…

      • scantrontb
        October 25, 2011, 11:44 pm | #

        what do you mean “edit”?? you can’t edit your posts here…

        as far as i know that is…

    • Paula
      October 26, 2011, 1:33 am | # | Reply

      kinda like ‘the hitchhikers guide to the internet’?

  27. Fairportfan
    October 26, 2011, 12:49 am | # | Reply

    *cricket* *cricket*

    • Paula
      October 26, 2011, 1:31 am | # | Reply

      i thought that season was over?
      the seem to be playing rugby now..

      • as363
        October 26, 2011, 1:36 am | #

        And New Zealand won the cup by beating France . Much joy in Christchurch now – took their minds off the earthquake .

  28. as363
    October 26, 2011, 1:38 am | # | Reply

    Is it just me – or is Paul a little tardy this morning .

  29. kingklash
    October 26, 2011, 11:15 am | # | Reply

    But can it tell us of Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters, the planet Bethselamon, or what is the method used to make the hostess’ undergarments jump three feet to the left?

    (of course one can go to h2g2.com and find that out)

  30. Basil
    October 29, 2011, 1:09 am | # | Reply

    Good thing she didn’t ask for all the dangerous creatures of Fourecks!
    😉

  31. witunderpressure
    July 4, 2012, 11:53 pm | # | Reply

    sorry for any repeats. large library; parameters are nonfiction pertaining to earth, and that’s only about 20 books?

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