Wapsi Square

Slice of supernatural life YA comic PG-13 to R
  • Home
  • About
  • Book Store
  • Bluesky
  • Twitch
  • Forum
  • Archive
DeviantART pinterest YouTube RSS
"Will Be Poited"
<< First < Prev 144Comments Next > Last >>
Will Be Poited
<< FIrst < Prev Random 144Comments Next > Last >>

Friends

  • Dumbing of Age
  • OGLAF (NSFW)
  • Something Positive
Buy Me A Coffee

Mastodon

Latest Medusa Comic

Will Be Poited

by Paul Taylor on May 10, 2012 at 12:00 am
Story: Wapsi-Archive
Comments RSS

Discussion (144) ¬

  1. davids4250
    May 10, 2012, 12:03 am | # | Reply

    I do believe Monica is mildly perturbed.

    • Stigmartyr762
      May 10, 2012, 1:15 am | # | Reply

      Mildly? The girls about to have a psychotic &@#%in episode.

    • Ghostie
      May 10, 2012, 2:43 pm | # | Reply

      Just a touch. Nor can I really blame her. I’m not like her, but I can see where she’s coming from.

  2. Maark30
    May 10, 2012, 12:04 am | # | Reply

    And now she gets to what is REALLY bothering her. And she ought to know just about everything about active volcanoes by nownow

    • Maark30
      May 10, 2012, 12:05 am | # | Reply

      Great, now my keyboard has O.C.D.

      • scantrontb
        May 10, 2012, 12:11 am | #

        Nope… C.D.O. in Alphabetical order… THE WAY IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE…! 😀

      • Siarles
        May 10, 2012, 1:02 am | #

        When did wanting things to be orderly become the definition of OCD? I hate when people make light of serious topics. The whole point of it being labeled a disorder is that it’s debilitating; they are mentally (physically?) incapable of ignoring it.

        Normally, I’d let this go, but it makes it seem worse when you do it right after finding out that not only one of the characters but the author has OCD.

        …and now I feel like one of those annoying people who rages about stuff they have no business talking about.

      • Maark30
        May 10, 2012, 2:29 am | #

        Sorry, but I do have OCD.

      • Sanj
        May 10, 2012, 2:31 am | #

        Oh no, no I appreciate it. I have OCD and I’m well past tired of how often it’s made light of or made a joke of in popular culture. When I hear people say lightly, “Oh, I’m a little OCD about that,” I want to counter with “Yeah, and I’m a little autistic about such and such.” If you can make light of my disability, why can’t I make fun of someone else’s? Oh wait, that’s right, but autism isn’t hur-hur funny they have to wash their hands all the time.

        …ranting…

      • Julie
        May 10, 2012, 8:13 am | #

        It may not be the definition of OCD, but it is sometimes one of the symptoms. My friends who have OCD are “neat and orderly” fiends.

      • illiad
        May 10, 2012, 8:48 am | #

        GUYS!!!! the first stage about handling this problem, is making a funny about it!!!!!!

        now stop being so damned serious, and cheer up for {{insert diety}} ‘s sake!!!!! 🙂

      • Maark30
        May 10, 2012, 9:53 am | #

        I’m sorry if I made it seem that I don’t see your point, I do and appreciate it. I have just gotten into the habit of calling my little mistakes, like my typo, as the spreading of my condition to other things I handle. (End counter rant ;-p)

      • Siarles
        May 11, 2012, 3:15 am | #

        @Maark30: I was mostly reacting to the “CDO” joke. Sorry. :/

      • GreyWolf
        May 10, 2012, 3:04 am | #

        Better to be OCD than COD? Sorry, couldn’t resist.

      • Rowan Hawthorn
        May 10, 2012, 7:35 am | #

        Either one is better than DOA…

      • Maark30
        May 10, 2012, 9:48 am | #

        That’s the spirit.

    • bmonk
      May 10, 2012, 4:47 pm | # | Reply

      In the spirit of this thread, and to pay for the puns hiding, if they are, I will personally put $10 into the pun jar.

      In pennies.

      One at a time.

      Listening for the clink from each one.

      • scantrontb
        May 10, 2012, 9:32 pm | #

        you’ll be there for a loooong time… no bottom for them to hit and get an echo from.

  3. Dave
    May 10, 2012, 12:06 am | # | Reply

    So, squirrels are the anti-pizza?

    I thought I remembered Dietzel tormenting squirrels by throwing snowballs at them… perhaps they’ve found an inventive way to take revenge somehow?

    And, yes, M does seem to be quite serious about getting her point across today.

    • illiad
      May 10, 2012, 12:21 pm | # | Reply

      I dont see pizza there.. Just scared of revenge attacks, it seems… :/

  4. scantrontb
    May 10, 2012, 12:08 am | # | Reply

    Oh Good… I was kinda dreading this day if (from yesterdays viewpoint) that OTB would come in and have to arrest Monica because she was threatening Tina with bodily harm… then after M got out of jail, she talks it over with Shelly, who by now has heard of this “Pixie-With-A-Rack” that had to be taken away before she killed somebody from Justin, and then they sit and compare notes… hilarity ensues… By the way… has Justin / OTB ever MET Monica? I’m not sure myself, but i don’t think so??

    • jwhouk
      May 10, 2012, 8:22 am | # | Reply

      She knows about Justin, but has not met him (that we know of).

      • scantrontb
        May 10, 2012, 9:34 pm | #

        Right, which means that he wouldn’t recognize her as Shelly’s friend, and blah, blah, what i said originally…

  5. Atomic
    May 10, 2012, 12:09 am | # | Reply

    A bit early for a mid-life crisis, but — considering all she’s been through — not impossible, either.

    • Dave
      May 10, 2012, 8:03 am | # | Reply

      Her comments last week did include a certain element of “I’m not so young any more” so I’d say this could qualify.

    • Julie
      May 10, 2012, 8:15 am | # | Reply

      It’s just PM(l)C…Pre-Mid-life-Crisis. 🙂

      • Dave
        May 10, 2012, 8:49 am | #

        Heh… a bit like Retief’s careful selection of the proper diplomatic garb to wear to an early late midafternoon reception?

      • Kessog
        May 10, 2012, 4:52 pm | #

        Keith Laumer reference! Win!
        Currently reading The Lighter Side.

  6. Fayili
    May 10, 2012, 12:26 am | # | Reply

    Thank you for these. People really don’t get it. And when you get pre-period soreness and even HOLDING your boobs to keep them from bouncing hurts, and you just want it to stop, and for people to shut up, and for your boobs to go away… Yeah.

    Not to mention that, even when your shape doesn’t change much, when you don’t exercise for a few months and you can feel how unhealthy you are, and people say, “Oh, you’re fine, you don’t need to bother,” and it just feeds into the reinforcement so you *don’t* exercise, and you feel more like crap…

    So, yeah. Thanks for these.

    • Maark30
      May 10, 2012, 9:56 am | # | Reply

      This is one good reason why I think that Paul is probably one of the best advocates of the large chested woman around.

    • Danzier
      May 10, 2012, 7:49 pm | # | Reply

      Agree to both.

      Nothing fits right, because large chest often pairs with large waist in clothing (but not vice versa, grrrr). It’s hard to feel pretty or self-assured when you’re absolutely certain that everyone looks at you and sees an ideal instead of a reality. And then you get people wondering if you’re trying to scam your insurance for chiropractors or any other medical issue, because they don’t SEE … You.

      • GreyWolf
        May 10, 2012, 11:25 pm | #

        Here’s one for you to ponder. I once read a while back a post from a guy who was a true transvestite, right down to liking wearing lingerie (but, as if to prove Eddie Izzard’s point, was very heterosexual and had a very hot girlfriend). His post?

        That he found it very strange that lingerie sold nowadays fit him better than any woman he had ever see try it on, and wanted to know if Frederick’s and Victoria’s were even making them for *women* anymore.

  7. zacharaiaha
    May 10, 2012, 12:28 am | # | Reply

    So Monica does have a way to dispose of the bodies! Lucky Monica. Not only that she doesn’t have to fill out the papwerwork either. If we send her a list how much will it cost for her to act on it??

    Sing along time –
    .
    Making a list,
    .
    checking it twice.
    .
    Gonna decide who’s naughty or nice.
    .

    • My2Cents
      May 10, 2012, 12:38 am | # | Reply

      I prefer the executioners song from the Mikado: http://math.boisestate.edu/gas/mikado/webopera/mk105a.html

      As some day it may happen that a victim must be found,
      I’ve got a little list — I’ve got a little list
      Of society offenders who might well be underground,
      And who never would be missed — who never would be missed!
      . . .

      • Fallon
        May 10, 2012, 4:15 am | #

        that song would be my preference too. 🙂

    • kingklash
      May 10, 2012, 8:58 am | # | Reply

      Monica’s her own Death Note?

      • Yamara
        May 10, 2012, 8:06 pm | #

        I was going to say.

        Yes. Yes she is.

  8. Joe Minotaur
    May 10, 2012, 12:38 am | # | Reply

    She’s not OCD! She’s T.S.F.H.B.
    Too Sexy For Her Blouse!

  9. Phil
    May 10, 2012, 12:44 am | # | Reply

    I can’t feel any sympathy for Monica right now.

    When -normal- people eat unhealthily and are out of shape, they get a paunch. If it’s so horrible to be out of shape and have huge tits then get in shape. But don’t expect ANY sympathy from the people who have to work out to look hot or the people who don’t work out and don’t look hot.

    • Zorlond
      May 10, 2012, 1:10 am | # | Reply

      My lack of sympathy is a little different. ‘No body, no crime’? So the only thing holding Monica back from doing things is fear of punishment? Downright sociopathic.

      • Col
        May 10, 2012, 1:25 am | #

        I think Monica is referring to a common adage about how policing is conducted. I don’t know any specifics, just that I’ve heard the phrase before. I don’t think she’s being held back by fear of punishment though.

      • Dave
        May 10, 2012, 1:25 am | #

        I think she’s engaging in a bit of mock-threatening rhetoric out of sheer frustration… it isn’t a serious statement of how she feels or thinks.

        We don’t arrest every football fan who shouts “Moider da bums!” for solicitation of homicide. Same principle, I think.

      • War
        May 10, 2012, 1:41 am | #

        The only thing holding her back is fear in general. She’s not the only person who grew up being ridiculed and tormented to the point of it having a lasting crippling affect. We’ve *all* gone through that.

        You can self medicate on partying, ignoring it or putting on masks all you want but you will eventually the point you either need to place it, trace it and face it or up the dosage to the point it destroys you.

        I’ve seen too many people choose the up the dosage and keep going with their shallow surface lives while behind their masks they were still crying as I go through the place it, trace it and face it to feel sorry for her, or anyone starting that path.

        You can let fear tell you how to live or you can tell yourself how to live.

        In the end, you are the only one who can improve yourself.

    • War
      May 10, 2012, 1:21 am | # | Reply

      Thank you for enforcing the body hate double standards we are all sick of and missing the point of what she is saying.

      “I feel no sympathy because the fat goes straight to her boobs and she still looks hot. She should stop bitch and just get into shape because it’s that easy.”

      “People with paunchy, flabby bodies are fat and disgusting and should be ashamed of their bodies. Obviously they don’t work out enoghf, eat too much and it’s their own fault.”

      “Skinny people have it so easy!”

      “Fat people have it so hard!”

      “Nobody cares as long as long as they see big tits and no paunch so stop bitching because you didn’t have to work for that body!”

      I mean really. -_- You missed the entire point of what she’s been saying in the last few strips.

      Please, keep objectifying, judging and writing off people by their bodies and keep the body shame alive.

      • Phil
        May 10, 2012, 4:44 am | #

        Oh no, people are making assumptions about me based on my appearances that I object to. I surely do bet that this never happens to other people, especially not fat people. Double especially not fat people with genetic issues, or average people who have to slave away to keep average or uptight gym-bunnies who have to slave away to keep looking the way they want to.

      • Yamara
        May 10, 2012, 5:47 am | #

        You’re the one who floated the word “normal”, with emphasis. Care to define that for everyone on Earth?

      • Paul Taylor
        May 10, 2012, 5:30 pm | #

        Indeed, Phil. And why are you getting you panties in a knot about Monica? She never said that “fat” people have it easier than her, she’s upset that people are judging her by her appearance alone, automatically assuming she has it easy.

      • illiad
        May 10, 2012, 12:54 pm | #

        ooooo, 🙁 ouchie on that link…. :/

      • Kessog
        May 10, 2012, 4:59 pm | #

        The need to hang that at every gym and high school in the country!

    • Col
      May 10, 2012, 1:42 am | # | Reply

      Out of curiosity, what is your definition of “normal”? Statistically, the average breast size has increased over the past few decades, so “normal” 50 years ago was a B cup, but now “normal” (if you are taking a statistical average to be normal) is a full C cup.

      Also, why do the people in these narrow categories get the ability to ask for sympathy? Monica’s been handed a body type that’s difficult to deal with, despite the fact that society says it’s beautiful (remember that some societies have also called bound feet beautiful, so let’s not call society’s rule the end-all decision maker, shall we?) She is showing that she wants to fix her problem, which in my opinion, makes her better than the people that hate their bodies but never do anything about it. Those are the people I can’t stand and have no sympathy for 😛

    • Nitty_in_the_desert
      May 10, 2012, 2:37 am | # | Reply

      I’m not saying that people who are fat aren’t treated worse, and I’m not skinny myself, but as a girl who grew up with huge breasts, your comment just seems jerky. So, if you think someone is attractive, any problems they have with their body are meaningless, because you find them attractive. You do realize that after having everyone in gym class, teacher included make fun of you for “looking like a blow-up doll” or “being liable to put someone’s eye out”, for eight years, one becomes more than a bit self-conscious and averse to using the gym.

      And hey, having people treat you like a like a sex symbol is a good thing right. You act like a scientist/good employee, they see sex symbol. You act like a person who had a bad day and just wants to be left alone, they see sex symbol. You start a conversation, obviously that’s an invitation to leer. You wear a dress, you’re clearly throwing yourself at everyone and deserve what you get. After all, if you wanted to be taken seriously, “you’d put those things away” (how exactly?).

      Maybe you’re not thinking any of this, but you sure seem to be saying you have no pity for someone who you think is hot because they give more of a crap about their healthy than whether other people are turned on and aren’t looking forward to being a walking talking joke while they try to get healthy.

      • Fallon
        May 10, 2012, 4:22 am | #

        Huzzah and THANK YOU!!! War & Nitty – You said that better than I’ve heard in a long time! I wanna hugs you.

      • Julie
        May 10, 2012, 8:24 am | #

        What Fallon said.

        @Phil- While I can understand the frustrations of an overweight person (who is genetically inclined to be that way without a serious diet and exercise regimen) seeing a thin person complain about themselves, I also understand that everyone has a right to be frustrated with their bodies…especially in the name of becoming healthier.

        It’s a serious case of “the grass is always greener.” Fat people want to be skinny. Skinny people question whether they are healthy (or should be skinnier…or tanner…or whatever). Big breasted women wish they didn’t have to carry the load they do (or pay for specialty bras and clothing). Small breasted women wish for implants…or more attention.

        The number of people who are truly happy exactly as they are is unfortunately small. Most people will find something about themselves they don’t enjoy or that truly needs improvement, and they have as much right to complain about it as those of us who have to take serious steps to approach “healthy” weights.

    • Yamara
      May 10, 2012, 6:09 am | # | Reply

      @Phil – War puts it well, but your comment is just racks of women’s magazines and hours of copycat ‘reality’ shows talking. Why do you think a relative handful of people cause them to exist? Too bad that even M wold be challenged to rid the world of all that poisonous media.

      @Zorlond – We were speculating yesterday whether Tina Guzman, having died, could really be murdered, all off of M’s threat of beating her with a coffee cup. Seems she was already ahead of us with the volcano. We’re real people discussing murder, she’s a character. Why are you worried about her being sociopathic?

      More seriously, and about the characters, M has been struggling with this issue since the earliest days of the strip, and she now has the twin neuroses of having been tricked and attacked by her friends, and being outshined by them at nearly every turn. She’s mentioned to Phix and Shelly that she’s having problems coping with that.

      Casual threats of poit vengeance means she’s keeping open about it. But she truly is the most dangerous of the paranormals, with the possible exception of May. Monica can destroy the world, remember. And that capacity is never really more than a moment away from her mind.

      I think this is the real reason Euryale has been entangled in her life. M needs someone outside the crew that put a knife her head to watch her and make her feel good about herself. Gorgons don’t just make excellent guardians, they have more experience with being judged for their looks than almost any other creature of myth.

      tl;dr / in summa – Easy for readers to dismiss M’s issues, we can’t be annihilated by her if she goes of the rails.

  10. rufi
    May 10, 2012, 1:22 am | # | Reply

    I think I do sort of understand where Monica is coming from, but I would never make a point of whining about it when I haven’t done anything particularly to fix the problem. There are plenty of people out there who work out and eat less but simply have a tendency to gain weight moreso than lose it. So if you aren’t working at it, girl, then quit yer bitchin’ and do somethin’ about it!

    • Dave
      May 10, 2012, 1:33 am | # | Reply

      That’s part of why she’s so upset, I think. She’s feeling frustrated with herself for letting herself get into such poor condition… and then doubly frustrated because she’s running into a constant social message of “Hey, you have it good!” that is actively un-supporting her desire for healthy change.

      • huttj
        May 10, 2012, 1:57 am | #

        Dingdingding we have a winner! Give that bird a kewpie doll!

        Heh, one of my friends is like coatrack skinny. He’s actually unhealthily so, not due to any sort of eating disorder, or image issue, or anything intentional, but because his body has a LOT more difficulty putting on a healthy layer of build.

        Meanwhile I’m over here, well, not helping the geek stereotype. Sorry guys.

        But if you’re unhealthy, unfit, it doesn’t MATTER what you look like. ‘Out-of-shape’ is a bad word for it because it puts the focus on the shape rather than the capabilities (do you get winded going up a flight of steps?).

    • davids4250
      May 10, 2012, 2:12 am | # | Reply

      Rufi, remember that it was just this morning (her time) that Monica finally realized what terrible shape she is in. Only an hour or so ago. She’s still upset at herself for getting this way. She has not had a chance to do anything, yet.

      • Dave11
        May 10, 2012, 6:55 am | #

        She’s had times in the past where she’s gotten the determination to get in better shape, but it never lasts (the “Bicycle Staircase Incident” comes to mind). Hopefully this one will.

        As someone who struggles with the need to lose some weight and improve general health (I’m not obese, but I’m above my “healthy” weight range; my Cardiovascular system is in decent shape but I have near-zero muscle tone – lots of cycling, no weight work), I can sympathize with the not wanting to continue part of her recurring problem.

      • Julie
        May 10, 2012, 8:27 am | #

        Off topic comment- Dave, davids4250, and Dave11…that’s a lot of “Dave” in one comment string. O_O Maybe I’ve just missed this happening on a prior page, but that was weird to see all lined up…

      • huttj
        May 10, 2012, 10:43 am | #

        Dave’s not here, dude.

        (Sorry, couldn’t resist).

      • Kessog
        May 10, 2012, 5:10 pm | #

        This is Dave, look man…don’t…answer…the phone!

      • scantrontb
        May 10, 2012, 9:45 pm | #

        [British accent] They’re ALL dead Dave… Dave, They’re all DEAD… [/British accent]

      • IS_Wolf
        May 10, 2012, 11:02 pm | #

        I’m sorry Dave.
        I cannot let you do that…

      • kermit
        May 10, 2012, 9:38 am | #

        Whether it’s a not-quite young anymore adult realizing that she is truly unhealthy, or an alcoholic deciding that he needs to stop drinking, or a 30 year-old kid realizing that he seriously needs to get off his parents’ couch and get a life, there is that brief window when that person sees herself clearly, but has not yet decided exactly what to do about it. It is a time of energy and determination, if uncertainty.

        She should be able to say this to a friend and get encouragement. “Way to go! Try Shelly for exercise plans or classes; check with your scientist acquaintances for a good source on nutrition advice.”

        Unfortunately, she runs into Tina just as Tina has come to the exact same realization. Notice the barista’s subtext here: “I’m fat, and I just realized it!” Tina also feels that she isn’t getting acknowledgement and support from her friend.

    • zacharaiaha
      May 10, 2012, 2:19 am | # | Reply

      We have to remember Monica’s hypermetabolism. There is no way she will ever get fat. The energy to poit comes from somewhere and it is likely from her. So loads of food to fuel the generator. But she has a valid point that society equates skinny with ‘You’ve got nothing to complain about.’ That is winding her spring. When you have to use a hammer to get an idea into someones head and it still doesn’t work this is what happens.

      • Julie
        May 10, 2012, 8:27 am | #

        Ooo! I hadn’t thought about where the “energy to poit” came from. That’s a fair explanation for her ridiculous metabolism…

      • zacharaiaha
        May 10, 2012, 9:30 am | #

        Consistantly in Wapsi the rule is Nothing Comes For Free! SO the poit must have a cost. Where else than her. This can be applied to all the supernaturals in the strip. For the positive there is a negative, some big, some small and visa versa.
        .
        Cool. Don’t get to us that one in a sentance too often.

  11. T'laryth Phalyn
    May 10, 2012, 1:26 am | # | Reply

    Well, she’s got my sympathy. I’m not skinny but I’m not visibly overweight either and I have a pretty sizeable chest as well. I’m out of shape and when I run I find myself doing just what she describes (and getting too winded to properly yell at anyone who may be laughing). >.< And it's embarrassing like nothing else. I just wanna hug poor M!

    • Col
      May 10, 2012, 1:50 am | # | Reply

      I don’t have to hold the girls when I run (I’ve found ways to bind them effectively enough that nothing moves, lol). But stairs are another matter ^^; I’m always afraid someone will see me and think mean things. Honestly this is the first page in this little arc that feels relate-able to me. I’ve kind of been wanting her to get on with the gym thing (I mean, she has friends that own and work at a punk yoga studio, seems like a good place to start 😉 )

    • Julie
      May 10, 2012, 8:29 am | # | Reply

      There’s a reason I haven’t really run since 8th grade. I was in D-cups by age 14, and I didn’t discover legitimate sports bras until I was in my mid-20’s. Now I just don’t run because I’m out of shape…I need to fix that. 🙂

      • NOTDilbert
        May 10, 2012, 3:34 pm | #

        Bicycles, or, if you prefer the Gym, stationary bikes (my favorite is a stationary recumbent). Excersize with low impact, and with the recumbent, even a comfortable seat (men: no prostate-torturing traditional bike saddle!)

      • bmonk
        May 10, 2012, 5:19 pm | #

        Or, if you don’t mind water, doing laps, or even walking in water is highly effective, with low-impact and low-bounce, so it’s relatively easy on joints and parts that might sag.

      • Danzier
        May 10, 2012, 8:05 pm | #

        How do you balance the desire to do water aerobics (and suchlike) against “There are no swimsuits that fit me”? Regular aerobic activity has me grabbing my inhaler before I even break a sweat, so water activity would be nice… And apartments aren’t conducive to installing my own pool.

        I’m serious about this one; you guys’ suggestions are making me think maybe it’s not as hopeless as I’ve let myself think. Tyvm…

  12. semc
    May 10, 2012, 1:27 am | # | Reply

    Oh no, I’m arguing a bizarre and confusing point who’s point keeps shifting. Wait, what’s her point again? Is she arguing that she’s out of shape or that people tell her that she’s not out of shape when she is….? I’m so confused.

    Welcome readers to another case of Monica acting OOC because the artist has a bone to pick with people in the real world. Its mental assault and battery of the worst kind.

    • Roy
      May 10, 2012, 2:18 am | # | Reply

      It strikes me more as she’s point out proof that she’s out of shape to highlight that she’s sick and tired of people assuming she’s not out of shape merely because she’s skinny.

      The reason that she’s focusing on the general topic is likely explained by the fact that it wound up being the thought she woke up to. It’s like someone mentioning blue cars, and suddenly you find blue cars to be catching your attention.

    • Julie
      May 10, 2012, 8:31 am | # | Reply

      Huh…I haven’t had any trouble following this argument. Maybe it’s because I’m a woman? Then again…maybe you’re a woman too. *shrugs* Oh well. I guess I’m used to rambling conversations that go from A to Z without a logical course.

  13. semc
    May 10, 2012, 1:29 am | # | Reply

    Monica has become my least favorite character of all time. Whenever she’s in the comic I just end up skimming through them now to avoid being assaulted by stupid.

    I’m waiting for the real characters to return. Which is everyone but Jin, Monica, and their FB’s.

    • Julie
      May 10, 2012, 9:10 am | # | Reply

      Hey..are you the guy who posted a comment on The Dreamland Chronicles that introducing side characters as main characters would wreck the story? If so, I think it’s funny that you don’t think of Monica (the main character) as a “real character.”

  14. Tessa
    May 10, 2012, 2:24 am | # | Reply

    I COULD have sympathy for her… But well, she can also teleport, and say things about poiting people into a volcano and actually follow through. So yeah, no sympathy. If Deitzel runs off, just teleport him back.

    • Julie
      May 10, 2012, 8:33 am | # | Reply

      I bet she hadn’t thought about poiting him back. 🙂 Plus, if they’re at a park with lots of people around, she can’t just poit to Dietzel or poit him from one place right back to her side. That’s a breach of supernatural-people-undercover protocol. 😛

  15. Sanj
    May 10, 2012, 2:34 am | # | Reply

    My brother has a problem like this. They can’t understand that he is actually unwell often because he can’t eat enough to put on the weight he needs to have. I like seeing the point being made here that skinny does not necessarily equal healthy, and that big boobs are not necessarily a wonderful thing. The running thing has me cringing in sympathy…

    Good to see her recognizing the problem! She seems pretty mad at herself, too…

  16. Jay-Em
    May 10, 2012, 3:44 am | # | Reply

    Yes, M, i am very sorry, but that image gives me the giggles..bad…

    • Darg
      May 10, 2012, 4:03 am | # | Reply

      I do believe that’s the point she was making; she’s sick and tired of that image making people giggle. That, in turn, makes her not want to exercise, which circles back around to her original point that she’s out of shape because she doesn’t exercise enough though no one believes her because they’re too busy giggling at the stacked skinny girl trying to keep her boobs from giving her black eyes.

  17. Rex Hondo
    May 10, 2012, 5:02 am | # | Reply

    The way people lost their shit when whe got her hair cut, I shudder to imagine the reaction if she got a breast reduction.

    • Julie
      May 10, 2012, 8:34 am | # | Reply

      LOL! Fair point!

  18. Graymalkin56
    May 10, 2012, 5:42 am | # | Reply

    Is this leading up to breast reduction surgery?

  19. Justa Wud Turner
    May 10, 2012, 5:45 am | # | Reply

    Has Monica considered breast reduction surgery? It would prevent numerous physical ailments, financial savings in relation to foundation garments, visits to Dr. Nyles Crane, lawn repair due Dietzal’s squirrel fear, carbonized bodies clogging volcanos and imagine all the ink Paul would save…

    • Dave
      May 10, 2012, 7:39 am | # | Reply

      She did mention the idea years ago, and rejected it. I don’t have a link to the page, but as best as I can recall her thinking was along the line of “For better or worse, this is who I am, and I’m not going to let a surgeon tamper with me.”

    • jwhouk
      May 10, 2012, 8:24 am | # | Reply

      Wow, three straight on Breast Reduction.

  20. Justa Wud Turner
    May 10, 2012, 5:47 am | # | Reply

    Sorry Graymalkin, I would have replied to you but was busy writing my blurb…

  21. Jayessell
    May 10, 2012, 6:16 am | # | Reply

    I read somewhere (one of the Larry Niven books?) that people of the future would bicycle between teleportals to get exercise. To them it would look like the Hanna-Barberra chase scenes where the same doors and table keep passing in the background.
    Monica can find someplace to run and poit as much as she needs to. Or MORE than she really needs to.

    • Dave11
      May 10, 2012, 6:59 am | # | Reply

      “The Theory and Practice of Teleportation”, a (semi?) serious paper written and presented by Niven at a major university (MIT or CalTech, I believe) before I was born. The “run between two teleport booths” for exercise was one of the more serious ideas in the paper – by far the silliest was the reactionless drive for the Earth composed of two teleport portals, some iron filings, and one of the geographic poles of the planet.

  22. TheDoctor
    May 10, 2012, 7:56 am | # | Reply

    Well, I see whats going on here today.
    Monica is looking at US the readers, as though she was George Burns filling in plotlines on his TV show before Gracie comes back from the kitchen or whereever. Point being Monica is breaking down the Fourth wall to talk to us. Shes trying to convey she knows shes “100% all Natural since the 3rd grade” (her words), Inside that Fantastic-looking shell is a lady with health issues. Sure she can POIT read and speak ancient texts no other living human has seen before, however Shes scared,I think of her Mortality.
    Monica sweety, take the stairs instead of the elevator eat more salad instead of fries with the burger and if it makes you feel better, have Shelly come to your house for personal training, and you’ll be throwing engine blocks in no time. Good Luck Kid.

    • IS_Wolf
      May 10, 2012, 3:47 pm | # | Reply

      But how much was the engine block chucking, actually a result, of Shelly actually being a Sphinx as opposed to a human. 😛

  23. The Old Wolf
    May 10, 2012, 8:05 am | # | Reply

    Monica, kwitcherbellyakin. You’ve already decided reduction surgery is not an option. If you’re out of shape and it bothers you, find an exercise program that works; running is far from the only way to get your heart rate up. Otherwise, accept the fact that you’re committed to being out of shape at the moment and move your life forward in other areas.

  24. Skywatcher68
    May 10, 2012, 8:54 am | # | Reply

    M needs to invest in something that’s better able to reign in the girls.

    Also from the red-headed pixies with big racks department, I give you Virginia Bell.
    http://i2.listal.com/image/752241/600full-virginia-bell.jpg

    • scantrontb
      May 10, 2012, 9:57 pm | # | Reply

      while i admit it’s a nice picture, you’re WAY of target there. that won’t restrain ANYTHING but her stomach… besides, she’s also complaining about having to wear “tummy containing skirts” as well, so i don’t think it will have the desired effect you’re thinking it will.

      • Skywatcher68
        May 11, 2012, 9:57 am | #

        Didn’t intend to suggest anything in that picture. I was thinking of the bras that my wife somtimes wears to make her 44DD girls look smaller, keeps unwanted movment to a minimum as well.

  25. W.
    May 10, 2012, 8:56 am | # | Reply

    Oh, boy. People are coming down harder on Monica than I would have thought. Monica, has a problem, and part of that problem is people aren’t recognising that she has a problem. I wonder if Paul is jaded yet about just how effective his story telling is in getting reactions out of his readers. I am hoping that Tina and Monica take a Yoga class together at Punk Yoga. Not only will it give Paul the opportunity to draw them in various interesting poses, the philosophy behind it would do M. a world of good.

    • Dave
      May 10, 2012, 9:27 am | # | Reply

      Yup.

      Consider a person who realizes that s/he is overweight, badly out of shape, eats junk food, has high cholesterol, gets winded climbing stairs, and in general is running some serious health risks as a result. Goes to friends, says “I want to get in shape and improve my health.” Reaction is likely to be positive… encouragement, recommendations for fitness/training programs, “Hey, me too, let’s do it together for mutual support”, more suggestions for changes to diet than you could put in ten cookbooks, and cheers for every incremental change.

      Now, Monica. She is badly out of shape, eats junk food, has high cholesterol, gets winded climbing stairs, and in general is running some serious health risks as a result… but she’s skinny and busty. Goes to friends, says “I want to get in shape and improve my health.” Reaction is (apparently) uniformly negative… “You’re not fat! Why would you even want to change? You have looks to kill for! Don’t you realize how good you have it? What are you whining about?”

      Problems, about 90% similar.

      Social reaction to problems, almost exactly opposite.

      Factor which leads to the difference in social reaction: about 95% inborn and not under Monica’s control.

      That’s why she’s royally pissed off right now.

      • War
        May 10, 2012, 10:11 am | #

        And that’s the point people keep missing all because she’s skinny with tits and has been treated like a dumb spoiled sex doll princess all her life.

      • Dave
        May 10, 2012, 10:36 am | #

        Agreed. She’s running into a serious case of social prejudice, in the literal sense of the word. People are “pre-judging” her health and fitness concerns (and, as you say, her character and very nature) based on one or two aspects of her inborn physical form.

        The fact that she is shaped according to some peoples’ image of “ideal” is trumping everything else. Her “blessing” is in fact somewhat of a curse… and a big part of the curse is the fact that most people refuse to believe it can possibly be a curse!

        Do not judge her, until you’ve jogged a few miles in her bra.

      • Vorlonagent
        May 10, 2012, 10:43 am | #

        I really don’t see why anybody ought be down on M.

        Monica has brought her problems to Tina plenty of times before (usually supernatural problems), Tina’s optimism takes a little of the edge off and her cryptic advice is often good. A little bit of that was all Monica was looking for. She’s not looking for a workout buddy or a co-dependent to make her concerns go away.

        And Tina chooses now to have an all too human moment.
        Congrats, Tina. This is a big day for you. 🙂

      • Shay
        May 10, 2012, 10:56 am | #

        The “health problems vs social problems” thing is a big part of this argument. Monica suffers all of the health problems that other overweight people suffer, but none of the social repercussions. Who hasn’t heard the words “fat, lazy, and disgusting” used to describe an overweight person? The media also likes to depict fat people as stupid or childish, two more stereotypes to overcome. Monica is inadvertently suggesting that being visibly overweight is not a problem and *that* is what puts people on the defensive: it’s a social problem.

      • Paul Taylor
        May 10, 2012, 11:56 am | #

        Monica is in NO way saying that “being visibly overweight is not a problem”. She’s saying that she’s being written off for wanting to become healthy because some people only see her as thin and busty, those people equate that with “skinny=already healthy” and “busty=quit-complaining-you-have-the-world-by-the-ass”. Her point is that she IS unhealthy and when she has tried exercising in the past (even with the best sports bras made) people still see her as nothing more than a pair of running tits.

      • Pamala5768
        May 10, 2012, 3:15 pm | #

        A very good summary of my thoughts on the matter Dave. +1

  26. pbhunnydew
    May 10, 2012, 9:44 am | # | Reply

    Maybe M should talk to Wonder Woman for a comfortable breast plate sport bra. That will help with the bounce and she can work out

    PBH

  27. Michael Michael Motorcycle
    May 10, 2012, 10:02 am | # | Reply

    I am M’s opposite apparently. I look unhealthy, but I am physically fit, with zero health problems. Although, the bouncing from running has happened on occasion >.>

  28. Bucc-i
    May 10, 2012, 10:13 am | # | Reply

    Poor Monica, that’s not embarrassing.

    • Dave
      May 10, 2012, 1:53 pm | # | Reply

      Well, dude, I think you just did exactly the kind of thing that Monica is so angry about.

      You just declared that she’s wrong, that her concerns are invalid, and ignored how the situation feels to her. And, you did this because you like how she looks to you (or so I infer based on your previous comments).

      That’s the sort of reaction she’s been getting from lots of people, for years, and it sounds as if she is very tired of it.

  29. Sgt. Howard
    May 10, 2012, 10:16 am | # | Reply

    It would seem that Monica’s snit
    is all about not being fit
    but as her breasts swell
    (and her belly as well)
    Could her oven have a BUN it it?

    • Sgt. Howard
      May 10, 2012, 10:17 am | # | Reply

      My PHD is in LIMRICK

    • Danzier
      May 10, 2012, 8:17 pm | # | Reply

      My sister-in-law is having a baby and had serious problems health-wise because she couldn’t put weight on. The baby’s nutrition was being badly affected…

      With that in mind, I hope and pray that M doesn’t have anything baking. It will only make her hurt more.

      Limerick is awesome, but I can’t manage one today.

  30. TlalocW
    May 10, 2012, 10:48 am | # | Reply

    Poiting people into volcanoes is so… Xenu. Been done millions of years ago and has lead to annoying (and stupid) celebrities being bilked out of millions of dollars by telling them that their OT levels are improving… ANYWAY, she should do a variation of a classic – Edgar Allan Poe’s, “Cask of Amontillado.” She just needs to build the brick encasement once and poit people into it as needed. Also building the enclosure will be a good starter exercise program that she can then take in any number of directions in regards to exercise programs.

    • Yamara
      May 10, 2012, 1:08 pm | # | Reply

      Douglas DC-8s can teleport?

      • TlalocW
        May 10, 2012, 2:47 pm | #

        For God’s sake, YES! Xenu is gonna getchu.

      • Dave
        May 10, 2012, 6:47 pm | #

        Oh, wonderful. Xenuphobia. That’s all we need around here… get thee behind me, thetan 😉

        (*clink*)

      • Atomic
        May 10, 2012, 9:13 pm | #

        I’m sending you my screen cleaning bill. Chocolate milk really gets into the works.

  31. Glass_skunk
    May 10, 2012, 11:18 am | # | Reply

    yeah, aww man now i’m sad 🙁 Thinking about how i haven’t been able to jump, or run since i was a kid. Remeber when DDR was a huge deal? I had to sit on the sidelines, because yeah…TnT

  32. Francisco
    May 10, 2012, 11:24 am | # | Reply

    I can’t help but wonder if there’s some kind of cosmic joke:

    Let’s see: Both Tina and Monica realise that they are out of shape on the same day and they are both looking to the other for moral support. However, because both of them are worrying about their own health issues, they are not listening to the other.

    Shelly, Bud or some other neutral person, is required to help them realise that they both have similar problems and that, if they stopped screaming at one another, could probably find a mutual solution.

    I do think that they should look at possibly going to the gym together, watching what each other eats, etc.

    • IS_Wolf
      May 10, 2012, 3:58 pm | # | Reply

      To be fair, Tina hasn’t told Monica that she’s having similar issues.

      Situation:
      – Monica comes in, with a funk.
      – Tina asks what’s the matter.
      – Monica explains.
      – Tina hasn’t exactly listened to what Monica said and belittles the problem.
      – Monica tries to explain it again.
      – Again Tina doesn’t listen and says something that belittles the problem.
      – Monica explodes in fury.

      Whole mess was started by Tina not listening to what Monica was saying, despite her specifically asking what was troubling Monica.

      If you’re not really interested in why someone is in a funk, then don’t ask, and if you do ask, don’t belittle the issue as if it were nothing important. It’s important enough to put someone in a funk after all.

  33. joecrouse
    May 10, 2012, 2:08 pm | # | Reply

    wonder if she could poit a bit of extra top mass to Bud
    ISTR Bud complainging she was not as ample as Monica.

  34. Mikey
    May 10, 2012, 2:19 pm | # | Reply

    OKAY I FINALLY GET IT!!

    I’m glad I read through the comments, I experienced alot of anger from this last weeks of comics and the comments section as finally made me realized where the anger is coming from.

    It’s jealousy! I’m mad at her for not taking advantage of what she has and that jealousy is also blinding me to the problems she’s facing.

    See, the anger is from the fact that Monica is evidence that the finish line of being skinny/sexy/healthy will mean happiness DOES NOT EXIST.

    Imagine that society told you “oh don’t worry, if you only had THIS, you’ll be super awesome and happy!” And you buy it hook, line, and sinker. Then someone who you assume has it comes along and is like “Dood, it’s not that good” Well then, you’d want to reject it out of hand, with anger because it would mean everything you’ve been doing up til now to get at that goal has been meaningless and you have invested too much time and money into something meaningless.

    And by you, I mean I 😀

    Thanks comment section!

    • bmonk
      May 10, 2012, 5:28 pm | # | Reply

      I agree, except for one thing: she’s saying she’s NOT healthy! She’s out of condition, no matter what her shape looks like. Part of the whole problem this week is that the person she went to for sympathy (Tina) doesn’t get what she’s upset about.

    • Dave
      May 10, 2012, 8:02 pm | # | Reply

      Well said, Mikey – thank you!

      Yes, “the finish line to happiness” via beauty, or sex, or wealth, or power… is (at best) “not guaranteed to exist”. Much of the time it’s entirely an illusion. Quite often, it’s an utter scam… it means that people are trying to sell you something, for their own benefit much more than yours.

      If happiness comes at all, it has to come from within (or so I’ve come to believe over the years).

      Think of how many of the “rich and famous” glamor set go through multiple marriages, drinking and drug problems, “lifestyle crashes” of all sorts.

      Remember Richard Cory

      And then (once you’ve had time to digest what you’ve realized… and it’s a *big* realization!), you’ve got a treat in store for you. You can let go of the anger you’re feeling… and realize that you’ve just earned your freedom. There’s happiness out there for sure… but now you know where it isn’t and can look elsewhere.

  35. LoLDrood
    May 10, 2012, 2:52 pm | # | Reply

    Monica gets no sympathy from me this arc.
    They have surgery to solve problem A
    They have gyms to solve problem B
    Get on it.

    • Dave
      May 10, 2012, 4:02 pm | # | Reply

      If Monica chooses Option A (surgery) she is almost certainly going to run into exactly the same problem, from lots of people.

      “You’re going to do what??? . You’re gorgeous. You have a rack from heaven… cleavage that most women would die for! And, you’re skinny! You must be sick / crazy / ungrateful to want to mutilate such a hot, sexy body! You owe it to the world to stay just as you are!!”

      At which point, I would expect the population of the nearest active volcano to increase sharply.

    • Ari
      May 10, 2012, 4:58 pm | # | Reply

      Yeah, while I don’t entirely agree with your sentiment, I’m kind of with you. I’m really over this self pity arc. I don’t take self pity very well in real life let alone a fictional world.

      You are who you are. Self-deprecation does not change a damn thing. You want to be active? Then be active, but don’t complain about everything about yourself. I thought the point of Monica was that she was more than just big boobs. She understood who she was and she worked what she had. This Monica is making me want to smash heads together.

      And Monica, try being a fat chick with big boobs running after some one. If people aren’t staring at my boobs going “You’re going to hurt somebody with those” then they’re gawking at my stomach going “God, she’s so disgusting.” And I work out!!! Sorry….that’s been bugging me since I saw the comic last night. lol

    • Danzier
      May 10, 2012, 8:21 pm | # | Reply

      …Surgery is expensive.

    • Atomic
      May 10, 2012, 9:09 pm | # | Reply

      The point of the rant is that’s she’s in a no-win situation. Sadly, much of life is like that. It’s like the joke about the guy everybody thought was an idiot. Then he does something really clever and useful — now they think he’s an idiot savant.

      M has already accepted herself as she is… boob and all, but now it grates to see others who don’t see it that way. She’s tired of laughing at herself for the sake of others. When she can get over THAT, then’s she’s on her way.

      The Romans had their own version of the 7 Deadly Sins. And one of them was Approval Seeking. The more you leech “self esteem” from others approving of you, the more you devalue yourself. M is sorting out this challenge.

      It’s not that haters going to hate, it’s that you can’t cure stupid. Not you job. Keep calm and carry on!

  36. Kessog
    May 10, 2012, 5:48 pm | # | Reply

    What I don’t get is the assumption that running is required. There are dozens of different exercises, many of which would be suited to her…limits. Swimming would, hands down probably be the best one. Then there’s treadmills, stair climbers and God knows how many other low intensity (meaning low speed and therefore less bounce) exercises. With her income she should have no problem paying for some type of machine if she doesn’t want to be a spectacle at a gym.

  37. Erik
    May 10, 2012, 6:11 pm | # | Reply

    The funny thing is that I own a lingerie store that’s really good at helping out women like her…

    • Paul Taylor
      May 10, 2012, 6:26 pm | # | Reply

      Very cool! =) My friend Jenette Goldstein, the gal who played Pvt Vasquez in the movie Aliens has a bra shop specifically for gals who use the rest of the alphabet. http://www.jenettebras.com/ It’s good to know that there are more around. =)

  38. Danzier
    May 10, 2012, 8:35 pm | # | Reply

    Hmmm.

    After reading the comments, and the comic, and yesterday’s again… I’m on M’s side.

    “Shut up and Listen!” is the wail of my life. Feeling that nobody understands because they cut you off in mid-sentence and didn’t hear what you said because it didn’t jive with their mental process WILL KILL YOU. Kill you just as dead as a bullet or a sleazy diet or three hundred years.

    It hurts.

    • Yamara
      May 10, 2012, 9:56 pm | # | Reply

      Weapons, poor nutrition and time… aren’t sentient. The first two are themselves failures to communicate. The third is the unavoidable hallway to death.

      Though it’s a very big and elaborate hallway, with a lot of different people milling around. Some are fighting, some are arguing and a whole lot are posturing. Sometimes it’s hard to find a quiet corner to just rest, and to have a conversation? Most hardly speak more than one language, and none of them are master telepaths.

      Still, it’s not utterly impossible. It’s not at all easy, every day, but communication does happen. Sometimes ideas even come from the dead, no small trick in this hallway.

      It can be painfully frustrating, one individual opening their story to others. Pain is not all bad, of course, because it means the killing hasn’t succeeded yet. But none of that is the goal, which is itself an unfocused prize that gets redefined as we converse along.

  39. Rod Salm
    May 10, 2012, 10:08 pm | # | Reply

    Poited?
    I love how much chatter this toon has generated. Paul, I once again bow down to your ability to captured dialogue, real dialogue, in your writing. Well done. As to what’s been said, I have no idea, sorry.

    Rod Salm
    Death at your Door – a weekly webcomic about Death trying to live a life.

  40. chicgeek
    May 10, 2012, 11:41 pm | # | Reply

    Any surgery has risks. Going under anestetic can be scary. It’s expensive, and painful, and people will constantly be giving her shit about reducing her boobs. Plus, it’s a pretty drastic solution. Maybe she will someday in the future-who knows? But enough of the ‘she should just get surgery if it bugs her! Jeez!’ Like it’s as simple as going to the corner for a cup of coffee. And the people telling her to shut up, quit whining, and just exercise already? People, she just had her revelation this morning! And why isn’t she allowed to talk about it with a friend? And why isn’t she allowed to be angry when the friend isn’t listening? And the ‘how dare she complain when she’s skinny!’ Skinny doesn’t automatically mean healthy! I’m hearing a lot of ‘you fit society’s ideal of skinny and big boobs, so how dare you complain. Oh, and I don’t care that those boobs cause you problems-I want to either leer at them or laugh at them, so shut up.’ I’m interested to see where this goes.

    • GreyWolf
      May 10, 2012, 11:48 pm | # | Reply

      As the husband of a nurse and a guy who considered (briefly) becoming a surgical tech just so he and the woman he loved could work together – you are dead on.

      Soon as that scalpel breaks the skin, a whole WORLD of statistical possibilities just opened up, all leading towards your disability or death. Most are small but are now much larger than they would have been if that scalpel never left the table.

      Which is why anytime a doctor seems eager to perform surgery, I will suddenly get eager to find a second opinion.

  41. GreyWolf
    May 10, 2012, 11:43 pm | # | Reply

    My suggestion to Monica (or anyone IRL facing similar problems): talk to an expert. There are people out there that can show you ways you may not have thought of to get what you want.

    I have a large frame and am overweight. But listening to an expert a few years back, I got the best piece of advise for anyone who is dealing with “size overages” on their body, whether it be gut or, in M’s case, other body parts like their breasts.

    Four simple words: low impact, high intensity. Don’t run – bouncing hurts almost as bad on a pot belly as it does on M’s chest … trust me … and can wreck your knees, ankles, lower back. Instead – stair climber machine. If you can do that on max level for 15 minutes, then you just beat what any runner could do anyway, and was a lot less stressful on your joints, back and feet.

    As proof of that, how do you think back in the Navy we kept in shape for the annual physical test (including the run) while our ship was underway? You got it — on ships that didn’t have a decent area of deck to go running, we had a stair climber stashed somewhere.

    Alternate that with doing the bike on off days – also a good leg workout (seems legs are what she’s most worried about) and helps to tone the belly if you do it right – but adding in situps helps.

    That routine worked for me for quite a while, was my own mistake letting myself fall into a sedentary lifestyle and wrecking it. Now I am trying to get back to it again – wish me luck, heh.

    • Danzier
      May 11, 2012, 12:36 pm | # | Reply

      Good luck…

      …and I may follow up on that routine there. I have stairs and can do situps, even if I can’t bike yet. 🙂

  42. Centaur71
    May 27, 2012, 12:57 am | # | Reply

    Being that way myself Mona, you have my symps…

  43. Ziaheart
    June 3, 2012, 9:46 pm | # | Reply

    I’m tiny and I still have to hold my boobs running up stairs.

  44. Michael
    December 21, 2017, 10:20 am | # | Reply

    Its not funny getting clobbered by the own tits. Mostly.

Comment ¬ Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  • Home
  • About
  • Book Store
  • Bluesky
  • Twitch
  • Forum
  • Archive

©2001-2025 Paul Taylor | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Back to Top ↑