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"Soft And Spongy"
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Soft And Spongy
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Soft And Spongy

by Paul Taylor on May 3, 2012 at 12:00 am
Story: Wapsi-Archive
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Discussion (131) ¬

  1. Fairportfan
    May 3, 2012, 1:49 am | # | Reply

    Gym class is probably responsible for more people despising exercise than any other single thing.

    • Cyrus McDugan
      May 3, 2012, 1:58 am | # | Reply

      Agreed. I had several PE teachers, and all of them did the same sh*t: work with those who were good in sports and despise (or at least ignore) the rest.

      • Fairportfan
        May 3, 2012, 2:10 am | #

        What’s worse is when they don’t ignore you and push you into all sorts of things you’re not good at/hate.

        Like team sports.

      • The Old Wolf
        May 3, 2012, 5:24 am | #

        The device has not yet been conceived that can measure my indifference to team sports, largely because of this phenomenon.

      • bmonk
        May 3, 2012, 10:19 am | #

        Measuring my indifference would be easy: it is simply huge.

        Measuring my concern or interest for team sports, especially pro, however–that would take more than the best scanning electron microscope. It’s probably shorter than the plank length, and passes faster than a quantum unit of time. It’s lost in the foaming sea of the virtual vacuum. It’s–well, you get the idea.

      • waldosan
        May 3, 2012, 11:47 pm | #

        personally i enjoyed gym class, i was a slacker in school and the gym teacher was the only one who didn’t care that i didn’t give two sh**s for any of the other classes. i enjoyed the games and the stuff like that, and personally i came out of gym class smarter than i did going into it… course i went to a freaking awesome public school so there’s that…

      • nova
        May 3, 2012, 8:31 am | #

        So, when you have a class of 20 or so kids, what do you do to get them all active and doing something in a way that gets them to work together and which hopefully makes it fun for most of the class? Would it have been better if they just said “There’s some balls and other crap. Go run around and do whatever.”?

        It always seemed to me that the kids who “hated gym” were the hyper self-conscious ones.

      • Julie
        May 3, 2012, 11:22 am | #

        Well, you certainly don’t ignore the kids who aren’t good at the activity in favor of the ones who excell. You pay attention to the kids who need direction and guidance. You encourage the “star students” to work together on the task under light supervision and focus on helping out the people who need it most.

        Just my opinion of course. I’ve only ever provided limited education within the realms of my job, but that method seemed to work best…and I was also one of those kids who was overlooked in gym class (even though I was at least decent in team sports).

      • kermit
        May 3, 2012, 9:24 am | #

        I wasn’t timid at physical activity (I do martial arts still, 40 years later), but I hate team sports. As a geek, all of my activites have been solo or with a friend or two (hiking, weight training, MA, gardening, etc.). Competition bores me, and most of the class simply learned that they “weren’t meant to do sports”.

        There are plenty of activities that everybody can do within their limits and improve on, noticeably. Weight training, swimming, walking and running, fencing, yoga, dancing. People should learn how to eat and stay in shape in public school, not learn that they hate football. They probably knew that already, anyway.

        The sports teams are there for the kids who want to join them.

      • Stigmartyr762
        May 3, 2012, 4:38 am | #

        It seems to be a prerequisite that all gym teachers be jock/bully/assholes who enjoy ridiculing those who aren’t athletically inclined.

        I hated every one of my gym teachers growing up.

      • Francisco
        May 3, 2012, 4:59 am | #

        My PE (Physical Education) teachers weren’t bad.

        I wasn’t good at PE but I wasn’t picked on/treated poorly by my PE teachers.

      • Stigmartyr762
        May 3, 2012, 12:38 pm | #

        You were one of the lucky ones then.

    • joe
      May 3, 2012, 5:14 am | # | Reply

      I was reasonably good at Sports. They were however not my interest thus boring as hell. Except bowling, I got a high school Varsity letter in Bowling. (Duck and 10 pin oooh yea Double threat coming through)

      • Julie
        May 3, 2012, 11:23 am | #

        I wish my school had bowling as an option! 🙂 I’d have lettered in it given how much bowling I did my junior and senior years.

      • Danzier
        May 3, 2012, 5:01 pm | #

        🙂 Some of my favorite gym class memories: my dad drove the bus to the bowling alley.

        Our gym classes took a “Here’s life, have it the fun way” tactic. We did a couple weeks of different things people think are fun. Hence we got archery, ping-pong, basic CPR and rescue, skiing (mostly cross-country), golf, and gymnastics. And of course bowling. The only unit I didn’t pass was gymnastics. I have bad knees and worse balance, and I’ve never been able to stand on my head, let alone do any of the other stuff.

        Having these classes in high school did a lot to reverse the elementary and middle school gym-class-is-hell issues that I’d developed. Now I’ve got asthma and can’t do most of the physical stuff even if I wanted to, but at least I know there are “sports” that could be fun. Like archery. 😉

    • Kramegame
      May 3, 2012, 6:43 am | # | Reply

      Actually, my school was one of the cool ones where our [insert sport] team almost always went to states and sometimes nationals. So there was always a reason for the coaches to be happy, and so they were always having as much fun as we were. I would go as far as to say they actually cared about us. Of course, I’m bit of an athlete myself despite my weight, so I think the effort I put in kept them off my back.

      TL:DR I am in the minority, and found P.E. to be fun and a good break from class.

    • Cholo
      May 3, 2012, 11:18 am | # | Reply

      <– Last one picked for everything.

      Wasnt like that in the beginning though and i doubt any kinda teacher .. even the most understanding and fair one .. could change what happens.

      Some exercise also "require" a lot from you in the style of .. "all in or not at all". It dosnt really matter if you only want a "normal" or "medium" participation yourself.

      The hype can "kill it" as well. Like i actually like playing soccer myself in the beginning, but once sitting at a full 2 hours live match and have it end at a dull 0 – 0 made me think it all over. Maybe im simply to dim to be able to unquestionably love everything about soccer.

    • Glass_skunk
      May 3, 2012, 11:50 am | # | Reply

      My favorite part about gym was how nobody realized i was having panic attacks and just yelled for me to run faster, not! >:(

      • Danzier
        May 3, 2012, 5:05 pm | #

        I had a gym teacher in third grade who didn’t pay attention to the class. My friend had an asthma attack and passed out in class, and was yelled at for lying down.

      • Maark30
        May 3, 2012, 11:25 pm | #

        Nowadays he would have been put up on charges of child neglect and endangerment. Sometimes I don’t miss the “good ol days” all that much.

    • msyendor
      May 3, 2012, 12:07 pm | # | Reply

      Gotta visit her spooky bra architect. More high-tensile cables needed and maybe rebar mesh undercup.

      Also hated the regimental P.E. classes. But there was one P.E. teacher who taught extracurricular dancing on her own time (line, square, scottish, tinikling, etc.) Best workouts there.

    • Jade
      May 3, 2012, 9:42 pm | # | Reply

      Agreed, the problem being that gym classes in school were nowhere near fun.
      I mean, i know that working out is not always fun & games, but if I want a real workout i’ll do it by myself out in nature or in a real gym.
      School gym classes are not supposed to be grind, they are supposed to be a fun way to get some excersize.

    • quarktime
      May 4, 2012, 9:36 pm | # | Reply

      Back in the mid-60’s, the “President’s Council for Physical Fitness” convinced Robert Preston to do a kids’ exercise song called “the Chicken Fat Song”. It was played in grade school gym classes all over the country as a calisthenics workout drill for a couple of years. It was the most degrading, insulting, and annoying piece of self-esteem guerilla-assault music ever perpetrated upon kids’ fitness. And that includes ANYTHING ever produced for Barney.

      If you want to hear how incredibly painful this was: http://youtu.be/EFofqe26t-4

    • blackflame
      June 21, 2012, 7:56 am | # | Reply

      It was the limited sports available at my school that scrambled me. Winter – football or rugby, Summer – cricket or athletics. I ranged from poor to absolutely hopeless at all those.

      But in the sixth form, I played a match against the staff at badminton, and took HUGE pleasure in thrashing all the PE teachers who had treated me as one of the pathetic geeks in the corner the previous five years. I had been playing since I was five, played for my university and several clubs in local leagues till I tore my elbow. One of the economics teachers beat me tho 🙂

      And I blame the way English Lit was taught for how few kids read. I love books, own hundreds, have read thousands, and I despised English Lit class. What the poor sods who didn’t like books in the first place felt like, I dread to think…

    • donutguy640
      October 4, 2019, 4:47 pm | # | Reply

      My PE teacher made me hate exercise in a very different way. I hate dancing, and he routinely made us choreograph to Hansen. I distinctly remember having to shoot scrunchies into the air. It was only after this that I learned “Baptists don’t dance” and I could have claimed religious exemption.

    • Skepticaemia
      October 14, 2023, 9:28 am | # | Reply

      I see that I am with my people. My father was a phys. ed. teacher…….

  2. Francisco
    May 3, 2012, 1:53 am | # | Reply

    At least she realises her problem. Actually, I wrote a blog post about exercise and motivation the other day. Maybe she should read that?

  3. Joe Minotaur
    May 3, 2012, 1:54 am | # | Reply

    I exercise my right to NOT exercise!

    • bmonk
      May 3, 2012, 10:29 am | # | Reply

      Unfortunately, like Monica, it’s given me the body of a god: Buddha. [Yes, I know that he really isn’t a god. Deal with it.]

      • fallconskat
        May 3, 2012, 1:35 pm | #

        ganesh!

        i’ve the body of a goddess…the venus of willendorf. 😉

    • AnotherDave
      May 3, 2012, 7:41 pm | # | Reply

      I have the body of a goddess and I’m not giving it back!

  4. Maark30
    May 3, 2012, 2:00 am | # | Reply

    Well she is definitely getting a positive affirmation from all of this. Ans she might actually listen to her doctor about her high cholesterol. Now all that she has to do is get Tina and hit Punk Yoga a few days a week.

    • Michael Birks
      May 3, 2012, 7:59 am | # | Reply

      The issue I’m having with the whole Punk Yoga idea is the concept of Tina and Jacqui in the same room.

      That much daisy and sunshine makes me think of triffids.

      • Dave
        May 3, 2012, 8:20 am | #

        You’re thinking it would take the threat of a lethal poison-tipped lash to actually get Monica to exercise?

      • TlalocW
        May 3, 2012, 9:35 am | #

        Now I want to see a storyline where Nudge changes herself into a Triffid to chase Monica…

      • Yamara
        May 3, 2012, 9:45 am | #

        Punk Yoga may actually have one of those in reserve.

        And, we haven’t seen Jacqui in awhile. I wonder how long she’ll be able to keep oblivious of the magic cavalcade in her studio, what with all the mindfulness meditation she must practice.

      • Dave
        May 3, 2012, 10:06 am | #

        Gaah. Now I’ve got the image stuck in my head of a vigorous exercise class at Punk Yoga, being led by a line-dancing trip of triffids, to the tune of the Alvin and the Chipmunks’ cover version of Devo’s “Whip It”.

        I swear, that box of tea I brewed up for breakfast was labeled “Licorice Mint”. Perhaps giving up coffee is causing withdrawal symptoms?

      • Ratcatcher
        May 4, 2012, 5:55 am | #

        Dave- Can I have some of that tea for the weekend? I don’t have to be too normal then and maybe I can see something weird to.

      • Jade
        May 3, 2012, 9:45 pm | #

        What ? seem too far-fetched ? The reluctance with which she bought a bike and the readiness to gorge herself on sweet stuff state the obvious 😉

  5. Francisco
    May 3, 2012, 2:02 am | # | Reply

    Last night I filled in a survey that a comedy programme asked a reputable market research company to conduct. I can’t remember all the options but I said it selected “loud music”. They didn’t ask for a reason but, in my case, it means that there’s a danger of my podcasts being drowned out.

    • Francisco
      May 3, 2012, 2:04 am | # | Reply

      Maybe the correct question she should ask herself is:

      “What is it about exercising/gyms that I don’t like?”

      If she could find somewhere/somehow to address that/those negative point(s) then maybe she would find that she likes exercising?

      • Sonicthunder
        May 3, 2012, 9:24 am | #

        Well, Kevin may have an idea why…
        http://wapsisquare.com/comic/05122005/

      • Dave
        May 3, 2012, 6:11 pm | #

        I see the hidden hand of Tepoz in that particular disaster. “Pulque smash!”

  6. Atomic
    May 3, 2012, 2:03 am | # | Reply

    The beginning — admitting you have a problem…

    And, having attended my next to last live model art class just yesterday, may I congratulate you on a fine (if large) example of a normal braless breast! Superb attention to anatomy details throughout – arms/hands/shoulder position, etc, etc. The Monica model may be an exaggeration, but not by much! Salute!

    • Maark30
      May 3, 2012, 11:51 am | # | Reply

      True, Paul has shown the utmost care when it comes to showing realism to the large breasted community. The last thing he would want is for the readership to just think he was aiming for a mindless T&A comic. He obviously is aiming for a goal here. First with Tina and now with Monica. We just have to sit and wait for the ride to get to the next drop.

  7. Qalypso
    May 3, 2012, 2:03 am | # | Reply

    What’s the male analogue of anorexia nervosa, except, for 98 lb. weaklings? Body image problems can really mess you up and too many jock coaches may not treat it with the, ahh, delicate touch that a pschrink might…

    • Casey
      May 3, 2012, 2:09 am | # | Reply

      Both men and women can have anorexia. The rate is just a bit higher among women.

      • JeffEpp
        May 3, 2012, 2:53 am | #

        And, anorexia is linked to OCD, as many psychological problems turn out to do. And that, in turn, comes from anxiety attacks that set off fight or flight instincts. Monica may be using food as her ritual, hence the term “comfort food”.

        The “opposite” of anorexia is sometimes called “bigorexia”. It is when someone has the “not muscular enough” body issue. It really is the same kind of thing, but instead of not eating, the obsession is to put more muscle on.

      • Phil
        May 3, 2012, 4:58 am | #

        They’re both specific forms of body dysmorphic disorder. BDD is often coupled with another mental disorder, such as agoraphobia or clinical depression, among others, and they interinfluence eachother.

      • Kramegame
        May 3, 2012, 6:50 am | #

        Then there is the body image disorder that makes you uncomfortable with having the same look for an extended period of time. I knew someone who went from being a twig, to being ridiculously fat, to trim it to super muscular, then losing that muscle to be a twiggy “scene kid” again, within the span of 2-3 years, all on purpose, because he didn’t like the way he was shaped.

  8. shadowinthelight
    May 3, 2012, 2:09 am | # | Reply

    The added dimension from the shading really makes Monica pop out psuedo 3D style in panel 2. I am glad Paul decided to go back to the typed text though.

  9. Erik
    May 3, 2012, 2:16 am | # | Reply

    Breasts bigger, cravings for food? Is anyone thinking what I’m thinking?

    • shadowinthelight
      May 3, 2012, 2:40 am | # | Reply

      We’re about to embark on a 9 month story arc?

      • harukohoshiko
        May 3, 2012, 5:01 am | #

        OMG my smile can’t get any bigger than it is right now!

      • Yamara
        May 3, 2012, 6:02 am | #

        Those kinds of story arcs tend to last quite a bit longer than 9 months.

    • Justa Wud Turner
      May 3, 2012, 10:13 am | # | Reply

      There’s been no reports of her holding onto the private library seat in the morning…

      • Danzier
        May 3, 2012, 5:09 pm | #

        From experience, that would come about four months into the story arc. However, the wierd cravings would indicate we may already be in month two. 😉

      • Yamara
        May 3, 2012, 6:18 pm | #

        It would be a very appropriate development for the new style to usher in, I’ll say that.

      • Dave
        May 3, 2012, 9:12 pm | #

        A new reader could begin to suspect that Mr. Taylor might, just possibly, be feeding in a plausible set of red-herring clues and hints, leading us to reasonable speculation in a direction other than the one in which he’s actually intending to go, and is planning to spring an entirely-unpredicted surprise on us within the next week or three (which would, naturally, prove to be entirely consistent in hindsight).

        More experienced readers know, of course, that it’d never happen that way around here. Not even once. Ever. Even slightly. Just not possible.

        I’m not even taking bets on this one 🙂

      • Yamara
        May 3, 2012, 10:31 pm | #

        Hm, month two…

        May + 7 months = December.

        2012.

      • Ratcatcher
        May 4, 2012, 6:01 am | #

        Yamara (later)- And on Dec ** 2012 Monicas world undergoes a ‘Polar’ shift and is never the same. Hmm . . . Could be.

      • bmonk
        May 4, 2012, 12:25 pm | #

        Yamara, are you saying that, now that the calendar machine is shut down, Monica will explode to end the world?

    • Michelle
      May 3, 2012, 7:52 pm | # | Reply

      Yep. Preggers. Oh boy?

    • Dave
      May 3, 2012, 9:02 pm | # | Reply

      Is anyone thinking what I’m thinking?

      I think so! But, if Nudge is going to be the demigodmother, who’s going to be the demigodfather?

      • scantrontb
        May 3, 2012, 10:57 pm | #

        Tepoz? or maybe Kukulcan? they’re the only two male semi-deities around that we’ve heard of so far, every other male is mortal and mundane (in the “extra-special or not” sense of the word) while Deitzl IS extra-special, he unfortunately isn’t a deity… oh well…

  10. BikerScum
    May 3, 2012, 2:34 am | # | Reply

    Ok, I really am this type A.

    First word balloon. “shity” should have 2 “T”s……

  11. Francisco
    May 3, 2012, 2:53 am | # | Reply

    I suspect that Monica would try sexercise first because she doesn’t like regular exercise. However, whilst it’s better than no exercise it shouldn’t be taken as a complete solution.

  12. NOTDilbert
    May 3, 2012, 3:27 am | # | Reply

    I can’t remember – isn’t Bud a dance instructor? That’s also good exercise – anything that gets you moving aerobicly.

    Bud doesn’t work at Punk Yoga also. does she?

    • NOTDilbert
      May 3, 2012, 3:31 am | # | Reply

      Also – we crave sugars and fats because they are so good at providing calories. When we were developing into hunter/gatherers, concentrated sources of sugars and fats were relatively rare in nature. Now they’re everywhere – and our instincts are killing us.

    • Francisco
      May 3, 2012, 3:47 am | # | Reply

      She does her dance instructing at Punk Yoga.

      • Maark30
        May 3, 2012, 3:15 pm | #

        Afraid not, she works at another dance studio. Joanne’s Elite or somesuch name.

      • Francisco
        May 4, 2012, 1:28 am | #

        If you’re right then I haven’t made as many trips through the archives as I thought I had.

      • Fairportfan
        May 4, 2012, 2:16 am | #

        Nah. Remember when Kevin came in and nobody but Bud recognised him? Also we see her giving lessons to little old ladies, who i sort of doubt would be among the clientèle at Punk Yoga.

  13. Phil
    May 3, 2012, 4:50 am | # | Reply

    Does anybody actually talk to themselves this much?

    • nova
      May 3, 2012, 8:36 am | # | Reply

      I do, all the time! 🙂

    • bmonk
      May 3, 2012, 10:22 am | # | Reply

      I’d reply–but I already told myself, so I don’t need to tell anyone else. 😀

    • Sheik
      May 3, 2012, 5:08 pm | # | Reply

      I think there may be a circuit missing from the human brain, at least in some people, including me.
      I’ve found that actually hearing the words somehow makes the thought more real and understandable, and somehow more memorable.
      Perhaps the thought becomes more important if it’s heard?

      • bmonk
        May 3, 2012, 7:38 pm | #

        I think it helps make thoughts more specific and defined, and also–especially for writers–helps make them more natural sounding and intelligible.

    • Danzier
      May 3, 2012, 5:11 pm | # | Reply

      Authors (like me) talk to ourselves all the time. Something about talking does, indeed, help cement the thoughts, and when developing storylines it can be very useful.

  14. Ohnhai
    May 3, 2012, 5:06 am | # | Reply

    Really lovin the new look:)

  15. Justa Wud Turner
    May 3, 2012, 5:30 am | # | Reply

    Dammit, take your dog for a walk twice a day, your back yard will appreciate it…

    • IS_Wolf
      May 3, 2012, 6:33 am | # | Reply

      So will Dietzel, considering he’s prone to accidents if not taken walkies enough, or that there aren’t any toilets nearby so he can go by himself.

      • Maark30
        May 3, 2012, 12:01 pm | #

        In all fairness to Dietzel, that one time may have been more that the GG’s literally scared the piss out of him. We have seen him use the bathroom at Daren’s bar when he was watching him before.

    • Wyvern
      May 3, 2012, 5:15 pm | # | Reply

      I think that’s a good idea; Dietzel can take Monica for a walk. It’s up to him whether to put a leash on her.

      • Justa Wud Turner
        May 3, 2012, 8:14 pm | #

        Is M into collars and leashes?

      • Maark30
        May 3, 2012, 11:30 pm | #

        She seems more the harness type than collar.

      • Ratcatcher
        May 4, 2012, 6:05 am | #

        Maark30- Hook it to the back of her bra, then Diezel can use the blades or a board for a change.

  16. Jayessell
    May 3, 2012, 6:25 am | # | Reply

    Because Diezel is semi-sapient, all Monica has to do is issue a non-revocable command that he see that she exercises twice a day.
    WALKIES!

  17. Hdlichtner
    May 3, 2012, 6:32 am | # | Reply

    I had a moment like this a few years ago…I was newly 21, 6’2″, 265 lbs and got winded walking up a flight of stairs. Within a year I dropped 70 lbs, and now I’m a fully certified personal trainer from the National Personal Training Institute, and I start my professional career as one this upcoming Saturday. I wish it hadn’t gotten to a point like today’s strip, but I kinda owe my life to this kind of harsh realization.

  18. War
    May 3, 2012, 6:39 am | # | Reply

    Sounds like someone will be joining a certain punk yoga/dance studio soon…

    Cardio- running and jumping jacks for example- for the large chested is a pain, uncountable and expensive when you factor in all the damn bras you go through (and that’s just the cheap shitty ones).

    Yoga/palliates may be awkward/weird and frustrating but at least you are not bouncing- just bending.

    I think Zumba/dance would be the work out for her- bouncy yes but it’s *not* running. There is also swimming…

    • Kessog
      May 3, 2012, 7:10 pm | # | Reply

      Pound for pound, swimming and resistance walking (in water) are probably the best workouts ever. Do it hard or easy, your choice.
      Hmm, maybe something I should look into…

  19. buckykatt
    May 3, 2012, 7:10 am | # | Reply

    Not so crazy about the new 3-D look the past few days, with the shading and highlights. I know artists like to keep moving ahead, but the old style was much cleaner and more appealing. My $0.02.

    • davids4250
      May 3, 2012, 7:58 am | # | Reply

      Agree.

    • starkruzr
      May 3, 2012, 9:43 am | # | Reply

      Disagree. :p I think this is gorgeous, adds subtlety, subtracts nothing.

  20. W.
    May 3, 2012, 7:25 am | # | Reply

    Some of the problem with execise programs is that they can be boring. Monica happens to know a lot of people that make their living making exercise fun. Punk Yoga should fill the bill. A Yoga class would be a very good way to jump start her execise program. For aerobics she should probably swim or bike ride or even ballroom dance. Dare I mention weight training? With the right instructor all these can be interesting and fun.

    • W.
      May 3, 2012, 3:22 pm | # | Reply

      Speaking of fun and exercise, there was an advertisement on TV where a mother had her adolescent daughter running all over the house looking for the mother’s wallet so she could borrow some money from her. This is the kind of thing I imagine Nudge would do, so I colored her.

      • Wyvern
        May 3, 2012, 5:18 pm | #

        Supposedly a mom headed out on a weekend trip left a note for her teenager: “I’ve left you $100 for food and emergencies. I hid it somewhere in your room; if you clean your room you’ll find it.”

      • W.
        May 3, 2012, 5:55 pm | #

        Sounds really sneaky. This is the one I was thinking of: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyqSHzIy0Q8

      • Kessog
        May 3, 2012, 7:12 pm | #

        Nice! Spiffy highlights.

  21. GrumbleBear
    May 3, 2012, 9:12 am | # | Reply

    I would have to say that Monica has, all of a sudden, come to an extreme sense of her own mortality. She may or may not be pregnant and the idea that her boobs might have “dropped” or sagged is not what’s really bothering her.

    Some days, people can wake up and realize their time left on Earth is precious and not to be wasted.

    Of course, I may be projecting my thoughts onto Monica here…

    • GrumbleBear
      May 3, 2012, 9:13 am | # | Reply

      Well, damn. now I want donuts!!

    • Dave
      May 3, 2012, 10:12 am | # | Reply

      It sounds like another step along the road of maturity. Starting to be concerned about the future is one definition of “the point of becoming an adult”. So is realizing that you aren’t immortal… that you will eventually die, someday.

      Really feeling that That Day is going to come a lot sooner than “eventually”… and that your own actions and choices have some responsibility for that but cannot prevent it… well, that’s a pretty good definition of “midlife crisis”.

  22. kingklash
    May 3, 2012, 9:24 am | # | Reply

    Just start simple. More walks in the park. Bench press the dog. Learn some kind of boob-centric martial art.

    Besides, the more fit she makes herself, the faster and farther she can outrun whatever her friends stir up.

  23. The Old Wolf
    May 3, 2012, 9:31 am | # | Reply

    Shemomedjamo (Georgian)
    “”Shemomedjamo” is the act of eating to the point where your body says, “OK, we did it! We’re all done now,” and then muscling through another three steaks.”

  24. ziggy78eog
    May 3, 2012, 10:23 am | # | Reply

    Well, Monica, are you not the lucky one who has a friend who runs/teaches Yoga, who just happens to employ another friend of yours who just happens to be a physical trainer? All you need to do is pick up the phone.

  25. Vorlonagent
    May 3, 2012, 10:24 am | # | Reply

    The biggest problem I’ve found with shit is that it doesn’t want to stay sorted. It requires constant maintenance to stay sorted whereas most people can at least get by just letting it do whatever.

  26. g.b.
    May 3, 2012, 10:58 am | # | Reply

    i was going to comment on this yesterday, but i hope we don’t find out that m. is pregnant.

  27. Glass_skunk
    May 3, 2012, 11:51 am | # | Reply

    She should be happy, at least shes thin! I have all these same problems but with the fat to prove it!

  28. Maark30
    May 3, 2012, 12:19 pm | # | Reply

    Adding to my already noticable thought that Tina and Monica are setting up an arc for themselves and their diets, Tina and Monica seem to both have a thing for baked goodies (http://wapsisquare.com/comic/do-the-eyes/) and a noticing that they need to take better care of their bodies (http://wapsisquare.com/comic/in-layers/).

  29. Pamala5768
    May 3, 2012, 12:31 pm | # | Reply

    Perhaps this will lead to spending more time with Kevin so some of his healthy habits can influence her choices.

  30. Yamara
    May 3, 2012, 12:47 pm | # | Reply

    To save themselves, Tina and Monica will soon come the same conclusion:

    Becky must die.

    • Atomic
      May 3, 2012, 1:14 pm | # | Reply

      Snerk!

      NowTHERE’s a plot twist!

      • Yamara
        May 3, 2012, 2:00 pm | #

        They use their demonic and teleportation powers to gaslight her into taking the wrong meds.

        But only after they frame her for poisoning the Minnesota supply of fattening pastries.

        M: It’s not enough that you go down. You have to take all HFCS in the Midwest down with you.

        B: But–Tina! You’re my friend! Why? Why!? You said you loved my pastries!!

        T: no i said your pastries may have started the trojan war. HELEN LOST, BECKY

      • Dave
        May 3, 2012, 2:48 pm | #

        *chuckle*

        Isn’t there a more direct and less-potentially-harmful way available?

        Tina could use her demonic powers of influence to compel Becky to give up making pastries, and instead hire on as an obsessively-compulsive personal trainer and diet adviser at Punk Yoga.

        Imagine the potential for nagging which would result! “OK. Drop and give me twenty! Twenty more! Twenty more! Twenty more! Twenty more! …”

      • Danzier
        May 3, 2012, 5:15 pm | #

        You can’t poison the supply of fattyness up here. It’s in the air. I swear.

        Nom nom cheese brats nom…

      • Yamara
        May 3, 2012, 9:00 pm | #

        Yeah, I am actually witness to that. Driving north through Wisconsin for a GenCon, there were signs boasting of the state being Cheese Capital of the World right in front of some overpass that was, itself, exclusively a dining area. So there I was speeding underneath dozens of heavyset Midwesterners devouring cheese in the air above me.

        People in the 22nd Century are going to read that on the descendant of the Internet Archive and go, “The hell was up with these people?”

      • bmonk
        May 3, 2012, 3:54 pm | #

        Then they can poit onto the Enterprise, and make sure that Wesley Must Die.

      • Yamara
        May 3, 2012, 4:27 pm | #

        Oh, well, if we’re killing off Trekverse characters, Neelix is first on the list!

        Though I admit it was insightful how ST:V proved that sadism has a corner in every human heart, when that episode where Neelix had lost his lungs was on, and I simply nodded, my mind as calm as a summer lake, thinking, “Yes. Pull the plug.”

  31. Centaur12
    May 3, 2012, 2:57 pm | # | Reply

    If that’s what Mona calls fat and outta shape, I WANNA BE HER!!! (she doesn’t KNOW what fat and outta shape looks like…) 😉

    • Paul Taylor
      May 3, 2012, 3:27 pm | # | Reply

      M said “skinny and out of shape” and she said her tummy feels “spongy”, basically no muscle tone whatsoever. 😉

    • Yamara
      May 3, 2012, 3:38 pm | # | Reply

      I appreciate the poetry of the phrase “skinny and out of shape”, but it can be equally obscuring as it is enlightening: It looks like a problem worth having!

      Monica is skinny and unfit. She’s been able to deny it because of youth and metabolism, but the tensile strength of her skin is beginning to surrender to all the clotty fat that is, after all, gathering there.

      Having that much grease hanging right off of her heart is mighty sobering once she dares to think about it.

      • Yamara
        May 3, 2012, 3:39 pm | #

        That was an explication directed at Centaur, not a corrective at the artiste. 🙂

    • Kessog
      May 3, 2012, 7:18 pm | # | Reply

      Kind of like the movie Run Fatboy Run where he responds: I’m not FAT, I’m not FIT!

  32. Sgt. Howard
    May 3, 2012, 3:51 pm | # | Reply

    Little Mamasita, pull off that top, push those two massive mammeries aside and examine your belly through the cleavage. You are looking for a racing stripe that starts at the top of your thatch, splits at your belly button and rejoins to travel to the base of your middle ribcage (Xyphoid process of the sternum). Given your ethnicity, it should be fairly noticable. Also note the same darkening of tone around your eyes and possibly even a line down the middle of your forehead. Do you see it? Hmmmm… thought so. Now, hold one of your boobs close to an ear and wobble it a bit- do you hear sloshing noises? I see… and your body suddenly craves complex sugars and mega carbs? Uh huh… OK cupcake…. when was your last menstral cycle? Has it been more than a month? And you are sudenly very AWARE of your body, more so than normal…?
    (the Old Sgt. Shakes his head and grins, walks over to the easy chair and sits down without another word)

  33. Sheik
    May 3, 2012, 5:24 pm | # | Reply

    I don’t see what the problem is here.
    All M has to do is consult the Punk Yoga staff on what an appropriate level of exercise for her would be and then tell Tina to tell her to do it.
    And like it.

    • Yamara
      May 3, 2012, 6:13 pm | # | Reply

      Every day. Consistently.

      For the rest of her life.

      Piece of cake!

      …

      D’oh!

  34. as363
    May 3, 2012, 9:53 pm | # | Reply

    Looking forward to see how this ties in with some of the previous days presentations . Should be interesting ..

  35. GreyWolf
    May 3, 2012, 11:48 pm | # | Reply

    Funny the topic is exercise because as I was catching up on last couple days’ strips (was busy on my off days this time, sowwy) my first thought was how exercise basically makes our bodies respond to minor muscle damage (aka “the burn” that tells you that you did it right) by building/upgrading muscle tissue.

    So Monica’s breasts are responding to “the burn” of being used TWICE as landing gear following emergency poit incidents recently by increasing the padding level. And being dragged across carpeting with her weight behind them, that’s GOTTA make the skin sag a bit even more than it usually would due to age.

    The sheer mass alone is punishment on the skin trying to hold those things up. The recent abuse is probably accelerating the process.

    Oh, and for the record – I am what they used to call a “tiny titty man” – I am actually into the smaller sizes, for various reasons which I won’t go into here. So anyone who might think I read this strip beacause of “fan service” or M’s breast size – wrong! You could actually say I became a fan in *spite* of her breast size. 😉

    Which is a compliment to Paul’s work. Kudos.

  36. Joe Minotaur
    May 4, 2012, 12:25 am | # | Reply

    Tonight’s not-so-random Wapsi Square link:
    http://wapsisquare.com/comic/a-game-of-chess/

    • Joe Minotaur
      May 4, 2012, 1:22 am | # | Reply

      Quote for tonight: “You can never prove that something does not exist. You can only prove that it does.”

  37. chicgeek
    May 4, 2012, 1:34 am | # | Reply

    I’m not so sure going to punk rock yoga is a good idea. Feeling bad about the shape of her body, dreading/resenting the need to exercise, placing yourself in the hands of friends instead of an impartial instructor elsewhere? It’ll either work, or blow up spectacularly.
    And I hated gym, too. Teacher picked two pets, they chose teams-for everything-and always being along the last chosen, knowing no one wants you there? Jeez, they could have divided the class into two groups alphabetically! We aren’t all graceful and athletic, especially at that age.
    Anyway. I like the art, just need to get used to the change!
    Even if Monica is pregnant, that doesn’t invalidate her realization that she’s not in great shape. You can be skinny and have no muscle tone! But what will really be amusing if she’s pregnant? Her realizing she needs to cut back on coffee. ^_^

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